Propositions
by Shibaryou
Summary: The ongoing saga of Ramza's soldiers for hire as they take on jobs in bars across Ivalice. [Update: May 24th '07: Chapter 10 added]
1. Sad Traveling Artist

Propositions  
By Shibaryou  
Episode I: Sad Traveling Artist -or- Job Change! Hairstylist!

"Okay, what's this guy's name again? Miko?" Asked Ken, the Archer, as he and his two companions waited at the Gariland bar. It was late, and he was getting annoyed at the lateness of their client.

"His name is Mameko," Ai, the Priest, replied, "I don't know WHY Ramza trusted you of all people to come with us, you can't even remember his name!" She sighed, sitting at the counter, "Bartender, one glass of wine, please, I think I'm gonna need it..."

"When was the last time you ran into someone named Mameko?" Ken shouted, leaning against the wall. "Sounds like a dumb name, anyhow!"

"Guys, please!" Cried Osamu, the Knight, putting down a cup of tea he ordered, "We're supposed to HELP this guy, not argue amongst ourselves," He made a sharp glare at Ken. "OR make fun of his name."

"You're right, your name is worse." Ken casually commented. Soon after a large tea pot shattered against the wall, right over his head, Ken immediately ducked as hot tea and shards of broken clay fell on his head. Various people in the bar looked at Osamu and Ken in surprise.

Osamu looked up a shocked bar waitress. "Another pot of black tea, please." He said, as if nothing had happened.

"Y-Yes, sir!" The waitress walked into the back room to get another pot.

"Osamu! You want to get us thrown out of here!?" Ai whisper-shouted at her friend.

"Trust me, no-one wants to mess with a guy who's got the legendary blood sword sheathed at his side."

"That stupid thing you stole from Gafgarion at Golgorland?" Ken asked, "It's barely even wroth it these days! You can get a Long Sword to do more damage to an enemy's armor!"

Osamu unsheathed the sword, resting it on the table. The blood red blade shimmered in the dull light of the room, a few people at nearby tables moved away. "Hey, it took a lot of work to master the art of stealing weapons to get this thing! I had to train _every day_ for a _month_ to learn how to do it, just in case I ran into someone with a rare sword such as this!"

Ken grinned, "Oh, so that's why you bought that copy of 'Thievery For Dummies' in Warjilis... If I recall, it had something to do with a rumor of a 'black knight' with a blood sword in the area..."

Osamu's eyes widened, "H-Hey! I was too busy to get the proper skills from battle, so I took a shortcut! Is it so wrong to learn how to steal a weapon from a book?"

"You were too lazy to get the proper skills from battle," Ai commented, "and you were lucky that one of Ken's arrows bounced off the stone walls around the execution site and into Gafgarion's rear and causing him to drop it just before you 'stole' it!"

"I was so mad about missing that Time Mage... She cast that stupid Slow spell on me!" Ken shouted. "I hate that, I move at the rate of a snail and it's hard to concentrate!"

"Then become a Time Mage yourself and learn how to use haste!" Osamu shouted, sheathing his sword. "It's not that hard! I learned how to avoid break techniques without even trying!"

Ai sighed, "Ducking and rolling out of the way doesn't count."

"But, you've gotta admit, it works!"

Ken grinned at Ai. "At least it works better than the time he threw a clod of dirt at Wiegraf when he was still a squire..."

Osamu's face turned red. "Hey! Keep it down! No-one needs to know about that incident!"

"Oh yeeeaaaah!" Ai said, evilly. "When we fought him at that Windmill Shed... Osamu got behind him and threw a clod of dirt at his head instead of a rock!"

"And he said, 'Huh? ...Who threw DIRT at me!?'" Ken began to chuckle.

Ai continued, "And the 'genius' pointed to Delita and said, 'Him! Right there! There's your dirt thrower!' And, of course, guess who got a stasis sword blast in the face..."

"...No-one else, but, Osamu!" Ken finished, a couple people who overheard were laughing.

"Jerks... At least I distracted him long enough for Ramza to get some good attacks on him!" The Archer and the Priest continued laughing, until someone approached them.

"E... Excuse me... Are you Ai, Ken and Osamu?" He asked.

Ai was the first to look up at him, "Yes we are--" Her eye widened... Before her was a young man, early 20s (older than she was), blonde hair, blue eyes, but, above all he was... "Cuuuuute!" She shouted, lovestruck, standing next to the embarrassed man. "You're Mameko, right?"

Mameko slowly backed away. "Y-Yes."

Ken sat down next to Osamu. "Ai's got a new boyfriend." He joked.

"Poor Mameko." Osamu added, the two boys began to chuckle. Until a dark shadow loomed over their heads, they up in terror. "...Uh-oh..."

"Shut up!" Ai screamed, bringing her Wizard Staff down over the two warriors' heads as hard as she could.

"A...Agh..." Ken fell over, knocking his chair over.

"Are you... sure you... shouldn't be in a warrior class...?" Osamu fell face first onto the table, just as the waitress came back.

"Sir, your tea is ready!" The waitress placed it the tray with a full tea pot and cups in front of Osamu and walked off.

Osamu lifted his head up, just enough to look at the tea. "Argh...Bad luck...has...cursed me twice?" He asked, looking up and no-one in particular.

"What's wrong?" Mameko asked.

"...She forgot the sugar..." Osamu put his head back down and groaned in pain.

"Serves your right!" Ai shouted at the two unconscious Warriors. She then sighed, and rubbed the sides of her head in annoyance. "Anyone got a Phoenix Down? I don't want to waste my time and energy on a revive spell for these two idiots."

Mameko reached into his pocket and pulled out two Phoenix Downs, tossing them both on the unconscious Warriors. The magical feathers absorbed themselves into the Warriors and woke them up.

"Agh..." Osamu held his head in pain as he got up, "Ow..." He looked to his side, and saw Ken still laying on the floor. "...I think you killed him."

Ai sighed, "He's NOT dead." Ai lightly kicked Ken in the back.

Ken stirred and said, in a sleepy voice, "No Mommy, I don't want to go to the Academy today..." A loud whack was heard as Ai used her staff. "OW!" Ken jumped out in pain, "Ow! Ow! Ow!" He held his arm in pain, "What was THAT for?!"

"What _wasn't_ it for!?"

"Guys, Mameko." Osamu said, pointing to the lonely actor in a corner.

"Uh... Heh heh... Sorry..." Ai apologized to Mameko, a little embarrassed about her outburst. "Sorry about that, Mameko." Mameko only watched, looking as if he was thinking about something. He finally noticed Ai had been speaking to him.

"Oh, it's quite all right. I like watching peoples' personalities, it helps me think of characters for my plays." Mameko said, smiling a little.

Ai motioned for Mameko to sit down, she poured him a cup of tea, before sitting down next to him.

"So, what's your problem?" Osamu asked, ignoring Ken thrashing around in pain.

Mameko sighed, "I don't really know... I've lost my inspiration, I feel like I can't act or write anymore. And it would be hopeless if I were to write another performance..." He hung his head. "I've lost my gifts..."

There was a long pause as the group tried to think of a way to help Mameko. Osamu was the first to speak, "...Suppose you... Uh... No, that wouldn't work... What if you...? ...Nah, that'd NEVER work... Maybe if you tried... ...Darn it! I'm just not creative!" Osamu shouted, slamming his fist on the table.

"Hey! Why don't you try writing a new play?" Ken suggested. Mameko shot a glare at him. "What?" Ai just smacked him in the back of the head. "Ow!"

"...Waitress, a round of vaccas liquor, please," Ai said to a waitress who was passing by, "we're going to be here a while..."

"What about a play about the Zodiac Braves?" Osamu suggested, "I mean, the Zodiac Braves were really cool and they fought for justice!"

"...That's what my last failure was about..." Mameko hung his head, "This is hopeless..."

"No, it isn't!" Ai pat Mameko on the back.

"She's right!" Osamu said, "This isn't hopeless!"

"It's just almost hopeless!" Ken added. Mameko responded by bursting into tears.

"I'll never write another play again...! I'm a failure! FAILURE! FAILURE! FAILURE!" Mameko screamed, pounding his fists on table, almost knocking over his tea cup.

"You're not helping..." Osamu glared at Ken.

"Your order is ready!" The waitress who Ai had spoken to earlier came by, placed the round of vaccas liquor in front of Mameko, who was still crying, and left. "Have a nice night!"

"...And neither is she!" Osamu added, lowering his head, "This is going to be a long night..." He took his liquor and began to drink. "...What about changing your appearance?"

"Oh yeah!" Ai said, patting Mameko's back. "You could change your clothing. It could make you feel different!"

"How?" Mameko asked.

"Yeah, how? Osamu looks and acts stupid no matter _what_ he wears!" Ken shouted. Osamu elbowed him in the side.

"But... I've worn this same style for years!" Mameko said.

"What about changing your hair?" Ai asked.

Osamu thought. "Or your attitude!"

"Or your name!" Ken shouted, Ai elbowed him in the stomach. "Urk!"

"My... hair?" Mameko looked upward and felt his hair. "What's wrong with my hair?"

"Well... Maybe a new style would make you feel different! It might make you feel happy and get you out of this 'I suck at everything I do' phase!" Ai explained.

"You think so?"

"Osamu! Ken! Prepare some shampoo and conditioner!" Ai called, the two boys stood up, saluted and ran to the local item store.

"Which way to your house?" Ai asked.

"Down the block."

"Excellent!"

----------  
Meanwhile...

At the Gariland item shop...

"How can I help you?" Asked the shopkeeper.

"Got any shampoo, conditioner and other hairstyle products?" Ken asked.

"Yes, sir!" The shopkeeper pointed to various bottles of shampoos and conditioners stocked on a tall shelf. "There they all are!"

"...Uh... Which ones are the good ones?" Osamu asked, picking up a bottle. "...Herbal... Essence...?" He put it back. "I'm in way over my head here..."

"Just grab something! There can't be a difference!" Ken shouted.

Osamu sighed, closing his eyes and moving his arm left and right along the shelf, eventually stopping at a shampoo. "...I guess this'll work!" He picked it up, Ken grabbed a conditioner.

"Let's go!" Ken said, reaching into his wallet to produce the gil needed to pay for the shampoo and conditioner, but he paused. After a moment, he spoke up, turning his head to face Oasmu. "...Help?" He said, motioning to his wallet and the shopkeeper, who held out his hand with an annoyed look on his face.

Osamu sighed, he put the shampoo aside and paid for the hair care products.

The two Warriors went back to the bar...

...Only to find that Ai had already gone to Mameko's house, and left them to pay the bill before they got directions to Mameko's house from a waitress.

They arrived, only to find Mameko sitting on a chair with scissors, water, combs, brushes on a table to his left, and Ai behind him, both waiting for Ken and Osamu.

"Finally!" Ai took the products. "Head into the other room, Mameko prepared some food for you two!"

Ken and Osamu headed into the other room, finding a bowl of fruit in front of them.

"All right! Peaches!" Ken began eating one of the Peaches, Osamu took a banana.

It was about half an hour into Ai's attempts at styling Mameko's hair before a well recognized scream was heard...

"KEN! OSAMU! IF YOU DON'T GET YOUR BUTTS IN HERE RIGHT NOW YOU'RE GONNA WISH QUEKLAIN FINISHED YOU OFF WHEN HE HAD THE CHANCE!"

"...Ai's mad..." Ken stated.

"What'd we do now?" Osamu shouted, getting up. He and Ken wandered into the other room...

Only to gape in horror as they found Mameko with an amazing hairstyle, no arguing that point, but...

...His hair had gone from blonde to blue, Mameko, due to lack of a mirror was clueless as to what Ai was upset about.

"...Do you idiots know what you BOUGHT!?" Ai shouted, throwing the bottle of Shampoo into Osamu's hands.

"Let's see... ShinRa brand shampoo, guaranteed to leave your hair as beautiful as ever with a... new... blue... color..." Osamu almost dropped the shampoo in shock. "Oops..."

"You two are SO--"

"BEAUTIFUL!"

Ai, Osamu and Ken looked over to Mameko, who was looking at his new hair in a hand mirror. "I love it! It's so much better than before!"

"But it's... Blue!"

"My favorite shade of blue!" Mameko smiled, putting down the mirror. "I even came up with the perfect play!"

"...You did?" Ken asked.

"A story, about a Priest named Seph... Who's dream is to one day become a hairstylist," Mameko described the play. "But, his cruel master Jen refuses to let him become a hairstylist until he pays her back for the money his family had stolen from her."

Osamu, Ai and Ken clapped. "Great idea!" Ai told him.

"I thank you all! But, please, before you go..." Mameko walked over to a safe, unlocked it and pulled out a large bag of gil. "Please, take this as a token of my gratitude!"

"This much!?" Ken took the bag, two large Gs appeared in his eyes as a large grin spread across his face.

"Yes, it's the least I can do!" Mameko smiled broadly, reaching for a feather pen and some paper from a desk, scribbling down a note. "Take this to the innkeeper down the street, and he'll give you a free room." He gave Ai the note. "It's a little late, I suppose we all need some rest for the night."

"Do you want us to come back tomorrow?" Ai asked, hoping for Mameko to say 'yes.'

Mameko thought for a moment. "I think I can write my play without help... But, as an extra thank you..." Mameko took another piece of paper from the desk, and gave it to Osamu and a pen. "If you can write down an address, I'll mail you three free tickets to see the play on opening night."

"Whoa! Thanks, Mameko! That'll be great!" Ken said.

"Ai, should I have it sent to Igros Castle? Ramza'll get the letter that way!" Osamu whispered to the Priest, who just nodded.

"Thank you all, very much. I feel ideas rushing into my head, already!" Mameko took the paper from Osamu when he finished writing.

Ken walked towards the door. "Good night, Mameko. Good luck with the play!"

Osamu and Ai did the same. "Good night." They said.

Mameko walked them to the door, after that he looked to his desk...His feather pen resting in the ink well, and a pile of blank paper. "To work!" He announced to himself, sitting down, starting to write his first success in months.

----------------------  
Job Report

Mameko, the traveling artist, restarted his act.  
Years back, he wrote many famous plays his audience praised his originality. But, he's been in a slump for a long time.  
We drank together all night, thinking about his new job. We suggested things to him like, "Why don't you change your hair style?"  
We were glad since he's starting to write again.  
-------------------------

Ramza's Evaluation:

I got your free tickets from a messenger a little while ago, the play's opening night is in two weeks. Expect to be there after your next job! Though, I recently saw a picture of Mameko in an advertisement for his new play, did you three have anything to do with the fact that his hair was blue or was that just something the artist who made the poster did?

The End.

_The first in the Propositions series, an ongoing tale based around everyone's favorite Final Fantasy Tactics characters... Those generic soldiers you can hire._

Well, okay, maybe the generics aren't everyone's favorite, but they are mine. Expect a lot of the characters to have either generic job classes or light variations of generic classes.

The series, to a degree, takes place sometime in Chapter 2 and goes on from there, references to in-game battles may occur in later chapters.

As Final Fantasy Tactics constantly references previous Final Fantasy games (up until FFVII) in its propositions (especially the mission items\unexplored lands), variations of certain characters may appear if the job description or report references or mentions them. Just think of them as the Bizzaro World versions.

See you next chapter,  
Shibaryou


	2. The Great Discovery Race I

Propositions  
Episode II: The Great Discovery Race -or- Matoya's Cave! The Lair Of The Beast!

--------------------------  
Proposition:

Adventurers Wanted!

The Dorter Travel Agency is sponsoring the Great Discovery Race, to find an ancient ruin or location in Ivalice! You could be the one to discover a forgotten ruin!

The Dorter Travel Agency

-----------------------------

"Geez, these guys really know how to have a contest in style." Ken said, looking at the inside of the chocobo cart, "I mean, we're getting driven here in style!"

"Well, that is what that 3,000 gil pays for," Ai explained, "So, we'd better find that forgotten Ruin, or else Ramza is going to kill us!"

"Yeah, you can buy a lot of X-Potions with 3,000 gil..." Osamu added, "And Ramza would be upset it we wasted all this time and money for nothing."

Ken crossed his arms, "Bah, we get that much gil from battle!"

"...How?" Osamu and Ai asked in unison.

"...You mean I'm the only one here who goes through the wallets of the Warriors and Mages we defeat?" Ken asked, innocently.

Ai's eyes widened, "You rob the soldiers we fight?!"

"I don't think of it as robbing, I like to call it, 'finders keepers, losers losers.'" Ken stated.

Osamu sighed, "...Ken, it's still robbery!"

"But I get a nice profit out of it! Remember when we fought Wiegraf? That time he DROPPED his wallet when he teleported outta there!" Ken shrugged, "Now tell me, would it have been a GOOD idea to risk my life just to return a simple 10,000 gil to him or would it have been a GOOD idea to buy a bunch of Hi-Potions for my supply bag?"

Osamu and Ai exchanged glances, "...Well..."

"Five of those Hi-Potions were what came in handy later at Fort Zeakden!"

"...Fine, but, we still think it's wrong..." Ai said, looking out the window, "...Think we'll get to this 'designated spot' any time soon?"

"Beats me! How'd they choose this 'designated spot' anyway?" Ken asked.

"Well, when we signed up, they told us to go to a certain chocobo cart, and my guess is that each chocobo cart goes somewhere either closer of further away from the Forgotten Ruin than where we started." Osamu explained, "That's my theory, since a few of these carts went our way, and then turned."

"...So, think we got stuck with the good chocobo cart or the bad chocobo cart?" Ai asked.

"I'll check!" Ken reached his head out the window, "HEY! Old man!" He shouted to the driver, "Is this thing going close or far from the Forgotten Ruin?" There was a pause, "Thanks!" Ken pulled his head back into the cart.

Osamu looking out the window, "Well?"

"The driver said 'shut up and put your head back in there, you wanna get it knocked off by a tree or something? Stupid kid!'"

"And what does that mean for the Ancient Ruin?" Ai asked.

"...Absolutely nothing!"

"..."

"..."

Osamu and Ai exchanged glances and sighed, then looked back out the window.

"Did I say something wrong?" Ken asked, the Knight and the Priest ignored him.

It was another two hours before they reached the "designated spot." By that time all three of them had fallen asleep.

Of course, when Osamu was the first to wake up, he noticed something that wasn't quite right with their situation...

Osamu looked around, "...Okay, I'm not in the chocobo cart..." He looked at the ground, "Him... Yellowish... Very dry... A sandlike structure... If I didn't know better, I'd say this was sand." He looked up at the sky, "...Sun, hot sun... Beating down... Vultures, circling overhead..." He looked to his left, "...Big, spiky, green, plant-thing. Most likely a cactus..." Osamu thought for a minute, "This reminds me of a desert...Wait a second..." He looked to his left, seeing Ai, on the ground, "...Where's the chocobo cart?" He looked over to Ai, "Ai...? Please be sleeping..." He crawled over to his and gently shook her.

"TAKE THIS GAFGARION!" Ai screamed, bolting straight up and punching Osamu.

"AGH!"

Ai opened her eyes a moment later, "Huh? ...Darn it, Osamu!! You woke me up!! And I was having a wonderful dream about knocking the stuffing out of Gafgarion!"

"I think you knocked out my stuffing..." Osamu moaned in a daze.

"...Hey, were we in a desert earlier?"

"...I think we're in our 'designated location.'"

"...Of all the stupid places to designate a location..." Ai muttered, "..Hey, where's Ken?"

"Mmmm... Agrias... Come closer... please..." Ai and Ken looked to the source of Ken's voice.

Osamu's eyes widened, "...He's..."

"...You've GOT to be kidding me..." Ai shouted as Ken, still in the middle of his dream, continued to hug a cactus.

"Your lips are like silk..." Ken mumbled, giving the cactus a light 'peck.' Ai recalled seeing him do this with his pillow, once. Osamu recalled it as being at least weekly.

"...Oh, how I WISH Ramza could see this..." Ai said, "He'd never been in another battle for as long as he lives..."

"Should we wake him up or wait until one of those spikes stabs him good enough to wake him up?" Osamu asked.

"...Wake him up, I wanna see the look on his face when he realizes just WHAT he's making out with."

Osamu got up and walked over to the dreaming archer, he cleared his throat, "HEY! What are _you_ doing with Agrias! LEG AIM!" He shouted, in a Mustadio-esque voice. He poked Ken in the leg.

Ken woke up, his eyes widened, there was a short pause, "...YEEEEEEOOOOOOWWWWWWW!" He screamed, jumping back and spitting out cactus thorns, "Agh! I knew that dream was too good to be true!"

"Serves you right! If Agrias heard about this, you'd get run through so fast, you'd be dead before you knew it!" Ai shouted, kicking Ken in the back.

"...So, where are we?" Ken asked, looking at his surroundings, "...Bed Desert, maybe?"

"I'd say we're in Zeklaus Desert..." Osamu commented, "Bed desert usually has some Ancient Ruins visible in the distance."

Ken looked around the surroundings, "Guys... Desert, that means, no water. We NEED to find water!"

"Okay! Let's head off!" Osamu said, "...Which way should we go?"

"That way!" Ken and Ai said, pointing in opposite directions.

"THAT way!?" Ai shouted, turning to Ken, "This coming from you who's sense of direction got Ramza lost in Orbone's book library, TWICE, looking for an exit?"

Ken glared at Ai, "Well, pardonez moi, Little Miss, 'I say we take this route through Sweegy Woods so we'll get to Igros faster'! YOU got us lost for a WEEK around the Bervenia Volcano!"

"HEY! At least I didn't get lost in Goug and show up to 'save Mustadio' AFTER we already beat all of Rudvich's mercenaries!" Ai screamed, pushing Ken.

"These are the words of the same Priest who got us lost in Lionel Castle, chasing after Draclau?" Ken pushed Ai back.

"Grrrrr... TAKE THIS!" Ai screamed, giving Ken a good hard whack across the face with her staff.

Ken fell to the ground, he got back up, "Yeah, like that even hurt!" A large black shadow loomed over him, Ken stepped back in fear, "...No touchies..."

Osamu looked away as a loud crack was heard, Ken fell to the ground with a broken Wizard Staff over his head.

"Grrrr...! Look what your thick skull did to my staff!" Ai shouted, holding up the two pieces of wood, "This cost me 1,000 Gil!"

Ken was in a daze, "Ouchies..."

"On second thought. I'd gladly spend 1,000 Gil for a chance to crack your skull..." Ai muttered, she turned to Osamu, "Since you seem to be the most intelligent out of all the warriors here, where do you think we should go?"

Osamu stepped back as he saw the anger in Ai's eyes, "Um...Your direction?"

"Good choice." Ai looked down at Ken and poked him with the bottom half of her staff, "Get up! We're going!"

"Can't I have a moment to rest...? My head hurts..."

Ai turned and faced Ken, "Quit complaining! It's not like it's anything you use!"

Osamu stepped backwards and bumped into Ai, "Ai... We... We've got trouble..."

Ai sighed, "What is it?" She turned to Osamu...

...And about 3 Bull Demons.

"...Ken, get your crossbow..." Ai said, reaching backwards and pulling Ken up.

"Ow... Ow! You're lifting me by my hair... Ow! Ow!"

"Shut up and get your crossbow!" Ai screamed as the Bull Demons began to close in.

"All right! All right!" Ken shouted, he grabbed his crossbow and quiver of arrows, "Say your prayers El Toro..." He fired, hitting one of the Bull Demons in the shoulder, "Ha ha! Take that!" Ai smacked him in the back of the head.

"You moron! You're supposed to KILL them, not make them mad!" Ai pointed, the Bull Demon was holding the arrow it was shot with like a dart. It threw it, the arrow flew over Ken's head at incredible speed, parting his hair.

"...I'm outta here!" Was all Ken said, firing another arrow at a Bull Demon and taking off.

"Jerk!" Ai shouted, running after Ken.

Osamu began to run, until he felt a Bull Demon grab his cape, he turned and faced it, "I... I should warn you! I can defend myself!" He unsheathed his sword, "I have the legendary Blood Sword! I will use it!"

The Bull Demon just pulled it's fist back.

"...Um... Nice weather we're having?" Osamu said, sheathing his sword, intimidation wasn't working.

The Bull Demon just glared, holding it's fist back.

"...So... Do you have a special someone? I, myself, have been searching for a while, but..." Osamu could tell this wasn't working, "Um... What was that old saying...? Music tames the savage beast?"

The Bull Demon got ready to punch.

Osamu quickly began to sing, "Oh, I wish I were a ShinRa Brand wiener! That is what I'd truly like to be! 'Cause if I were a ShinRa Brand wiener--" Osamu was cut short as the Bull Demon punched him across the face, sending him flying back a few feet, his cape torn.

Ai and Ken quickly returned, hearing Osamu's singing was a signal that he was caught (by their guess, anyway).

Ai helped Osamu get up, "You know, music DOES tame the savage beast, it just helps if you sing ON KEY."

"...Well, I'd like to see YOU do better!" Osamu shouted, he got up and drew out his sword, "ATTACK!"

The battle began, the three Bull Demons and three Warriors (Well, two Warriors and a Mage) began to fight. Ken slowed down the oncoming Bull Demons with his arrows, while Osamu fought the Bull Demon that had punched him.

"Shinning light, be our armor to protect us... Protect!" Ai shouted, casting the magical shield spell on Ken and Osamu. The three Bull Demons quickly became one wounded Bull Demon.

The wounded Bull Demon let out a few growls and began to run.

"Get him! He's going over that sand dune!" Ai shouted, the group chased the Bull Demon over the dune, giving a loud and proud battle cry.

...Which was suddenly cut short when they reached the bottom of the dune and found not ONLY at least 20 more Bull Demons, but, a large numbers of Sacreds and Minotaurs...

Osamu was the first to speak, "...RUN!" The three took off running, closely followed by the army of Bull Demons, Sacreds and Minotaurs.

"Oh yeah! You just HAD to chase after it, didn't you!?" Ken screamed at Ai as they ran.

"Excuse me, YOU were the one who shot the first one!"

"Only because YOU told me to!"

Osamu, who was the furthest ahead, turned his head to the fighting Archer and Priest, "Would you BOTH quit it! Your arguing was what attracted the FIRST three!"

"Well I didn't see you try to stop us!" Ken shouted.

"I was too afraid to! You know how Ai's temper can be-- Ow!" Osamu rubbed the back of his head as part of Ai's broken Wizard Staff hit him, "See what I mean!?"

"Forget it! Just RUN!" Ken screamed as an axe from one of the monsters almost scalped him.

The chase went on for at least 15 minutes, the three humans finally stopped, the Bull Demons had mysteriously stopped behind them, not daring to move another step.

"That's... Odd... Why did that stop?" Ai looked at them, all of them in a straight line, not moving an inch forward.

"...I think it's this." Osamu pointed to the ground, he was knee deep in sand.

Ken sighed, "...Don't tell me... We're standing in...?"

"Yep..."

"...You thinking what I'm thinking?" Ai asked.

"Is it wave our arms around frantically and scream for help?" Osamu asked.

"Yes."

"HELP! HELP! WE'RE DOOMED!" Ken screamed, waving his arms around.

Within mere minutes the three were submerged completely. The Bull Demons shrugged and left.

"Uhn..." Groaned Osamu, felt his head, "...Ow... I feel like I landed on a rock..." He moaned, "W-wait a sec..." He looked up, "The... sand...! Is this the ruin...?" He stared at the ceiling... It was mostly sand, packed together, with a small trail of sand falling to the ground like an hour glass.

"Ow..." Ken's groan was heard next, "Where are we?"

"An underground cavern by my guess..." Ai muttered as she got up, "Where's the light coming from...?"

Osamu looked around, "...Whoah... You guys might wanna take a look at this..." He pointed to a bunch of large crystals, lining the wall of the cavern, somehow giving off light.

"Cool..." Ken said in awe.

"...Shouldn't we find a way out of here?" Ai asked.

"Yeah, good idea." Osamu turned to Ken, "Let's go Ken-- ...Ken?" Ken was gone.

"There he is..." Ai pointed to one end of the wall, where Ken was trying to pry off one of the Crystals.

"Grrgh! Come on...! I want one of these things...! I bet it'll make a cool addition to my...! Argh..! Collection of accessories! I bet I could use a few of them to make a bracelet or something!"

"Oh, God..." Ai walked over the Ken and grabbed the back of his shirt, "We're here to find Ancient Ruins, NOT play with Crystals!"

"But...! They're really pretty!" Ken shouted.

"Let's GO!"

"Meany!"

"And proud of it, Ken!"

The three teens continued on their way through the cave, until Osamu was the first to look into a large opening to their left, the way ahead being a dead end, "I'm not going in there." He said, Ai and Ken stopped right behind him, "No way! We should find another way out!"

"...What's wrong, Osamu?" Ai asked.

"...I'm not going in there."

Ken gave Osamu an odd look, "Why?"

"It... ...I... I can't say..."

"Is there a monster in there?"

"No."

"A Zodiac monster?"

"Nuh-uh."

"A mage?"

"Nope."

"A warrior?"

"No."

"Then WHAT?!" Ken shouted.

"...I... I have a confession to make... You two are my best friends so I KNOW you'll understand," Osamu looked into the tunnel and sighed, "...I'm afraid of the Dark."

"BWA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA HA!" Ken and Ai immediately fell over, laughing.

"...Then again, you two also find fun in watching me suffer..." Osamu stated, glaring at the laughing Priest and Archer.

"S-Sorry! You just... hehehehe... Took me by surprise!" Ai said, trying her best not to laugh.

"Geez! You're such a wuss!" Ken shouted, he gave Osamu his crossbow, "Watch! I'll go in there unarmed and show you how much of a chicken you are!" Ken marched into the darkness.

"Okay, knowing our run of luck so far..." Ai began, she paused.

"HOLY AJORA! HELP! SOMEONE! AAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIIIIIIIEEEEEEEE...!" Ken's screams were heard from the tunnel, various punching and kicking sounds were heard, and eventually, Ken was thrown out of the tunnel and into the cave wall, "Ugh... Pain...Big...scary...thing... in... Darkness..."

"...Something like that will happen!" Ai turned to face the battered and bleeding archer, "...Life's refreshing breeze, blow in energy! Cure!" A mystical light surrounded Ken, healing most of his wounds.

Osamu gave Ken his crossbow, "What HAPPENED?!"

Ken started to get up, "It was... I couldn't see it, it was so dark, but..." Ken grabbed Osamu's shoulders in fear, "IT WAS BIG AND SCARY AND HAD SHARP TEETH AND LONG CLAWS!" He screamed, frantically shaking the poor Knight.

Ai looked at the entrance to the cavern, "...Guys... Do you hear footsteps?"

Ken stopped shaking Osamu, "...It's... coming!"

Osamu jumped back, he drew out his Blood Sword, he stood in a battle ready position, waiting for the creature to show itself...

...A minute went by... Still, pounding footsteps were heard.

"...What's taking it so long?" Ai asked.

"It's... probably doing this for dramatic effect." The fear in Osamu's voice could be heard as he stood, still battle ready.

Roughly three more minutes went by... Still nothing but pounding footsteps.

"...Okay, it's... Probably... REALLY dramatic!" Osamu said, not battle ready, but, leaning against the wall with his sword at his side.

Ai glared at Ken, "...Ken, just how DID this thing beat you!?"

"It's slow, but, strong!" Ken said, in fear.

Finally, what seemed like an eternity of boredom later... The beast finally showed itself...

Two small eyes looked at them through the darkness... A golden fire burned in them...

Ai was the first to speak, "...Ken, judging by those eyes... ...It probably reaches halfway up to my knee..."

A small turtle emerged from the darkness. Ai and Osamu's eyes widened.

"THAT'S WHAT BEAT YOU TO A BLOODY PULP!?" Ai shouted, smacking Ken in the back of the head, "You idiot! You probably tripped over it!" She walked next to the turtle and pointed to it, "It's HARMLESS! It's a TURTLE!"

"...No way... It beat me up! It's probably behind the turtle!" Ken said.

"...Ken, it's a stupid-- OW!!!!" Ai jumped into the air, holding her foot in pain, "You little son of a...! It bit me!" She grabbed Osamu's sword, "Hey, boys! For dinner, tonight, turtle soup!" He raised it over her head.

The turtle gave her a sad, puppy dog (puppy turtle?) look, its eyes pleading for its life.

"...Forget it, NOTHING bites me and gets away with it!" Ai brought the sword down on the turtle.

A loud clang was heard. The Blood Sword flew into the air, and wedged itself into the ground.

Ai looked at the turtle in shock. It had gone into its shell, not even a scratch was on the shell, and she had used all of her strength!

"Whoah...That's one tough turtle..." Osamu commented.

Ai growled, she grabbed Ken's crossbow and aimed it at the turtle, "Say your prayers, Donatello..." She fired. The arrow bounced around the cave, after bouncing off the turtle's shell, Ai, Ken and Osamu ducked. A shout was heard, "OW!" It was Osamu.

"Osamu, are you all right?" Ai asked. Osamu just glared and turned around, pointing to an arrow stuck in his butt, "...Sorry!" She glared at the turtle, "Fine, if I can't KILL you, I'll KICK you!" Ai moved her foot back, and proceeded to kick the turtle with all of her strength. A loud clunk was heard as Ai's foot struck the turtle shell, not moving the turtle.

There was silence.

"...That's gotta hurt..." Ken mumbled.

"...This is... many... times more...painful than it... looks..." Ai slowly stated, before leaping into the air and grabbing her foot, "OW! OW! OW! STUPID TURTLE!"

Osamu sighed, "Okay, let's just..." He looked into the darkness, with fear, "...go around... the Turtle! We'll be fine!"

"All right..." Ai stepped behind Ken, "...You go first!"

"Wha!? Why me!?" Ken protested.

Ai growled, "Because if there's still something in there, it already KNOWS you!"

Ken groaned and walked ahead, "See ya, turtle!" He said, waving to the turtle as he walked by.

"_Dame._"

Osamu and Ai looked up, "Wha?"

"AGH!" Ken screamed, falling backwards with a mad turtle attached to his nose, "MY NOSE! MY NOSE! IT'S BITING MY NOSE!"

"...Did the turtle just speak?" Ai asked Osamu.

"...I think it did." Osamu replied.

"HELP! HELP!"

"...Ai, give me your staff!" Osamu held out his hand, Ai give him the one half of the staff she kept, "Ken! Try to lay on your back!" He shouted.

Ken laid flat, the turtle stood straight up on his nose, "Oh, no... You're not..."

"Fore!" Osamu shouted, using the staff as a golf club, knocking the turtle off Ken's nose and sending it through the cave, "Oh, boy..." He looked at the remains of Ai's staff, which had pretty much turned into splinters of wood.

"...Forget it, just run!" Ai pointed down the cave, the turtle was running back to them at full speed, which was unusually fast for a turtle.

The chase was on!

"_MATTE YO!_"

"...Is that the turtle?!" Ai asked, not sure who she was talking to in the darkness.

"I think it was!" Replied Ken, "Look! A light in the end of the tunnel! Let's go into the light!"

Osamu's voice was heard, "...Isn't that what people usually see in near-death experiences?"

Ai spoke, "You think a rabid talking turtle chasing us in a dark cave ISN'T a near-death experience?!"

"In most cases, not really..." Osamu mumbled.

"_ORE WA MATOYA NO HOGOSHA! DAME MO SHI!_"

Ken, Ai and Osamu ran into the light...

...And out of the cave, into a desert oasis with a waiting group of representatives from the Discovery Race Committee.

"Congratulations," A man extended his hand to the charging teens, "You're the first group to find--"

"MAD TURTLE! RUN AWAY!" Ai screamed, knocking the man over, running over him and behind people in the crowd, Ken and Osamu followed.

The turtle stopped at the entrance, it turned away and went back into the cave.

"...Wha...?" Ken looked at the turtle, "It...left! It was chasing us! IT SPOKE!"

The man Ai, Ken and Osamu run over got up, "That's the supposed guardian of Matoya's cave. After the light warriors helped Matoya, Matoya cast a spell on the cave, turning the first animal that walked into the cave, into the cave's eternal guardian."

"...And by total dumb luck, Matoya received a turtle for a guardian, right?" Ai asked.

The man nodded, "We didn't think anyone would ENTER the cave!"

"We didn't try to, we thought we were in a pool of quicksand and it turned out to lead into the cave." Osamu explained, "Eventually, we ran into that thing, which beat the heck out of Ken!"

Ken turned red from embarrassment, "H-hey! You could have left that part out!"

The man spoke again, "In any case, I give you this," He gave Ai a painting." A painting of Matoya's Cave, drawn by one of Ivalice's most talented artists," He gave Osamu a bag of Gil, "And this prize money, for being the first group to Matoya's cave." He gave Ken a basket with about nine or ten glass bottles, "And this bottled water."

"...What do we need that for?" Ken asked, holding up one of the bottles.

Hours later...

"Geez... You think the prize could have been a free chocobo cart ride out of here..." Osamu mumbled, walking through the desert with a glass of water in his hands, "I mean, it was hard enough GETTING here..."

"Travel Agencies are cheap, what can I say? This so called picture was done by some guy named 'Izlude', anyway."

"Yeah, most of this 'bag of Gil' is small rocks!" Ken said, throwing small rocks out of the bag, "There's probably only 3,000 Gil if we're lucky.

Osamu and Ai groaned.

"Grrrrrrrrrrrr..."

"...Osamu, was that your stomach growling?" Ai asked.

Osamu looked over to Ken, "No, Ken, was it--" Osamu stopped mid-sentence.

Ken looked at the shocked Priest and Knight in front of him, "...What?"

"...B-Behind you..." Ai pointed behind Ken, trembling.

Ken turned around... A group of 10 Sacreds stood behind him, "...RUN!"

Ai, Ken and Osamu were chased into the sunset, eventually finding their way back to Dorter and the waiting Ramza, Agrias and Mustadio (who helped take care of the Sacreds).

------------------------------------  
Job Report by Ai Jou:

The Dorter Trade City travel bureau sponsored a "Hunt."  
This was a contest to search for ancient ruins in various regions of Ivalice. Whoever found the secret finds first won. The participants were only allowed to use various scriptures, legends, and documents.  
The participants had a hard time in their search, due to the restrictions.

----------------------------------------  
Additional note from Ken:

Hey, Ramza, you aren't still mad about those Sacreds that followed us, are you? I could have taken them all on alone, but, Osamu and Ai didn't want me to look better than them in battle! It's their fault the Sacreds followed us! It's their fault we had to fight them in the middle of the bar and pay for the damages! It's their fault you had to buy all that new armor after that sacred picked you up by your leg and kept on slamming you against the wall until it threw you out the window! Did you get all of that glass out of your hair, by the way?  
Signed, Ken.

PS: By the way, how're your legs doing? That snap didn't sound too good.

-------------------------  
Ramza's Evaluation:

Well, you did all right on this one. I'll ignore most of what happened with the Sacreds (and Ken's note...), since monsters will be monsters (and idiots will be idiots). I've already signed you all up for a new job, head to the Gariland bar A.S.A.P!

------------------------------  
Ramza's Response to Ken's Note:

DON'T REMIND ME

The End

_Something tells me the Unexplored Land\Discovery Race Propositions will be a lot of fun. Somehow, seeing the heroes go through the land of Ivalice and stumbling upon more ancient ruins than Indiana Jones ever could hope to seems like a fun aspect..._

As for those wondering why I didn't use Rad, Alicia and Lavian... Well, whenever I play FFT, my original generics are a lot stronger than them and usually have better jobs by the start of chapter 2. Still, I sometimes keep them with me out of pity.

About the turtle, the fact it speaks Japanese is kind of an in-joke with a friend... "The original language" Matoya would have spoken back then (ie: Before NA localization). Translations:

MATTE WAIT!  
ORE WA MATOYA NO HOGOSHA! DAME MO SHI! I AM MATOYA'S GUARDIAN! STOP OR DIE! (I'm a little unsure about this, my Japanese isn't anywhere near perfect)

See you next chapter,  
Shibaryou 


	3. The Gariland Magic Contest

Propositions  
Episode III: The Gariland Magic Contest -or- The Academy Revisited! Ai's Rival!  
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------  
Magic Contest!

Odine Magic and Occult Supplies Inc.  
is hosting this year's Magic Contest in Gariland.  
All Mages and Warriors accepted  
Hurry now before spaces fill up!  
The best magic show wins!

-Professor Mahoujin Odine XVII  
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

"Step right up ladies and gentlemen, get your own Magic Competition Coffee Mug! Come on, folks, while supplies last! 10 Gil each!" Cried a salesman in front of a large booth with a display of mugs on it, he held a bamboo cane in his right hand. A teenage warrior walked by, he held his cane in front of the teen, "Hold it right there son, you look like the kind of boy who could impress his friends with an official Gariland Magic Competition Coffee Mug."

The teen looked at the man, and then at a coffee mug, "Um... Do you have any blue ones?"

"Son, I've got every color of the rainbow! Of course I've got blue!"

"Osamu, get your butt over here so we can ENTER the competition!" A voice from in front of both Osamu and the man shouted.

"Sorry, Ai!" Osamu gave the man 10 Gil, "One light blue one, please!"

"Coming right up!" The man reached behind his stand and gave Osamu a light blue mug, "Thank you son, and have a nice day."

"Thanks!" Osamu took his mug and ran to Ai and Ken, who were waiting for him at the registration, "Sorry about th--"

"You actually wasted your money on one of those stupid mugs?" Ken asked, "It's just a stupid piece of blue clay that can barely hold water, let alone coffee!"

"W-well... I want to remember this event!" Osamu said, "Besides, it's the only souvenir I'll buy!"

"I bet you 200 Gil he'll buy a stupid t-shirt or visor next." Ai whispered to Ken, who just chuckled in response.

"Come on! Let's sign up!" Osamu said, putting his mug in his item pouch.

"Hold it," Ken said, "don't you know how this works? A representative of our group goes in and signs all of our names down."

"And that would be me!" Ai said, she looked at Osamu, "Hey, Osamu, what's the Kanji for your name? They require foreign spellings if applicable, but that might be for Samurai and Ninjas only. Better to be safe than sorry." She shrugged.

"Reign." Osamu replied.

"Do you know mine?" Ken asked.

"Yeah, don't worry about it." Ai told him, she went into the main building. She came out a few minutes later with a list, sighing in relief, "Thank God, I was the last person to enter before they stopped accepting people." She gave Ken the list, "Here, you're supposed to hang onto this. It's a list of representatives and team mates for the contest."

Ken scanned the list, "Let's see... Here we are... Ai Jou, Osamu Kishi and Ken Yumiya-- ...AI!" Ken's eyes widened in shock, "You... You used the wrong Kanji for my name!"

Ai looked at the list, "Why so I did..."

"YOU USED THE SYMBOL FOR DOG!"

Ai grinned evilly, "Oops!"

"Grrr...! My name is KEN, as in SWORD!" Ken glared at the smiling Priest, "SWORD, NOT DOG!"

"Ken, no-one's gonna notice!" Osamu said, trying to calm down his friend, "...You DID use the Kanji for reign, right, Ai?"

"Of course!" Ai pointed to Osamu's name on the list, "See, Osamu Kishi."

Osamu sighed in relief, Ken punched him in the shoulder, "Ow!"

"Don't be so relieved! I'M the one who's been named 'Dog' here!"

Osamu grinned, "...Woof."

"Oh, that's it...!" Ken almost tackled Osamu, if not for Ai grabbing him, and holding him back.

"Guys! Come on! Let's head to the Inn and rest!" Ai shouted, holding back the enraged Archer.

"Actually..." Osamu began, "Um... If it's all right with you guys, I wanted to stop by the Academy, just for old time's sake."

Ken stopped struggling against Ai's grip. "...Actually, that might be a good idea. I've wanted to see the place again for a while, it was like a second home to me."

"And it's where you learned to shoot an arrow without almost killing someone on YOUR side." Ai added, Ken glared at her.

"And we all met there, remember?" Osamu asked, Ai rolled her eyes.

"Yeah, Ken spilled his lunch all over me in the cafeteria that day... I thought I'd never forgive him!"

Ken spoke, "You didn't for at least two months!"

"Well, yeah, you dumped a taco covered in sauce on me!"

"Delita tripped me!"

"Let's just go!" Osamu shouted, before another fight broke out between the Archer and the Priest.

The Academy was on the other side of town. It was a huge building, with various fields around it. Students training their hardest to become fine warriors, most of them just Squires and Chemists, not yet choosing a profession, a few were dressed in Academy uniforms, showing that they still weren't sure if they wanted to train as a warrior, mage or both.

"Heh, still the same as before." Ken said, stepping into the main hall, looking at a trophy case, "Hey! Look! It's the trophy I won for the school at the All-Ivalice Academy Archery Contest! I'll never forget it!"

"You only won because someone accidentally bumped into you and you actually HIT the target!" Ai said, "You were probably going to miss, if Rad didn't bump into you."

Ken glared at Ai, "At least they got the trophy!"

"Hey, Osamu, look!" Ai pointed to a poster by the door, advertising for the Academy Prom, "Remember when you asked me to go to the Prom?"

Osamu began rubbing the back of his head, "Yeah, I think I still have a mark from your answer..."

Ken chuckled to himself, "I still can't believe you broke a plate over his head in the cafeteria."

"Why? I did it to you all the time!"

"Well, if it isn't Ai Jou, the Academy's most violent Priest ever."

Ai stiffened, she knew that voice, VERY well, "...You..." She turned, facing a Time Mage, with a Monk to her left and a Mediator to her right, "...Tokio?"

Tokio grinned, "That's right, Ai, it is I the great Tokio Yami." She snapped her fingers, a Monk standing next to her gave her a list, "Here you are," She read the list, "with... Osamu Kishi and," She did her best not to laugh, "...Fido."

"IT'S SWORD!" Ken shouted, glaring at Tokio.

"Oh, you Ken," Tokio smiled at him, "I'm sorry, I thought it was some other loser."

"Still as egotistical as ever, I see..." Osamu muttered.

Tokio smiled, "Still hanging around with losers? Really, ''Samu, you had such potential to be with me when we left, but, I guess when opportunity knocked, you weren't home."

"Shut up! Back in school all you did was hit on me! It was annoying and embarrassing!" Osamu shouted, glaring at Tokio, "And all you did was make fun of me and my friends!"

"...Isn't that what we do to each other?" Ken asked, Osamu ignored him.

"Oh well," Tokio looked to her left, "I got Honoo here to join me. He's been very big help in battle, right, Hon?"

The monk said nothing, just glared at Osamu.

"You'll have to excuse him, he's not much for conversation," The Mediator spoke, he extended his hand to Ken, "Sogeki Mono, the Team's sharp shooter, and you are...?"

"Ken Yumiya." Ken said, shaking Sogeki's hand.

Tokio glanced over to Sogeki, annoyed, "Sogeki, we're here on business, not pleasure. No making friends."

"S-Sorry, Tokio." Sogeki stepped back, sighing.

"What do you want with us anyhow!?" Ai asked.

Tokio laughed to herself, "Well, I saw that you were entering the Magic Contest, and I wanted to know just what you planned to do! This contest is judged by Audience approval, you know, so it has to be better than simple battle magic."

Ken and Osamu looked at each other, "...Uh-oh..." They both said in unison, neither of them were good with magic, let alone something more complex than battle magic.

"We've got something!" Ai told her, "What about you? You're not going to castle haste on the audience or something like that, right?"

Tokio glared at Ai, "Want to know!? Fine, allow us to give you a demonstration..." She looked over to Ken, "Rover, shoot an arrow at me!"

"Just for that dog joke," Ken loaded his crossbow, and aimed it, "With pleasure."

Tokio moved backwards, students in the surrounding area backed away, "...Shoot when ready."

Ken fired.

"Stop Bolt!" Tokio shouted, the arrow stopped in mid air, before being struck by lightning and falling to the ground in ashes. The surrounding students clapped their hands and cheered, Tokio took a bow, "I call it combining. I combined the 'Stop' spell and the 'Bolt' spell to freeze your arrow and strike it with lightning." She said to Ken, before turning to Ai, "Can you beat that, Ai?"

"We will." Ai said, confidently, "We've got the best magic act you've ever seen planned!"

"Are you going to saw ''Samu in half?" Tokio asked, mockingly. Osamu resisted the urge to draw out his sword and challenge her to a battle.

"Stop calling me that!"

Tokio turned to Sogeki and Honoo, "Let's go, boys." She turned back to Osamu, and blew him a kiss, "Good luck, 'Samu. You'll need it with her on your side!" She left.

Ai turned to Osamu and Ken, "Let's go." She sounded very angry, she left without saying another word. Ken and Osamu stood in the hall, a bit afraid to follow.

"Geez, Tokio hasn't changed at all..." Osamu muttered, "...Remember how she was always the popular girl in the Academy?"

Ken nodded, "Yeah, one of the best mages I knew. Looks like it's going to be a tough competition." Ken thought for a moment, "Hey! I just thought of something! Go find Ai and bring her here! I'll be right back!"

"What are you planning?"

"You'll see!" Ken ran off, down the halls.

Within fifteen minutes, Ai had been located and Ken had taken her and Osamu to the middle of the school's magic training field, which consisted mostly of large boulders and various target areas.

"What's going on, Ken?" Ai asked, impatiently as Ken put up wooden targets all over the field.

"Well," Ken started lifting a target, "When I was a student, I was good friends with the head of the Magic Department. I spoke to him, and explained our situation..." Ken finished putting up the target, "And he said we could use the field until the contest to practice," He leaned on the target, "What do you think?" The target fell over, "AAAIIIE!" Ken fell with it.

"Thank you, Ken..." Ai said, happily, "With this, we can practice our magic skills and come up with a good act! Right, Osamu?" Ai turned, and found Osamu placing his blue coffee mug on a boulder, "...What are you doing?"

"That combining thing that Tokio did gave me an idea..." Osamu took a Hi-Potion and an X-Potion out of his pocket, "What about items? I mean, just think about it! The X-Potion and Hi-Potion heal wounds, but, not all of them or really big ones! What if we combined them together?" Osamu poured the X-Potion into the mug, "Let's try it! We could great something like the O-Potion!" Osamu began to pour the Hi-Potion into the mug.

As soon as the first drop of Hi-Potion fell into the mug of X-Potion, the result was a huge pillar of fire. The heat could be felt from the Archery Class all the way across the school. The fire ball could be seen from the other side of Gariland, even far into the Mandalia plains.

After the fire ball burned out, Ai and Ken looked up from the boulder they hid behind, facing Osamu... Pitch black, charred clothing and smoke coming from all over his body.

"...And we pour that junk on our battle wounds?" Ken asked, looking at a Hi-Potion from his item pouch.

Ai spoke, "...We've GOT to find a way to work THAT into the show!" She paused for a moment, "...Osamu, your cape is on fire."

Osamu titled his head, his Knight's Cape was on fire, "...Why, so it is..." He promptly fainted from the blast.

Ai sighed, "Okay, we need to start some serious training... Ken, cast a revive spell on Osamu."

"What?! Why can't you?" Ken asked.

"Because, by nature, Warriors, especially ones like you, tend to suck at casting spells. Your training begins now."

"...Wait, what do you mean by 'warriors like you'?"

"Warriors who not only suck at magic, but, suck at fighting as well!"

"Grrrr..." Ken turned to Osamu, "...Revive!" A small Angel appeared over Osamu, like what was supposed to happen when Revive was cast, but, it did nothing, "...Well, revive him already!" Ken said, impatiently.

The Angel just shook its head.

"Well, do SOMETHING to wake him u-- HEY!" Ken shouted as the Angel dug through his pockets, "Get out of there, you cabbage patch reject!"

The Angel pulled a Phoenix Down out of Ken's pocket and dropped it on Osamu, waking him up from his unconscious state.

"...Well, you don't see THAT every day..." Ai muttered as the Angel vanished.

"Ugh... That's the last time I EVER mix potions..." Osamu muttered, he pulled an X-potion out of his item pouch and poured it over his head, his wounds began to heal as the liquid absorbed itself into his body.

"Okay, now, both of you need to start training for the Magic Contest." Ai said, smiling in a way similar to Vormav, "Now, we'll start with the basic fire magic..."

"...Can we work with something besides fire? My clothes are burnt enough as it is." Osamu lifted up part of his burnt cape.

"Fine, we'll work on..." Ai raised her hand, "Live... Know... Become a Frog... FROG!"

"Hey! Ai-- Kero! Kero!" Osamu's clothes lay in a heap, as he stood in the center of the pile as a frog, "Kero! Kero! Kero!" The frog glared at Ai.

"What? You'll probably get more dates looking like that!" Ken said as he crossed his arms, grinning. The frog jumped onto his face, "H-hey! Get off! OW! THAT HURTS!" Ken shouted, falling to the ground with the angered frog on his face, "Ai! Do something! OW!"

Ai pointed her finger at the frog, "Know... Live..."

The frog looked over at the pile of clothes, "KERO! KERO!" it hopped away from Ken.

"...Become a frog! Frog!" A green magic shot out of Ai's finger, Osamu (the frog) jumped out of the way, the spell barely missed Ken, instead hitting a rock, turning it into a small stone frog, like what one may find in gardens as decoration.

"Hey! Get back here! Frog!" Ai shouted, missing Osamu again and hitting one of the magic targets, turning it into a wooden carving of a frog.

"KERO! KERO! KERO!"

"FROG!" Ai screamed at the top of her lungs, hitting Osamu just as he dived behind a rock, "Osamu, what was THAT abo-- ..."

Osamu stood up from behind the rock, which covered him from the waist down, "...Ken, could you hand me my clothes?" Osamu glared at Ai, "The spell DOESN'T work on clothing, remember, Ai!?"

"...Sorry."

Ken gave Osamu his clothes and turned away, Ai did the same.

"Thank God no-one saw me..." Osamu mumbled, he dropped one of his gloves, "Darn..." He turned around...

...Only to face a group of new students who had just arrived at the school, staring at him in shock, "...WHAT?! Haven't you ever seen a guy naked behind a rock before?!?!?!"

"...Only one other time!" One student shouted, which earned him a large amount of stares from others nearby.

It took a few minutes, but, Osamu was finally dressed and the students had left

"Okay, now, we start with fire magic..." Ai pointed to a rock, "Destruction of nature! Gather in flame! Fire!" The rock lit on fire briefly, then went out.

"Okay, I can do this." Ken pointed at the rock, "Desecration of nature! Gather in flame! Fire!" Nothing happened, "...I don't get it..." Ken scratched his head.

"Uh... K-Ken..."

"Look at your..."

"What?" Ken said, "...Hey, is it getting hot out or is it just me?"

"Ken... YOUR HAIR!" Ai screamed, pointing at Ken's hair, which lit on fire when he began scratching his head.

"AAAAAIIIIIIIIEEEE!" Ken screamed, rolling around in the grass, "STOP DROP AND ROLL! STOP DROP AND ROLL!" He screamed over and over.

"...Osamu, your turn." Ai pointed to the rock, "Burn it!"

Osamu pointed at the rock, "Destruction of nature, gather in flame! FI-- KEN! LOOK OUT!" Osamu shouted as Ken rolled in the way of his spell.

"Ahhhhh!" Ken screamed as his shirt was lit on fire.

Osamu pointed at Ken, "Scatter your chilly sharp blades! Ice!"

A large block of ice formed over Ken and fell on him, putting out the flames.

"Ow..." Ken moaned.

Training continued like this for the next few hours. Ken and Osamu would somehow blast each other with their spells, while Ai occasionally threw in a cure spell. Eventually, they took a break so that Ai could think of a new way to train her partners.

Ai sat on a rock, while Ken and Osamu were using potions on their wounds from training.

"Ow... I didn't know you were so good with lightning magic..." Osamu moaned, pouring an X-potion on his arm.

"Look who's talking, with your ice spells..." Ken groaned, shaking snow out of his hair while pouring a Hi-Potion on his leg.

Ai began setting up targets, while the two warriors talked.

"Ow... You're a natural at ice magic..." Ken poured an X-potion on his arm.

"Guys, here's what you need to do!" Ai pointed at a target, Ken and Osamu got up, "What Ken said about Osamu's ice magic gave me an idea... Osamu, you cast an ice spell, creating an icicle, and Ken, you shoot it from your cross bow!"

"...What? Is that even POSSIBLE?!" Osamu asked, "I might be good at ice magic, but, make just an icicle?!"

"Try it!"

"But--"

"DO IT!"

"Yes, Ai!" Osamu shouted, he held his index finger straight up, pointing to the sky, "...ICE!" He shouted. Nothing happened, "...I said ICE!" Still nothing, "I don't get it-- ACK!" Osamu fell to the ground as two frozen birds fell onto of him.

"Okay... Point at a rock or something..." Ai suggested.

Osamu pointed at a rock, "...ICE!" A blue ray of light shot from his finger, creating a large icicle from his finger to the rock, "Yes! I-- STOP!" Osamu shouted, noticing the spell was still being cast, his hand covered in ice, "Stop it! Cancel! Someone cast silence!"

"FIRE!" Ken shouted, melting the ice, and stopping the spell, "...What was THAT about?"

"I don't know! It just... Came back at me!"

Ai looked at the rock, "...I see why..." She grinned, evilly, "This rock has Mica in it..."

"Mica?" Osamu asked.

"Remember back in magic class?" Ken asked, "Mica's a mineral found in some rocks and in large deposits in the ground. It's too thin to make armor out of, but, it's the only thing out there that can reflect ALL kinds of magic! Even the stuff the most powerful Reflect spells don't cover!"

"Thank God they can't make armor out of it!" Ai added, "I remember fighting a guy with a ring with a Mica stone on it, all he had to do was hold out his fist and my magic came right back at me!"

Osamu looked at the rock, "What can we do with Mica?"

Ai grinned, "The show is audience approval, right?"

Ken and Osamu nodded.

Ai rubbed the stone with one hand, loose Mica falling in the other, "...Why not throw in some 'fairy dust'?" Ai tossed the loose Mica in the air, she raised her hand, "Fire!" A small ball of flame flew from her hand, the flame hit the Mica, bouncing off one speck, shattering into smaller fire balls, and bouncing off many other small pieces that were floating to the ground. The end result was a beautiful dance of fire in midair until the spell eventually ended and the Mica fell to the ground.

"Whoah..." Osamu said in awe.

"Shiny..." Ken added.

Ai grinned, "...This could work! Tokio shows off skill, but, we can show off beauty!"

Ken and Osamu grinned as they began to rub Mica off the stone and performing the same feat with Ice and Lightning magic.

Ai then got an idea, "...Guys, get a huge handful of Mica, I've got an idea." Osamu and Ken nodded, rubbing more of the mineral off the stone, Ai did the same.

After a while, they stood facing each other, "Okay, on three toss the Mica in the air. I cast fire, Osamu casts ice and Ken casts lightning... One... Two... Three..." All three of them tossed it into the air, casting their spells into the fine dust.

The result was a beautiful explosion of flames, lightning and ice. The teens looked to each other, "...We found our act for the magic contest..." Ai said, grinning evilly.

"Wait..." Osamu thought for a moment, "...If this is judged by how the audience likes it, then we still have a problem."

"What's that?" Ai asked.

"Well... ...I dunno, it's really pretty, but..." Osamu tried to think, "...Most of the people I know REALLY like a show if there's some danger involved, like someone's life is on the line!"

Ai grinned, "Good idea, 'Samu..."

"Ai... You... You really scare me when you look at me like that..." Osamu stepped back, Ken grabbed him, "K-Ken!?"

Ai approached Osamu, an evil grin had spread across her face.

"S-STOP! DON'T! NOOOOO!"

The day of the contest had finally arrived...

Behind the stage, Ken and Ai watched the magic show. The acts weren't as good as they thought they'd be, the best show so far was a Summoner who taught Ifrit, Odin and Shiva to tap dance on stage.

Of course, those who worshipped those summoned monsters as Gods were greatly offended. The Summoner was hauled away by Chemists due to a concussion caused by a shoe to the head from one Shiva's followers.

The next best act was a wizard who juggled a fireball, a ball of lightning, and a ball of solid ice. The act ended as the Wizard tried to juggle a frog spell as well, and ended up turning himself into a frog.

Ai sighed, "There goes my hope that someone else would do better than Tokio before we did..."

"I think it'd be better if we out did her ourselves." Ken replied.

"Yeah, but, Osamu won't be to happy about it..." Ai motioned behind to a large blanket covering some sort of large structure.

"YOU TWO ARE SO DEAD FOR THIS!" Osamu screamed.

Ken tapped on the blanket, "Hey, you'll thank us for this one day!"

"WANNA BET?!?"

An announcer walked on stage, "And our next act is by Tokio Yami, Honoo Sekai and Sogeki Mono." He walked off stage as Tokio, Honoo and Sogeki walked on stage.

Tokio stood at the far right of the stage, Sogeki held a crossbow and stood at the far left.

Honoo nodded to both of them, and stepped back.

Sogeki shot the arrow.

"STOP! FIRE!" Tokio screamed. The arrow stopped in font of her and burst into flames.

The audience didn't seem too impressed.

"Come on! I've seen a Ninja do that with two daggers! He didn't even STOP the arrow!" One man shouted, "It was saw dust before it got close to him!"

"I've seen Squires catch arrows with one hand!" Shouted another person.

Honoo raised his fist, preparing to use a martial arts skill. Tokio stopped him, "Save it, these people wouldn't know a good act if it came up and cast a Death spell on them..."

Sogeki looked up to Tokio, "...I...I told you we should have done something else." Tokio hit him on the head, "Ow..."

"Shut up and move it!" Tokio screamed, walking off the stage, not before sending a sharp glare to Ai, who was watching back stage, "At least we'll get a good laugh before the day is out!"

Ai turned to Ken, "...Get him ready."

Ken grinned evilly as he began to push the mysterious covered structure towards the stage.

"Our last act, ladies and gentlemen, is by Ai Jou, Osamu Kishi and..." The announcer tried not to laugh, "...K..Ken Yumiya."

"IT'S SUPPOSED TO MEAN SWORD!" Ken shouted from back stage, he turned to Ai, "If you EVER do that with my name again, I will..."

"You'll WHAT?!" Ai shouted, glaring at Ken. A glare so sharp, it could break armor.

"N..Nothing! I'll just... change my name to the Kanji you use!" Ken replied.

Ai and Ken walked on stage with the mysterious covered object, "Today, we give you a show of beauty and a show of pure FEAR...AND DANGER!"

The audience didn't really react, except for two or three men in the front row who were interested in Ai...

"What you will see, is a BRAVE KNIGHT... Who's fate is unknown... Will he walk off stage alive or in PIECES!"

Now, THAT got the audience's attention, "BRING ON THE VIOLENCE!" Screamed one man from the back row.

"KILL THE KNIGHT! KILL THE KNIGHT! KILL THE KNIGHT!" The audience chanted.

Osamu's voice was heard from under the sheet, "...Guys, are they saying 'Kill The Knight'...?"

"No, they're saying um... 'Filled With Fright!' Yeah!" Ken whispered, "People are afraid you'll be hurt!"

Ai tore off the sheet, revealing a large metal cage, with Mica crystals lining the bars and large sheets scattered around the inside of the cage. On the top of the cage was a large bag with a rope attached to it, the end hanging outside the cage. Osamu stood in the center of the cage.

"Everyone, the brave Knight--"

"LET ME OUT! LET ME OUT OF HERE!" Osamu screamed, trying to break open the bar, "OSAMU WANTS OUT!"

"...Yes, BRAVE Knight..." Ai said, glaring at Osamu, "A Knight who shall look DEATH, that's right, DEATH, in the eye and LAUGH!"

"I WANT MY MOMMY!"

Ai and Ken stood next to the cage, "Due to the possibly graphic nature of what will go on in this cage," Ken began, "anyone with a weak stomach or heart conditions is advised to leave the room."

Osamu looked at Ken, "Th-This IS safe, right!? It only LOOKS dangerous... Right!? Am I right!?!?"

"Let's begin!" Ai shouted, ignoring Osamu, "Ken, prepare the Lightning Spell and pull the rope..." She raised her right hand, an ice spell began to form. She raised her left hand, a fire spell began to form.

Ken held his right hand in the air, a ball of lightning was hovering over it, "...3... 2... 1..."

Ken pulled the rope, Mica flakes fell out of the bag like smoke, filling up the entire cage.

Osamu's voice was heard in the cloud of Mica flakes, "O, Ajora in heaven please protect this cage and all who dwell within..."

"ICE! FIRE!" Ai shouted, shooting the spells into the cage.

"LIGHTNING!" Ken shot his spell into the cage.

"AAAHHHH! IT BURNS! AAAAAGGGGHHHH! IT'S COLD! ZZZZYYYYAAAAAHH! PAIN!" The cage shook violently as Osamu ran though the cloud of Mica, trying to escape. The cloud itself turning into a beautiful dance of fire, ice and lightning. The screaming was easy to ignore, "HELP ME!"

This continued for about seven more minutes, until the spells faded and the cloud dispersed.

Ai and Ken looked into the cage. Osamu had various large burns, smoking hair and clothing, burning clothes and he was unconscious on the floor and twitching.

"He's okay, folks!" Ken shouted to the audience, giving them two thumbs up to show he was fine.

The audience cheered loudly.

Back stage, Tokio and Honoo were just glaring at the team.

"...Sogeki, if you don't stop clapping like that, I'm going to cast meteor on you..." Tokio said, turning to the clapping Mediator.

"S-Sorry..." Sogeki hung his head.

The announcer walked on stage, "I think I know who won this year's magic contest!" He turned to Ai, "Ai Jou, on behalf of Odine Industries and Gariland Academy, I award your team with this Prize Money." He gave Ai a bag of Gil, "And I give you the first prize Treasure... This." The announcer walked back stage, and came out with a large red ball, "This is an ancient magical relic called the 'Red Materia', I award it to you." He gave Ken the Materia and shook his hand, "Congratulations."

The audience cheered as Ken and Ai walked off stage, Ken dragging the cage back stage.

The next day...

Osamu moaned as he lay in a bed at the local inn, he was covered in bandages. Ken was examining the 'Red Materia' they received as a prize. Ai was writing up a report for Ramza.

"Maybe I could get Alicia to look at it..." Ken muttered, spinning the red ball on his finger.

"Don't drop it and break it," Ai muttered, looking up from her report.

"Wouldn't matter, already did, it's durable," Ken tossed the materia in the air and caught it.

Osamu let out another moan. "Cure spell...Please..."

"After I finished this--" Ai was interrupted by a loud crash. "KEN!"

"Oops..." Ken muttered, looking at a mirror he had accidentally broken with the red materia. The materia, however, was still in one piece.

Osamu whimpered and painfully reached for some paper as Ai screamed at Ken.

To Be Continued...

------------------------------------------  
Job Report by Ai Jou

Gariland's Magic Association and Odine Magic And Occult Industries sponsors the yearly magic contest, the 'Gariland Memorial'.  
Many participants want to show off their magic  
We got to the final competition and faced the last opponent, a Time Mage named Tokio from Dorter.  
We beat her and managed to be this year's champions.

--------------------------------------------  
Ramza's Evaluation

Wow! I'm impressed by this one, except for the fact you almost killed Osamu. But, he should be all right after a few days. Good luck on your next job, I hope to hear more reports like this in the future!

-Ramza Beoulve

----------------------------------------------

A note from Osamu:

Given the events of the magic contest, I request that you hire a Chemist immediately. I can no longer trust my life to a Priest that would risk my life so needlessly. Sure, she's otherwise great, very strong holy spell, but Chemists are so versatile!

Also, on that Chemist note: Bows and arrows are so outdated, and Chemists I hear tend to be experts with guns. Guns are the future of long range warfare, you know...

-Osamu Kishi

--------------------------------------------

A reply from Ramza:

REQUEST DENIED.

--------------------------------------------

Notes: Bad Kanji joke, I know. On a related note, Sogeki Mono (the mediator) is Japanese for "Sniper." Anyone who remembers the Chemist\Mediator battles of Germinas Peak and the Beowulf should know how much of a pain they can be with guns...

The three new characters will most likely appear as rivals in later chapters, about when I haven't decided.

This chapter was a lot of fun to write, though it was hard to come up with a winning "act" for the show, sorry if it was a little disappointing.

In the original description of this job, Odine isn't mentioned at all, but I figured it would be a fun 'Brand Name' to use (like ShinRa) in the FFT world. Squall isn't going to show up any time soon, sorry folks.

See you next chapter,  
Shibaryou


	4. Testimony of Ex Miner

Propositions  
Episode IV: Testimony Of Ex-Miner -or- Gold And Silver! Ken And Osamu's Wealth!?

Finally, a vacation... Ramza was staying with his brothers in Lesalia for some time, leaving his allies and soldiers for hire some time to relax.

Which brings us to our heroes(?), Osamu Kishi, Ai Jou and Ken Yumiya, who were spending their vacation in Dorter, the two warriors getting plastered at the bar, while the Mage decided to spend her time at a near by Inn.

"I'm tellin' ya, Osamu!" Ken said, lifting his glass of ale, "This last job was a total success! We got some time off while Ramza stays with his brothers!"

Osamu held his arm in pain, "I still have marks from those spells..."

Ken grinned, "Hey! Bartender! Another round of ale over here!"

Osamu groaned, "Make that one ale and a pot of black tea..."

"Spike it!" Ken shouted.

Osamu winced in pain as he took his pot of tea from the bartender, "...I'll give you the fact that getting drunk would help me ignore the pain in my arm."

"Now you're talking!" Ken shouted, raising his glass, some of the ale spilling on to the bar counter and the floor.

"...Please don't be so loud." Said a quiet voice.

"Huh?" Ken turned to his left, finding that he spilled some of his ale on a middle aged man, "...Sorry, sir."

"It's all right..." The man sighed, "I'm sorry for bothering you."

Osamu sipped his tea, "What's wrong with you? You look upset..."

"...I was just thinking of the good 'ol days." The man replied, "Back in the time of the Gold Rush, Urubos Mountain was filled with miners with hopes and dreams... ...I'm just wondering whatever happened to it."

"You're a miner?" Osamu asked.

"One of the best, I made a fortune at Urubos about 20 years ago." He extended his hand, "I'm Kemia."

Osamu shook Kemia's hand, "Osamu Kishi."

Ken looked up, "My name's Ken Yumiya."

"Glad to meet you guys." The man smiled a little, "Warriors, right?"

"And mages, we just came back here after winning the Magic Contest last week!" Ken proudly stated.

"Amazing!" Kemia said, "I didn't think too many warriors could use magic."

"We're okay at it, Ai's the one who does most of the spell casting for us." Osamu said, sipping some of his tea.

Kemia smiled, "Hey, I've got an idea..." He reached into his travel bag, "I've always kept this with me for memories, but..." He pulled out a piece of paper and gave it to Osamu, "This is a map of the caves in Mount Urubos, it leads right to my old Gold Deposit." He looked into his glass of Ale, "...I'm not strong enough to dig for gold anymore, and I'm not sure if there's any left. If you two are interested, you can have the map. Make your own fortune."

"Are you serious!?" Osamu shouted, raising his arms in surprise, suddenly realizing his mistake, "AGH!" He screamed, slamming it down on the bar counter in pain, knocking over his tea cup, "Ow ow ow ow ow..."

"Thanks, Kemia. How can we repay you?"

"Strike it rich, my friend." He said, "...And tell me how things are back there. I left a lot of fond memories back in those mines."

"We'll tell you everything! I promise!" Osamu said, putting the map into his cape pocket.

"Thank you..." Kemia said, smiling a little, "I just wish I had the strength left to go myself..." He put some money on the counter for the bartender, "...Good luck."

"Thanks." Osamu said as Kemia left.

"...Osamu, do you realize what just happened?" Ken asked, a grin spreading across his face.

"A kind man asked us to visit a place in which important parts of his life took place because he cannot go there himself?"

"...That, but, there's something more important."

"...What?"

"We have a treasure map." Two Gil coins appeared in Ken's eyes, "We're gonna be RICH!"

Osamu sighed, "At least you have YOUR reason to go..." He poured himself another glass of tea, "...We'll tell Ai toni---AAIIEE!"

Ken grabbed Osamu by the arm, which made the knight thrash around in pain, "We'll tell her now! LET'S GO!"

"AGH! KEN! LET GO!" The archer let go, Osamu fell to the ground holding his arm in pain, "Itetetetete...That HURT Ken..."

Ken paid the bartender, "What did?"

"My arm, because of YOUR stupid magic act!"

"Whatever, let's just go!" Ken shouted, running out the bar, Osamu got up and followed.

"Ken, we're doing Kemia a favor, NOT going out to strike it rich!" Osamu shouted, running through the streets after Ken, dodging a chocobo wagon.

"Yeah, yeah, you do whatever you want! I'm gonna get me some gold!" Ken shouted, taking a turn down a street.

"The Inn isn't that way!"

"We're not going to find Ai!" Ken shouted, running into a mining supply store.

Osamu sighed, "...This is going to be a long trip." He said as he walked into the store, "...I'll go get Ai--" He turned to leave, until Ken grabbed his cape.

"No, no, no!" Ken shouted, "No Ai!"

"What?"

"Think about it, if we strike it rich...We'd have to divide it three ways, but, if Ai isn't there..."

"...Fifty-fifty..."

"Exactly, my friend!"

"...Sir, what is your best quality shovel?" Osamu asked the shopkeeper.

"Now you see it my way!" Ken said, grabbing a lantern.

The two warriors bought their mining supplies and went off, not telling Ai of their plans...

Of course, that night Ai waited at the inn for the two warriors...

"They aren't in the bar..." Ai said to herself, "Not in their room..." She groaned, "What kind of troubles did those two idiots get themselves into THIS time!?" She went to the innkeeper, "Are you SURE you didn't see an idiot Knight and an Idiot Archer come in at any time today?"

"Positive, those two haven't showed up all day!" The Innkeeper said.

Ai looked to the door, "I'm checking back at the bar, see you later tonight."

She walked through the streets keeping an eye out for her companions...

"Hey, babe..." Said a thief as she walked down the street, "You know, it's dangerous this time of night," He walked next to her, "something could happen to a pretty girl like yourse--AGH!" He fell back as Ai hit him in the face with her staff.

"Knock it off, you idiot. I'm not in the mood..."

"Ow...Ai! That HURT!" The thief shouted, "You really should have been a warrior..."

Ai groaned, "Rad, you are the most ANNOYING person I know... It's moments like this I'm glad Ramza puts me with Ken and Osamu whenever we're out on those bar jobs..."

"Hey, I'm sorry Ai..." Rad put his hand on the Priest's shoulder.

"You're gonna feel even MORE sorry if you don't get your hand off of me..." Ai warned. Rad immediately pulled his hand back, "...What are you doing here, anyway?"

"Ramza let me have some time off, too. He's got Alicia and Lavian over in Lesalia, though." Rad grinned. "I got lucky this time."

"Have you seen Ken or Osamu?"

"Not today." Rad said, "They're probably at the bar."

"...Probably." Is all Ai said.

"Why don't we look for them at the bar. I'll buy you a drink!"

Ai went on, "...All right, I might as well order there most expensive wine if you're paying."

"...Very funny, Ai." Rad shouted, following the Priest.

Ai and Rad entered the bar minutes later, not much conversation passed between them.

"...They're not here again! Darn them..." Ai muttered, sitting at the bar, looking to the bartender. "...Ale, lots of it."

"Glass of Vaccas Liquor, please." Rad said.

"Coming up." The bartender replied, getting the drinks.

Ai looked around the bar, "Those idiots... Probably got drunk and fell into a river..."

"They could be fighting some monsters in Sweegy Woods." Rad suggested.

"Nah, no-one's stupid enough to go there at night." Ai said as the bartender gave her ale.

"I saw the two biggest idiots today!" Declared a man at a table.

Ai and Rad listened closely, they knew of two warriors who fit that description.

"What'd they do?" Asked one of his friends.

"They came into my store, with a map of the Mount. Urubos Mines, some Archer and a Knight!" Bingo. "Everyone knows those mines have been empty for years! But, today, I made more money on them buying my mining supplies than I do in most weeks!" The man laughed, then taking a gulp of his ale.

Ai groaned, "...I'll be right back." She walked over to the man, tapped his shoulder.

"Huh?"

Ai grabbed his collar, pulling him close, "...Which way to the Urubos Mines?"

"F...Five sectas...East of Sweegy Woods...!" Ai pushed the man back onto the table, knocking over food and drinks.

"...Rad, let's go."

Rad downed the rest of his drink and paid the barkeeper, "Coming!"

Ai marched through the street, Rad following closely, "Those IDIOTS! I'm going to kill them this time!" She screamed.

"C-Calm down!" Said Rad as Ai kicked a bottle a good 20 feet into the air.

"ICE!!!!" Ai screamed, the spell shattering the bottle as it began to fall back to the ground.

Meanwhile...

Ken and Osamu had just reached the base of the mountain. Osamu suddenly stopped.

"...What's wrong?"

"All of a sudden a chill ran down my spine..." Osamu said, "...Probably just the night air."

"Yeah, it gets pretty cold when you get close to Goland." Ken sat down on a near by boulder, "...I can feel it, Osamu! GOLD! And lots of it!"

"I can see it now... We'll go back, sell it all and spend it on things for ourselves! I can get a custom sheath and hilt for the Blood Sword!" Osamu said, excitedly.

"Or you can get a NEW sword that you can actually USE in battle." Ken said, "Osamu, they've got better swords on the market, the Blood Sword is OLD."

"This sword is special, Ken! I just know it! One day, I'll save the world and this sword will be an ancients message to future generations..."

"...What message? Osamu saved the world with a stupid sword and a lot of luck."

"No, it'll be 'Don't mess with the Kishi family!'"

"...I see..." Ken sighed, "I know of Daggers they were selling at the weapon shop that do more damage..."

"...Let's just go and make our fortune..." Osamu said.

"Nah, it's way too late, I say we find a place to rest." Ken looked around the area, "Hey! A town! We should check out their Inn!"

"All right, let's go!" Osamu started walking towards the town.

Ai and Rad were already on the way to the Mountain on chocobo.

"I said I'd buy you a drink!" Rad said, "Not rent a chocobo!"

"I don't care, Rad!" Ai replied as they raced through the forest, "Osamu and Ken are going to pay for this!"

"Why?"

"Because they probably left like that to avoid giving ME a share of any gold they find, and for wasting their money on mining equipment!" Ai's chocobo began to run faster, "I'm going to find them and make them sorry for leaving me behind and worrying me as well!"

"You were WORRIED about those two?!" Rad shouted, "I thought you hated them!"

"How would I explain to Ramza that I LOST those two? Besides, it's better being stuck with them than it is you!"

"...Just what's THAT supposed to mean?"

"Let's keep going. Faster chocobo!" Ai said, making her chocobo run even faster.

"Wait up!" Rad shouted, catching up to Ai.

Back at the town, Osamu and Ken had made a discovery...

"It's empty..." Osamu said, looking in a house, "It's a ghost town!"

"Probably because of the gold rush..." Ken muttered, looking at the Inn, "We'd better sleep outside, these buildings look like they can fall at any minute."

"Nah! This is as sturdy as the day it was built!" Osamu hit a beam on the outside of the Inn with his hand, "See?"

With that, the inn collapsed, knocking over a building next to it, which knocked over a building next to it. Like dominos the buildings fell around them.

Ken looked at the damage in awe, "...Now that's something you don't see everyday."

"...Shall I find a soft patch of grass for us to sleep on?" Osamu asked.

"Unless you want to try and dig a couple of the Inn's beds out of that rubble." Ken pointed to the remains of the Inn.

Osamu began to dig through the rubble, "Not a bad idea!" He began to lift up a large board, "AGH!" He held his arm in pain, "...Looks like I'll need some help."

Ken groaned, "Great, I was hoping to get away from working for at least a week..."

Little more than a secta away...

Ai and Rad had stopped at a stream to let their chocobos rest.

"They're close..." Ai said, "...I can smell the Ale that's still on their breath."

Rad sniffed the air, "...Smells more like pine."

Ai sat by a tree, "I can't believe they tried to ditch me like that...The least they could have done was have written me a note with a dumb excuse."

"Nah, I tried that with Alicia and Lavian when I wanted to go to Goland for a bar proposition. They found me the next day...Of course, that could have been because they took up the job, too, and left a note with a bad excuse for me, too." Rad said. Ai hit him in the shoulder, "Ow..."

"Idiot..." She muttered, "Thank God those two served under Agrias, you're living proof of what serving Gafgarion can do to the mind."

"Hey! I'm not proud of helping him, either! And Ramza was his right hand man, too!" Rad shouted, "I just...worked with him longer..."

"Exactly!"

Rad lowered his head, "...Ouch, Ai."

"...Sorry, I guess I'm just a little upset because Ken and Osamu."

"...I think that's the first time you ever referred to them without saying 'idiot.'"

Ai looked up at the sky, "...Rad, go back over to Gariland, I'll finish the rest."

Rad knew what Ai meant. She was probably going to beat Osamu and Ken to a bloody pulp for what they did to her, "...I'll stick around. I want to see what happens."

"You sure? This isn't cutting into your vacation time?" Ai asked.

"Not too much. Besides, I'll take Osamu, you take Ken." Rad said, an evil grin spreading across his face.

Ai walked to her chocobo, "...Let's go." She said, grinning just as evilly as Rad.

The Thief and the Priest rode into the night, each knowing the other's plans to punish Osamu and Ken.

They finally came to the mountain, "...No signs they went up the mountain..." Ai said to herself, she looked around the area, finally seeing the destroyed town, "...Bingo."

"Geez, what happened there?" Rad said to no-one in particular as he and Ai rode to the remains.

"...Ajora, you MUST be kidding me..." Ai muttered under her breath.

"What? What's goin--...What the...?" Rad looked at the remains of the Inn strangely, they had been torn apart, probably after the collapse...

...And a trail of rubble led down the street, until it stopped at two beds, placed next to the remains of the bar, which were also torn apart. That trail of rubble led back to the beds...Which contained two sleeping warriors and various emptied liquor bottles.

Ai got off of her Chocobo, raising her staff into the air, "...Sorry, Rad, but, both of them are mine this time."

"Why?"

"...Because some of that stuff is Vaccas Liquor, and they probably drank all of it." Ai raised her staff in the air.

Rad cringed as the sounds of a War Cry and various smashing was heard, the breaking of glass, bending of metal bed frames and screams of two warriors echoed through the night.

"A-Ai!?"

"H...How'd you get here?"

"THIS IS FOR DITCHING ME!"

A crash was heard as Ai hit both of the Warriors over the head with her staff at once. The two warriors fell to the ground, "...Ow..." They both said in unison.

Ai reached into Osamu's cape pocket and took the map, "...So, this is the legendary treasure map...You guys do know one thing about this place, right?"

"...That the residents of this town left here in a hurry?" Ken asked.

"No..." Ai held the map behind her, Rad took it and backed off in fear, "Because the reason everyone left is because of one thing, being the fact that you would have a BETTER chance of finding gold by digging in Zeklaus Desert!"

"But, Zeklaus doesn't have...any...gold..." Osamu finished, "...We were tricked, Ken."

"...Get my crossbow, Kemia's dead."

"Kemia?" Ai asked.

"The guy who gave us the map! It leads to where he struck it rich when he was a miner there." Osamu explained, "He told us to check on the mountain for him and to try to dig for our own fortunes if we wanted."

Ai sighed, "You idiots fell for a scam like THAT?!"

"Wait! Ai!" Rad shouted, looking at the map, "...There's something different about this map?"

"What do you mean?" Ai asked.

Rad held up a second map, he knelt to the ground, "Come here, this Kemia guy might have been right after all!"

Osamu, Ken and Ai surrounded Rad, "What do you mean?" Ken asked, "The mountain's empty, isn't it?"

Rad pointed to the first map, "I was going to come here tomorrow to explore the mines with this map a mining shop was offering. It's all of the known mine shafts in the mountain." Rad pointed to the next map, "But, this one has an extra path that isn't shown in this map."

"...Meaning...?" Ai asked.

"I think it means that Kemia found a secret path, or something like that."

Ai, Osamu and Ken blinked, then exchanged glances. Ai grabbed Kemia's map, while Osamu and Ken grabbed Rad, "TO THE GOLD!" All three shouted.

"Hey!" Rad shouted as Osamu and Ken dragged him towards the mountain.

The trip took under an hour, as they reached the entrance to the mines.

"Okay, Rad, navigate for us!" Ai said, giving Rad Kemia's map.

Rad entered the cave, Osamu and Ken turned on a couple of lanterns for light, "...All right, we go this way until we hit a dead end." He walked to the right.

The cave was dark and a little damp, but, it didn't bother any of them, they knew what was waiting at the end of Kemia's map.

Rad stopped, "According to Kemia's map, there's supposed to be a turn around here...It's probably hidden, the turn is cut off from here by a dotted line, everyone start looking!"

Ai knocked on the dirt around the area with her staff, while Rad poked his dagger deep into the dirt, Osamu and Ken dug on a couple walls, Osamu occasionally shouting because of his arm.

"I don't see anything..." Ai said, she walked next to Rad, "Are you sure it's here?"

Osamu and Ken circled Rad as well, "Yeah, it's solid dirt all around here--" Osamu stopped speaking, "...Do you guys feel that?"

"Feel what?" Rad asked.

"It feels like we're sinking--" Suddenly a loud snap was heard. The ground beneath the group collapsed, they fell down a deep tunnel, ending up in a strange room, decorated with Crystals, giving off a faint glow.

"...Guys, does this look familiar to you?" Ai asked.

"...It can't be..." Osamu said, "Kemia's mine...Is part of..."

"...Okay, let's be very quiet," Ken whispered, "We'll just take the gold and leave. 'It' won't even know we were here."

"It?" Rad asked.

"...This might be a part of Matoya's cave." Osamu explained, "...We ran into some trouble here."

"_Ore no ka?_"

"...I think it found us." Ai said, knowing the voice behind her, she turned and found the turtle...Matoya's guardian turtle... Facing them, glaring.

"_Nani? Omaetachi futataberu ka!?_" It shouted, this time not attacking them like before.

"...Hi?" Ken smiled nervously at the turtle.

"_SHI NE!_"

"RUN!" Ai screamed. The chase was on again, this time the turtle was even faster, even tearing off parts of Osamu's cape as they ran.

"Rad, is THIS place on the map?" Osamu asked.

"Yeah! This must be where Kemia found his gold!" Rad shouted, "His mine must have actually been an extension of Matoya's cave!"

"Okay, there should be an exit around here somewhere!" Rad studied the map, "We'll come to a fork, take the right path!"

"Got it!" Ai, Ken and Osamu shouted. The fork came up a minute after Rad warned them, they took the right path. The turtle took the left.

Rad stopped, as well as the others, "...We're safe..."

Osamu caught his breath, "Why wouldn't...it follow us?"

"I'm not sure... But, there's a mine shaft this way...It's probably Kemia's..." Rad pointed down the tunnel, "This way..."

They wandered down the tunnel, the finally reached a turn.

"...Osamu the flame in your lantern's too dim, could you make it brighter?" Ai asked.

Osamu did so, the light suddenly reflected off of something...A metal.

"...Is that...?"

"...It's mythril." Rad said, "This must be how Kemia did it...Mythril isn't as precious as gold, but, a lot of it can make an easy fortune!"

"LET'S DIG!" Osamu and Ken shouted, lifting up their shovels, Osamu screaming in pain. Ai grabbed his shovel, and started to dig.

"...Thanks, Ai."

"Shut up and take off your cape."

"What?!"

"We need something to carry this stuff home in!" Ai said. Osamu took off his Knight's cape and put in on the ground. The other three began to pile Mythril ore onto the cape.

"We're practically picking this stuff off the ground!" Ai shouted, excitedly.

Eventually, the couldn't pile any more on without being able to close the cape.

"...All right, let's go!" Rad said, "The exit is down this way--"

"_MATTE!_"

"...Oh, God..." Ai muttered, "Rad, RUN down there and lead us to the exit!" She screamed.

Rad ran, Osamu and Ken followed, carrying the Mythril, Ai followed. The turtle not too far behind.

"HERE! Just get ready to JUMP!" Rad shouted, pointing a tunnel, the morning light coming from it.

"WHAT?!"

Rad jumped, "WHOOOAAAAAAAH!!!"

Ai followed, "EEEEEK!!!"

Osamu and Ken next, "AAAAAAAAAH!!!"

The Turtle stopped at the end of the cave, watching the group slide down the mountain, letting out a low growl. It turned and want back into the cave.

The group ended up at the bottom of the mountain, not hurt too badly.

"Ow...My neck..." Ken muttered.

"My back..." Ai groaned.

"Agh...My arm..." Osamu moaned.

"My entire body...GET OFFA ME!" Rad shouted, on the bottom of the pile of warriors.

"...Sorry." The others said.

"...It's all right. Let's head back to Gariland." Rad said, "You guys walk with the Mythril, we'll take our chocobos."

"...But, it's heeeeaaaavy..." Ken whined.

"We don't caaaaaaare." Ai said, walking back to the destroyed town with Rad, "You guys get a head start, we'll catch up."

Osamu and Ken exchanged glances and sighed, "At least we'll get some money out of this..."

Back at Gariland...The Mythril was taken to be exchanged into Gil.

"...Looks like you fell for it, too." A man told them, looking at the mythril, "This isn't real Mythril. It's Fool's Mythril. People head over to that mountain all the time and bring back loads of it!"

"...It's...Not.. real...?" Osamu asked.

"Nope, it's worth about an eight of the price of Mythril, though..." The man gave them some money, "Here you go, 970 Gil."

Rad and Ai glared at Ken and Osamu who backed away slowly... Then took off running as the Thief and the Priest chased after them.

"JUST WAIT UNTIL RAMZA HEARS ABOUT THIS!!" Ai shouted, pulling out pieces of paper and a feather pen.

To be continued...

----------------------------------  
Job Report by Ai Jou

Mt. Urvos... Mining towns and people were plentiful here during the Gold  
Rush, years back. But after the ore ran out, all 15 towns in the area were  
deserted. Now its history is washed away by the tears of a middle-aged,  
ex-miner at the bar...

---------------------------------  
Ramza's Evaluation

Thanks guys, I just NEEDED to hear about this while spending time with my family... From what Ai told me, you guys really messed up on this one. I'm in a good mood today, so I'll refund your money for the mining supplies, but, don't do this again...

We need to head to Orbonne, by the way. Try to get there ASAP, I'm sending Alicia and Lavian ahead to meet up with you.

---------------------------------  
A note from Rad...

Ramza,

I said it before and I'll say it again:  
Where'd you find these guys?

---------------------------------  
Ramza's reply:

Gariland Academy.

_Not much to say abut this one, I could somehow see those two falling for a con like that... _

This chapter marks the first appearance of Rad in the series. I like to make him a thief in the game, he seems to work well in that position...

See you next chapter,  
Shibaryou


	5. Stolen Ancient Writings

Propositions  
Episode V: Stolen Ancient Writings -or- Master Thief! Zero's Grand Entrance!

-----------------------------------------------------  
**REWARD**  
**A thief has stolen Ancient Writings from the  
Gariland University of Magic.  
10,000 Gil reward is offered to  
anyone who can find the Ancient Writings  
or the location of the Thief**  
------------------------------------------------------

"Tell me this isn't happening..." Osamu mumbled as he, Rad, Alicia, Lavian, Ai and Ken waited at the gates of Gariland.

"Ramza needs us in Orbonne!" Rad shouted at a guard at the gate, "We NEED to leave here!"

"Sorry, but, until further notice, no-one can leave the city!" The guard replied, "You did hear about what happened last night, didn't you?"

"What?" Lavian, the Knight, asked, tapping on her sword sheath impatiently.

"Some thief robbed the Gariland Academy of Magic. The mayor ordered that no-one enters or exits the city, except by ferry. Huge security checks at the ferry docks, too. The guards over there have a right to inspect your travel bags and everything." He guard crossed his arms, "Trust me, I don't enjoy this much, either. I was on vacation until this happened."

"Gariland Academy of Magic?" Ai asked, "I went there until I transferred to the military academy. What writings were stolen?"

"Really ancient spells, like the legendary Ultima and a few summon chants." The guard said, "That's what I've heard, anyway."

Ai turned to the others, "I say we head back to the Inn."

Alicia, the Oracle, sighed as she began to walk to the Inn with her staff as a walking stick, "Great, this is just what I needed...Ramza's going to be so mad at us for being late."

Rad leaned against the wall of the gates to the city, "So, everything's blocked?"

"Yeah, sorry, pal..." The guard replied, "As soon as someone at least gets the thief, we can let people back in and out of the city."

"It's all right, I guess this just gives us extra vacation time..." He looked over to the chocobo stables down the left path from the gate, "Though, now it'll cost us extra to have our chocobos kept there..."

"Well, at least you're still on vacation. I had this great trip to Lesalia planned, but, then this happened and all guards were put on duty." The guard hit the wall, "If I find this guy, I'll run him through."

"You just read my mind, buddy." Rad drew out his Platinum dagger, thrusting it forward like he was stabbing the thief, he sheathed it and turned to leave, "See ya later. If I find the guy, I'll bring him to you."

"Bye, I hope you find him..." The guard muttered.

The warriors had decided to go to the bar to try and pass the time, while Alicia and Ai went to find out more about the robbery.

Rad was telling the others a story, "I remember that battle like it was yesterday!" He said, "We were fighting Gafgarion at Zirekile falls, I was fighting him one on one on the rope bridge, he was screaming 'Traitor! I'll kill you for joining Ramza!' at the top of his lungs, and that's when I did it..."

"Did what?" Osamu asked, yawning and not believing a word of the story.

"He chased me to the end, I cut the ropes on the end of the bridge and he fell! SPLASH! And that's how I beat him!" Rad took a proud drink of his ale.

Lavian grinned evilly, "That's not quite how I remember it.."

"What?" Rad said, nervously, "It..It is how it happened!"

"No," She said, sipping her Vaccas Liquor, "You DID cut the bridge... ...ONLY with Ramza and yourself on it as well."

"It was his fault! He tried to go in to stop him when I started to cut the bridge!" Rad said, "He shouldn't have tried to fight Gafgarion! I had it all under control!"

"You were screaming, 'Oh God, please don't kill me! I just can't stand your ego or your ugly mustache any more!'" Lavian said, Osamu and Ken laughed, Ken almost spitting out some of his ale while laughing.

"...Well, it was an ugly mustache..." Rad mumbled, putting down his glass.

Osamu poured himself another cup of black tea, "Hey, I've been doing some thinking..."

"Does your head hurt?" Ken asked, getting an elbow in the side from Osamu.

"How about we try to find this thief? We could get clues, ask witnesses and everything! We're also warriors, we can take on anyone!" Osamu announced.

"Yeah! Two Knights, an Archer and a Thief can take down anyone!" Rad added, "We're unstoppable!"

The sound of someone clearing their throat was heard, "Aren't you forgetting US?"

Rad paused, "...Ai!" He said, getting up turning to the glaring mage, "Of course you help make us unstoppable--"

"Can I have your ale?" Ai asked, calmly.

Rad nodded, giving Ai his glass of ale.

"Thank you." Ai said, taking Rad's hat off and pouring the ale onto his head, she put the glass on the table and tossed the hat to Rad, "Sit down, we've got an update on what's happened." Rad sat, down, Alicia sat next to him while Ai sat between Ken and Osamu, "Here's what I've heard. The thief stole all of it just before sun rise, and no-one has entered or left the town since the robbery, so he's still here. He was in his early thirties, and was last seen leaping out of a second story window and limping away."

"So, he's got a limp from the fall..." Osamu said, "Think he'll take a ferry out of town?"

Alicia spoke, "That's what we're thinking...But, there's a problem there."

"What?" Ken asked.

"The security checks, they're strip searching everyone."

Immediately Ken, Osamu, Rad and Lavian's eyes widened, "HOLY AJORA!"

"That's what we said..." Ai continued her explanation, "But, there's a Luxury boat that leaves this afternoon..."

"...And because it's privately owned, the town isn't ordering it to provide security checks." Alicia added, "We know the thief is going on that boat, it's a cruise boat that's going to Warjilis."

"A perfect escape..." Osamu muttered, "Looks like we're stuck here until they finally realize the thief got away..."

"Not quite." Ai held up some tickets, "We bought six tickets, one for each of us to go on the cruise and catch the thief."

Osamu took one of the tickets, "I..It's real! How could you afford this?!"

"Well..." Alicia turned away, nervously.

Ai looked away, "...We kind of...had to..."

Ken, Rad, Alicia and Osamu glared, "...You didn't..." They all said at once.

"...We kind of...hadtoborrowmoneyfromyouguys." She mumbled as quickly as she could.

Osamu drew out the Blood Sword, Ken drew out his crossbow, Lavian unsheathed her sword and Rad swiftly held his dagger up. The patrons of the bar gasped as the group of four glared at Ai and Alicia with their weapons drawn...

"That was the last of my money!" Lavian screamed.

Osamu held up a sheath in one hand, which was falling apart, "I was going to buy a custom sheath with that money!"

"I wanted to buy a nice dinner with my money!" Ken shouted, reaching for an arrow.

"...You wouldn't TRY it..." Ai glared, raising her hands into the air, "Bright light, shine down on bloody impurity...HOLY!"

A loud explosion was heard outside of the bar as a bright light burst through the roof of the bar from the inside, throwing two knights, a thief and an archer into the air, screaming at full volume.

Alicia looked at the hole in the roof of the bar, and sighed, "...Think you might have killed one of them?"

"Think? I'm HOPING I at least got Ken."

Ken was the first to land, smashing a table, charred and black, "...Wow, if I knew Holy could do that, I wouldn't have skipped church so much..."

Ai sighed, "One can only hope..."

Osamu, Lavian and Rad landed somewhere around the bar, after receiving a phoenix down and a few X-Potions, they headed to the docks.

"That's it, the SS Yagami." Alicia pointed to the large ship. Ken, Osamu and Rad's eyes lit up immediately.

Rad began to drool at the thought of sailing on it, "Wow...A trip to Warjilis on that thing..."

Ai sighed, "Knock it off, Rad, this is to catch a thief."

"...Is there a buffet?" Lavian asked.

"Yes, there i--" With that Lavian was gone, already on the ship. Ai turned to the remaining warriors, "Remember do your best to look casual, we can't let anyone know we're looking for the--" Ai groaned as she realized Ken was already going about, asking people if they knew who the thief was.

"...I'm afraid I don't know." Said one man, he wore a black coat and a green shirt underneath, as well as a black hat on his head and a cane in his right hand, "I just arrived here last night."

"If you hear anythi-- ACK!" Ken was pulled back by Ai.

"Sorry, sir, he just wants to play detective..." Ai muttered, dragging Ken onto the ship.

"It's quite all right!" The man said, "I'd be more than happy to help if I knew anything." He picked up a travel bag by his side and walked onto the ship.

"What was that for Ai!? He--"

"Ken, we're NOT supposed to go around asking people like this!" Ai whispered, "We can't make people realize we're looking for the thief! This person is probably very dangerous!"

"We took on Gafgarion--"

"And remember when he almost cut your arm off?!"

"...It was a lucky shot..." Ken muttered, "Besides, Mustadio saved me, remember?"

"Only because he broke his sword before he cut past your tunic!" Ai sighed.

"...Touche..." Ken muttered, turning away walking onto the ship, "At least we'll be able to spend time in Warjilis after this..."

"I just hope we get back before Ramza continues his quest." Ai said, "He'll be pretty upset if we aren't back on time..."

It took little time for Ai and Ken to find Osamu and Lavian, both were at a small buffet on the ship, their plates filled with fruit and chocobo meat.

Ai groaned, "We're NOT going to find the thief here..."

Osamu swallowed his Chocobo meat, "Thieves have to eat, too, don't they?" He continued eating.

"His logic works for me!" Lavian added, pulling apart a pomegranate.

"This proves my theory..." Ai muttered.

"What theory?" Ken asked.

"All knights have brains located in their stomachs."

Osamu and Lavian glared. Lavian tossed a pomegranate seed at Ai, "Very funny." She muttered.

Ai turned to Ken, "Let's try to find Rad and Alicia. They might be doing what they're supposed to and looking for that thief."

Ken nodded.

Osamu waved, "See you guys later, we'll keep a look out for anyone suspicious at the buffet!"

"Then I say we check out the bar, all sorts of suspicious people can be found at a bar!" Lavian added.

"And it gives you two a good excuse to drink!" Ai shouted as she left.

"...Well, we can't help it if thieves hang out in the same places we eat and drink at, can we?" Lavian asked Osamu, innocently.

"Of course not! If anything, our search will have the best results!" Osamu replied, before peeling a banana.

On the other end of the ship...

Rad was walking through a crowd of people, he bumped into one man, "Sorry!"

"Watch it!" The man shouted continuing on his way.

Rad laughed to himself, turning a corner, he reached into his pocket, producing a wallet, "Oh, how I love being a thief..." He began to count the money, "Twenty gil?! That's IT!?" He continued looking, "A passport in the name of Vormav Tingel... And a candy wrapper." Rad sighed and tossed the wallet aside.

He sighed to himself, but immediately saw stars as a sudden blow to the back of the head, he fell forward, "Ow!" He looked up, facing Ai and Ken, "What was THAT for?!"

"We're LOOKING for a thief, not acting like a thief." Ai said, motioning to the wallet.

"...Well, pardon me if I wanted to have some FUN on this cruise!" Rad replied, "It's easier than battle, too! At least with these people I don't have to defend against weapons and magic."

Ai glared, "And it also makes YOU look like the thief!"

"...Not unless I'm caught!" Rad replied, "Besides, I might end up stealing back the Ancient scrolls!"

"I doubt it..." Ai muttered. Ken walked up behind her.

"No sign of Alicia, she might be below deck." He said.

"Oh, she's at the bar." Rad said, getting up, "She's asking the bartender if he's seen anything."

Ai groaned, "We're supposed be acting like we're not looking for the thief!"

"At least she'll be doing a better job than Lavian and Osamu." Ken stated.

"Not much, that's where they planned to go next." Ai replied, "But then again, they won't be asking the bartender for anything except drink orders..."

Rad grinned, "Well, perhaps you'll find the thief below deck or something."

Ken nodded, "I'll check below deck, all right?"

"Fine." Ai replied, she turned to Rad, "As for you..." She grabbed him by the arm, and dragged him across the deck of the ship, "You're going to look for the thief, and I'm making sure you stay out of trouble doing it!"

"H-HEY!" Rad shouted as Ai dragged him, "No fair!"

Ken just laughed as he went down to the bar to check on Osamu, Alicia and Lavian.

The two Knights and Oracle were sitting together at one table, drinking ales and talking amongst themselves. They paused when Ken joined them minutes later.

"Any luck, guys?" Ken asked.

"We were going to ask everyone if they've seen anyone suspicious." Alicia began.

"..And?" Ken asked.

"...Everyone here IS suspicious." Osamu motioned around the room. It was true, the room was full of people who looked like they did it, or at least did something illegal. Thieves with eye patches and scars, mages with swords instead of staves or rods, even one summoner missing two fingers on one hand. All of them drinking ale and other drinks, some even passed out drunk on the floor.

"Well, not the bartender..." Ken suddenly took back that statement as a dagger with a note through it wedged itself into the table, the bartender being the one who threw it, "...Eep..."

Osamu pulled the dagger out of the table, "It's our drink bill." He pulled a feather pen out of his cape and wrote something on the back of the bill, he placed it back on the dagger and threw it at the bartender, it wedged itself into a wall a few feet from him. The bartender read the note.

"...Round of ale at table three!" The bartender shouted to a waitress.

Ken looked at the other three in surprise, "...Is that the first time he's done that?"

Alicia grinned, "Nah, he does that to us about every hour."

"Takes you by surprise the first couple times, though!" Lavian said as a waitress began to hand them their drinks.

The group began to talk about other places the thief could be...Until they heard the door to the bar open.

In stepped Ai, looking relatively calm, she sat at the table. A dagger with a note landed in front of her, she looked at the note, "'What do you want to drink?' ...Anyone got a pen?" Osamu handed her his feather pen, she wrote a reply and threw it back the bartender.

"One bottle of Vaccas Liquor!" He shouted to a waitress.

The group looked nervous, expect Ai to yell at them, "...Hi, Ai..." Osamu said, breaking the silence.

"...My common sense is telling me that this ship is made out of wood, therefore blasting any of you with a flare spell or a lightning spell would burn this place down...Therefore, if you can't beat 'em, join 'em."

The group sighed in relief. They continued talking, Ai joined in the conversation after a few minutes.

Meanwhile... On the top deck of the ship.

Few people were left on the top deck, the area Rad was on anyway. Only one other person, a man in a black suit, green shirt and a black hat. Rad bumped into him, "Sorry, si--" Rad was cut off by an elbow in the stomach, followed by the back of a fist in the face, he began to fall back before the man grabbed his hand, taking back a wallet, he tossed Rad aside and continued walking.

Rad moaned, "What...happened...?" He looked in the direction the man walked away in. There was a piece of paper on the ground, Rad picked it up. It was written in a strange language, "..Wait a second, these are the symbols...spells are written in..." He whispered to himself.

He heard footsteps approaching, it was the man again, Rad noticed he had a cane in hand, "Y...You dropped this..." He held up the paper, the man immediately grabbed it and placed it in his pocket.

"...Kid, you shouldn't touch things that don't belong to you." The man glared, "...It might not be good for your health." He raised the cane into the air, Rad rolled out of the way just as it came to the ground, cracking the floorboard it hit, "...Nice reflexes."

Below, in the bar, everyone (except those who were passed out drunk) was staring at the ceiling, after hearing a strange cracking noise from above.

Most of the patrons went back to drinking, but one table (which was relatively sober) decided to investigate.

"You guys check it out first, I'll pay." Osamu said, getting up and turning to the bartender, pausing as a dagger flew through his cape, tearing a rather large hole, and wedging itself into the table, "...Thanks!" He said, taking the bill from the dagger as the others ran up to the top deck to see what happened.

Lavian was the first to make it to the top deck, she drew out her sword immediately, "Stop!" She shouted, Alicia ran next to her and quickly held her staff in a battle reader position. Ai and Ken looked at what was going on from behind the Knight and the Oracle...

It was Rad, on the ground, holding his arm in pain, while a man holding a wooden cane prepared another attack, before turning to the others with his cane still in the air, "...Friends of yours?" He asked Rad, turning his head to the thief.

"Y...Yeah..." Rad groaned, "Guys... He's got the writings..."

"You shouldn't have said that." The man grinned, he gave Rad a swift kick in the stomach, the thief fell back, "...Now, for you..."

"You!" Ken recognized the man, "I...I asked you if you knew anything about the thief!"

"...I had a feeling you'd--" The man was about to say something dramatic until an arrow shot through the air, hitting his hat and taking it off his head, revealing that he also had no hair.

Ken shouted, his crossbow in hand, "You're a thief and a LIAR!"

The thief glared, "Just for that, YOUR death will be SLOW!"

"HA! I don't mind living longer!" Ken shouted, in a vain attempt at a witty comeback.

Ai punched Ken in the arm, "We plan to SURVIVE this battle, stupid!"

"...Oh yeah..." Ken glared at the man, "I plan to SURVIVE this battle!"

"..Do you know who I am?" The man asked.

"...The guy who stole the Ancient writings." Lavian replied.

"I'm the great thief...Zero!"

"...Who?" The warriors and mage asked at once, even Rad coughing out a response that sounded like "Wh...Who...?"

"...Legendary leader of a band of thieves formed after the 50 years war?" Zero asked.

The group shook their heads.

Zero groaned, "Okay, fine...I'm more famous around Lionel anyhow..." He held his cane in the air, "Ready?" He asked, pointing it at Lavian.

"...You're kidding, right?" Lavian asked, "My sword'll cut through that piece of wood in a second!"

Zero twisted the cane, the lower part flying off, Lavian barely had time to block it with her sword, "I'm always prepared." It turned out the cane was really a rapier.

"This looks tough..." Ai muttered, she began to concentrate, "Shining light, be the armor that protects us! Protect!" A shield of light surrounded the group.

Ken jumped in front of Alicia, "I'll get those writings back!" He shouted, he shot an arrow at Zero, who dodged. Zero ran towards Ken, slicing the crossbow in two pieces, and slamming his fist into Ken's stomach. Ken let out a groan, before being pushed aside, the protect spell blocked most of the force, but Zero was still strong enough to break through most of the spell's defense.

Alicia made a quick dash behind Zero, she struck him in the back, and almost received a rapier in the side if she didn't dodge, "Smash all who hunger for destruction! Confusion song!" The spell hit Zero dead on, a bright light flashed through his body for a moment.

Zero simply laughed, "...Nice try."

Ai looked at Zero in surprise, "That spell hit you dead on! You SHOULD be a total idiot who can't fight now!"

Zero held up a pink ribbon, "Not with this! The ribbon, a special Odine Brand accessory that cancels ALL negative status spells, including confuse!"

Suddenly Ai, Lavian and Alica began to laugh, Ken and Rad (both still in the ground, trying to recover from Zero's attack) did the same.

"...Yes, I am aware it's a woman's accessory, but that's irrelevant!" Zero shouted in anger, a slight blush on his face, "...And they SHOULD have made an accessory for men that do the same thing!" He stomped on the ground, before using the hilt of his rapier to hit Alicia in the side, knocking her back. She hit the ground, next to Ken.

"A...Ajora...That guy's strong.." Alicia got back up, she charged at Zero, he grabbed her staff with one hand, hitting her with it and throwing her back, her staff following her.

"I've been a thief for more than twenty-five years, I know how to defeat anyone." Zero mumbled, he turned to Ai and Lavian, who backed off from Zero.

"This isn't good..." Lavian whispered to Ai, "We're not going to beat this guy without help."

Ai raised her hand into the air, "Scatter your chilly sharp blades! ICE!"

The ice spell formed over Zero. Zero held up his hand, the ice crystal flew over to Ai and hit her instead, "Reflect ring." He said, "I never leave home without it."

"...Sorry, Lavian, it's useless..." Ai groaned.

Zero stepped towards them, he raised his rapier, "...I think I'll take care of you two first, then I'll kill the others..." He stood in front of the staircase to the bar.

"Sorry I'm late! What'd I miss!?" Shouted a voice, the sound of running came from the stairs.

"What the-- AGH!" Zero shouted as Osamu bumped into him, he stumbled, dropping his sword and falling off the deck of the ship. Osamu grabbed his jacket before he fell into the water.

"Geez! Sorry, sir!" Osamu shouted, "I was in a hurry and--"

"AAAIIIEEE!" Zero's body slipped out of the jacket and he fell into the water.

"..Holy Ajora... MAN OVERBOARD!" Osamu shouted, running off to another part of the ship to get help, tossing Zero's jacket to the ground.

"...Lavian, you check the papers for the jacket, I'll heal Alicia, Ken and Rad!" Ai ran off to her fallen allies and began casting cure spells. Lavian began to dig through the jacket, eventually finding the ancient writings that had been stolen.

Osamu and crew members arrived minutes later, they fished Zero out of the water. Zero was arrested and held until the ship reached Warjilis. The writings were sent back to Gariland, while the group of six that recovered them received a reward as well as tickets to the next cruise to Gariland. Zero was taken to prison...

It had been eight days since they caught Zero, the group had a room reserved at the inn... It was the day before the ship would leave to Gariland, at 8:00 the next morning...

Ai woke up, she looked at the old grandfather clock on the other side of the room...It had stopped at 4:00 that morning, Ai could tell because there was a dagger stopping the hands. There was a note, she took it and read it aloud...

_Dear fools that "caught" me,  
I never leave my hideout unprepared. No prison can hold me.  
I'll find you guys later, I won't be so nice next time.  
-The great thief Zero _

PS: Check out your reward money.

Ai woke up the others, showing them the note, before she looked at the money...

The bag was filled with small pebbles, Zero had stolen their reward money.

"...We've been robbed..." Osamu growled, "That had ALL of our money in it!"

"At least we still have our tickets." Lavian held up the six sets of tickets for the cruise back to Gariland.

The group quickly dressed and ran down to the front of the inn...

...Only to find a working clock, the time was 1:00 in the afternoon. The ship had already left.

"Excuse me." The Innkeeper called the group, "A man wanted me to give you this note before you left." Ken took the note and read it.

_What time is it?  
Must be too late to catch your boat.  
I caught mine, 8:00 to Gariland.  
I guess it may have been wrong of me to cast those  
sleep spells on your all. I should have used petrify.  
-Zero_

"...He's good..." Rad mumbled, "...Great, now what do we do?"

"Take what's left of our money, go to the bar and discuss plans." Lavian suggested.

"Works for me!" Osamu said.

Ken smiled, despite the situation, "I'm up for some ale."

"Fine with me." Ai mumbled, tearing up the note from Zero.

"Let's go!" Alicia pointed to the direction of the Warjilis bar. The rest of the group of warriors and mages followed, all hoping to figure out a way to get out of this mess...

To Be Continued...

_The Legendary Thief, Zorro-- I mean, Zero... _

Zero is a character from FFT, sort of. He has a series of Propositions that, unlike all others, are continuous -and- appear in different towns. The first is actually in Lionel, but I decided to give Zero and intro in this chapter. Will he have anything to do with the story? Maybe. Will he appear as a constant annoyance to the gang? Definitely.

Job Reports and Ramza's Evaluation are on hold, seeing as how Ramza is generic-less for the time being.

Regarding Alicia's job as an Oracle... Well, three Knights does make things a little boring. I chose her because, between her and Lavian, she has higher faith. I also thought that Ai could use a fellow mage, considering the number of warriors has suddenly increased by two...

On a related note: Most of the generic jobs featured thus far are my personal favorites from the game.

See you next chapter,  
-Shibaryou


	6. Wandering Gambler

Propositions  
Episode VI: Wandering Gambler -or- 21! The Black Jack Gabbiani!

Warjilis, the trade capital of Lionel. People have been known to make fortunes selling to the fur shops with skins from the many monsters that live in the area, others make their money by trading at the local shipyard.

And as for two knights, an archer, a priest, an oracle and a thief...

"Okay, maybe we could get a part time job somewhere..." Rad suggested, sitting with his friends at a bar by the inn. It was late that night, the group sat and discussed their options, using some of their remaining money on drinks, using Ken's theory that people come up with the most useful (or crazy) ideas when drunk. Currently, their plan was to get back to Igros and find some way of locating Ramza and the others.

"It'd still take months to afford a ticket to Igros. We need money NOW. We're already 2 weeks late. Ramza's gonna be mad..." Lavian said, hanging her head down, "Stupid Zero..."

"What about borrowing money from the bank?" Osamu asked.

Ai shook her head, "How will we pay them back? Not only that, but, those tickets are expensive..."

The group sighed in unison, learning forward on the table.

"...We could always walk..." Ken muttered.

"We're almost out of potions, things could get bad." Alicia said.

Ai was about to speak until a loud fanfare came from outside, followed by the sound of an explosion.

Ken jumped up, "Sounds like a battle...!" He grabbed his crossbow and arrows and ran out of the bar. The rest of the group followed him quickly, having their weapons ready.

"Whoah...!" Ken said in awe as he looked outside.

Music, louder than the fanfare, began to play. It came from the harbor, where fireworks could be seen, exploding over the water. The music was like that of a parade. People were walking out of their homes, and various buildings to see what was happening.

"What's going on!?" Alicia shouted, covering her ears as another firework went off. They weren't too far away, so the noise was very loud.

"It's coming from the harbor!" Osamu shouted over the music, sheathing his sword, "Let's check it out!"

The group took off, running through the crowd of people, eventually making it to the docks.

A huge steamboat was docked there, loud music playing from an orchestra on the top of the boat, fire works going off over the water, being launched from cannons. The words "Black Jack" were written on the side of the boat.

Just as the warriors made it to the front of the crowd, a large wooden plank fell from the boat and in front of the large crowd, almost hitting Ken.

The music began to play loudly, and more fireworks shot into the air as a man stepped out onto the plank. He had long white hair (resembling that of Marquis Elmdor), wearing a long black coat with golden buttons. He smiled broadly as he stepped in front of the crowd, the music began to soften, and the fireworks slowly came to a halt. There was silence as the man looked over the crowd, "Welcome, ladies and gentlemen," He finally said, "noblemen and commoners, warriors and mages. Welcome to the one, the only, the amazing... Black Jack!" Fire works came from the ship once again, about twenty of them shot into the air at once and exploded, "I am Setzer Gabbiani, the owner of this marvelous boat. I have come to Warjilis to bring you adventure, excitement, money," Setzer continued, but one word echoed through the heads of six people in the crowd...

"Money..." Osamu whispered to himself.

Ai's eyes lit up, "Cash..."

Rad rubbed his hands together greedily, "Moneymoneymoneymoney..." He chanted over and over.

Alica grinned, "Moolah..."

Lavian let out a low gasp of excitement, "Thank you, Ajora..." She whispered.

"...Man I hope that place has a buffet or something, I'm starving." Ken thought to himself, looking up at the ship in awe.

The group paid close attention to Setzer, "The Black Jack is a casino ship, I sail the high seas and dock in ports such as this for just about any amount of time! My casino is open twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week... You could win thousands of gil in a single hand of poker, or..." He raised his hand, showing an ace of spades to the crowd, "...Black Jack." He finally said. He turned away and stepped back onto the ship, "We are open starting..." He paused stepping onto a walkway next to the entrance of the casino, taking a pocket watch out of his jacket. The crowd immediately ran into the casino boat, some people being knocked into the water, "...Now." He said as the last of the crowd entered the casino ship. He slipped the watch into his pocket, "...Excellent." He looked onto the port of Warjilis cautiously before reentering the casino boat again, "...I doubt he'll try it again."

The group of warriors were some of the last to enter the ship. It was beautifully lit up by torches, decorated with vases and paintings. There was a room with three pathways leading to different parts of the ship.

Rad looked at the signs above the pathways, "Casino, Bar, and Inn."

"I personally, suggest the poker tables." Said a voice from behind him.

The group turned, facing a man with a long purple cape that stopped about an inch above the ground, he wore a black suit with a purple undershirt and black. His hair was long, blonde and tied into a pony tail, "That's just my opinion, of course." There was a moment of silence, the man chuckled to himself, extending his hand to Rad, "I'm Tsubasa Kirei."

Rad shook Tsubasa's hand, "Rad." He said.

"Pleased to meet you." Tsubasa looked around the room, looking at a painting, "Beautiful decorations..." He commented, "The lighting is magnificent..."

"Uh... Yeah." Rad replied, unsure of what to say.

"Pardon me, I get caught up in the beauty of things too often at times." Tsubasa looked at the rest of the group, "Friends of yours, Rad?"

Rad nodded, "Yeah. We've been traveling together for a while."

Tsubasa nodded, "Hello, I am honored to meet you. Any friend of Rad's is a friend of mine." He gracefully bowed.

"What's with this guy?" Ai muttered to Alicia.

"What games are you going to try?" Ken asked.

"I like poker and slot machines. I hear the ones on the Black Jack are...'loose' as some would say." Tsubasa replied, "I seem to be having good luck this week...perhaps I'll win Setzer's _entire_ vault." He chuckled, before bowing once more, "Farewell, good luck winning."

"There's something weird about that guy..." Rad commented.

Ken shrugged, "You see all types of people in this place, not that surprising."

"Hm, I suppose someone should keep an eye on him." A voice behind the group said as soon as Tsubasa was away.

Rad turned, "O-oh! Mr. Gabbiani!"

Setzer looked into his casino, resting his chin in one hand in thought, "...You." He finally pointed to Osamu.

"Wh-What?!"

"Ever hear of war?" Setzer pulled a deck of cards from his pocket, "Not battle itself, but I mean the card game."

"Err... Yeah, it's...really old..."

Setzer skillfully shuffled the cards in his hands, "I need some extra security in this area due to a recent attempted theft by a man known as Zero. I trust people who have better luck than I do, and I hear that Zero was captured by a group similar to yours before his latest escape." He held the deck of cards to Osamu, spreading them out in both hands, "Pick a card, any card."

Osamu shrugged, choosing a card from the middle. No sooner did he take it, when Setzer rearranged the cards into a single pile, the snap and sudden movement started Osamu somewhat. Setzer chuckled to himself, pulling a card from the top of the deck. He looked at it, cocking his head to the side and smiling, "Your card?"

Osamu held up a Jack of Spades.

"Hm, too bad." Setzer revealed that he had an Ace of hearts, "Nice try, however." He turned away.

"Hold it." Ai said.

"Hm?" Setzer turned back to Ai and Osamu, "What is it?"

"You cheated." Ai said.

"How did I cheat?" Setzer asked.

"When you put the cards back into a straight deck, that ace of hearts came out of your sleeve! Oldest trick in the book!" Ai shouted, "I saw it with my own two eyes!"

"Hm, I see I was wrong." Setzer chuckled, "Well then, you're all hired."

"Excuse me?" Rad asked.

"Ten thousand gil for one night, to each other you." Setzer said, "You will be my undercover security team, do we have a deal, Mr. Osamu?" Setzer turned to the male knight. He extended his hand to Osamu.

"Err... Uh... Sure!" Osamu nodded, shaking Setzer's hand. Setzer gave him a pat on the shoulder.

"Good, keep Zero and any of his flunkies out of my casino and you'll get your money in the morning. I'll have someone bring you to my office at that time." Setzer bowed his head, "May lady luck be with you." He walked off.

"How'd you know he cheated?" Lavian asked, stepping up behind Ai.

"Wait, this wouldn't have anything to do with the fact you always beat me at poker, would it?" Rad asked.

"...Maybe." 

"What the...!?" Osamu looked at his pocket, "Guys...?" He held up a bag, "What's this?"

"Your pocket, you tell us." Ken said.

Osamu opened the bag, "...Poker chips?"

"Setzer must have slipped them in there when he shook your hand. I guess they're for us." Rad said, "Count me out, I'm not much for poker."

Alicia held out her hand, "I'll take Rad's share!" She smiled.

Osamu divided and gave out the poker chips to himself, Ai, Alicia and Ken. Lavian and Rad weren't interested.

Ai turned away, "Come on, let's keep an eye out for Zero and anyone suspicious. We'll split up and meet back here at 1:00."

"All right." Rad nodded, "C'mon, Ken, Lavian, why don't we...team up?" He chuckled.

"I'm staying out of this." Osamu muttered, knowing exactly what Rad was up to, "I'll keep an eye on the keno room, Alicia?" He turned to the Oracle.

"I'll be at the poker tables." Alicia said.

The group split up.

Ai walked through the blackjack tables, keeping an eye out for anyone suspicious. Most of the players looked to be normal commoners, aside from that flamboyantly dressed man they had met earlier. He was at a slot machine by a hall entrance with two guards standing in front of it.

...Wait a second... ...Did something just move?!

Ai casually snuck to the slot machines. She sat in one, three machines to the right of Tsubasa and kept an eye on the doorway.

Every so often, the light around the guards would warp...

Ai looked around her, trying not to attract Tsubasa's attention. She spotted Alicia playing poker at a table.

Perfect.

Ai casually got up again, and walked off to the poker table Alicia was playing at. It was full, but...

"Hold it!" Ai shouted, pointing to a man to the left of Alicia, "That guy's cheating!"

The dealer looked at Ai shocked, as did the man, "How so!?" The man shouted.

"Open up his jacket!" She shouted, "I'll bet you anything that there's a bunch of aces up his sleeve! I already saw him put one into his hand!"

"How dare you!" The man shouted.

"Open your jacket." The dealer said, "We need to check anyone accused of cheating."

"I will not! How dare you even ask! Do you know who I am!?" The man shouted, standing up, "I don't need to take this! I'm leaving!"

The dealer snapped his fingers, two security guards from a nearby table walked next to the man and grabbed his arms.

"LET GO OF ME!" The man screamed as he was dragged out of the casino.

Ai sat next to Alicia, taking the man's seat, "Deal me in the next hand." She said.

The dealer nodded. When the hand was finished, he gave Ai five cards.

Ai looked at her cards. Three of a kind. Can't have that.

Ai placed a small bet, "Give me three cards." She said after everyone else had bet and put down cards. She out down her three of a kind.

The dealer nodded, giving Ai three new cards.

No hand, not even a lousy jack. Perfect.

Ai put down another small bet, she was raised by a woman across the table. She put down a few chips.

"I call." Alicia said.

Ai was the last to put down her cards, "Darn! No luck with any cards for me tonight!" She said, getting, "I'll head to the slots. Anyone care to join me?" She glanced at Alicia.

Alicia got what Ai was saying, "I guess I've won enough for tonight." She said, "Good luck, everyone." She got up and left with Ai.

"There's something going on." Ai said, "You'll see, there's a hallway with two guards that, I think, leads to the vault."

"What's the problem?"

"Every so often, the light around the guards warps. It's slight, so you'd have to pay attention."

"Gotcha." Alicia sat next to Ai at some slots machines, carefully watching the hallway.

Sure enough, the light warped slightly, as if something passed by.

"Oh, I know what's going on..." Alicia whispered to herself, she held her hand forward, "Illusions, lies to--"

"Conjurers seek truth in silence. Silence song." Tsubasa whispered, glancing at Alicia.

"..." Alicia tried to shout, but no words came from her mouth. She tapped on Ai's shoulder.

"What?" Ai whispered.

Alicia frantically pointed to Tsubasa, then to her mouth, then back to Tsubasa.

"...Cat got your tongue?" Ai asked, confused, "Speak up." Alicia glared.

She held her hands up, mouthing the words to "Silence Song."

"Silence?"

Alicia nodded. She then pointed to Tsubasa, who seemed oblivious to her and Ai's sudden movements.

"He silenced you?"

Alicia nodded.

"Why?"

Alicia glared and shrugged.

"Because she was about to cast dispel on my partner." Tsubasa said, looking at Ai, "Conjurers, seek truth in silence. Silence song."

Ai was about to shout, but like Alicia, no words came from her mouth.

"You foolish mages are useless when silenced. Such a shame, too, you have such pretty voices." Tsubasa chuckled, going back to the slot machine and playing.

Ai glared, she pointed to the bar.

Alicia nodded.

They walked to the bar, where they found Rad, Ken and Lavian...

Both mages ran to the group and waved frantically to get their attention.

"Something wrong!?" Ken shouted.

Ai and Alicia nodded.

"What is it?" Lavian asked.

Ai and Alicia pointed back to the slot machines.

"Timmy in the well?" Rad asked. Ai and Alica shot sharp glares at him.

"Silenced by another mage?" Ken asked.

Ai and Alicia nodded. Ai mouthed the word ECHO GRASS.

"Nope, I accidentally used it in a salad for lunch earlier." Lavian said. Ai and Alicia glared, "What?! It looks and tastes just like lettuce!"

"Bartender! Two remedies!" Rad shouted, looking to across the room. The bartender nodded.

The bartender tossed two bottled potions to Rad, who caught them. He handed them to Ai and Alicia. They quickly downed them.

Ai spoke first, her voices was a bit quieter than usual, "It's Tsubasa, he cast it on us."

Alicia followed up with, "He's got a partner with a vanish spell, it looks like that's how they're stealing money from the vault."

"Let's go!" Ken stood up, Rad and Lavian joined him, "Osamu's still in the keno room, probably. Lavian, you run and get him."

"Right!" Lavian nodded and jogged off. The rest ran off to the slot machine. As they neared it, Alicia began chanting again.

"Illusions, lies to heaven! Dispel magic!" She shouted.

A puff of smoke appeared between the two guards.

A talk man with black hair and a beard stood between the guards. He had a thin, almost clear cape...A vanish mantle. He also held two large bags of gil in his hands.

"...This is not good..." The man ducked between the two guards and into the casino.

"Land of all lives, suppress all rebels! Don't move!" Tsubasa cast a spell onto the two guards and followed after the man.

The group chased after them, Alicia frantically tried to cast a spell onto Tsubasa, but none of them seemed the work, "Wait..." She looked, "Argh! He's got a ribbon!"

"What is it with men and wearing ribbons these days?" Ken asked.

Tsubasa and his partner skid to a halt at the small room they entered in, where Lavian and Osamu were waiting with their swords drawn, standing at the door. Ai, Rad, Ken and Alicia caught up behind them.

"Well, Kensuke," Tsubasa said, "it seems our new friends have outsmarted us. I underestimated them."

Kensuke was silent.

"Kensuke?"

Kensuke opened his mouth to speak, no words came out.

"Yes! One of my spells hit him! So, only you and Zero wear ribbons!" Alicia shouted.

Tsubasa closed his eyes, sighing as he pointed at Kensuke, "...Heavenly wind, carry us to the fountain of power. Esuna."

Kensuke spoke up, "So, you're the ones that caught Zero! He told us not to worry about you, that you were just lucky!"

"Perhaps they are." Tsubasa said, "After all, we are in the casino. Perhaps the maiden of luck is not with us tonight."

"Give back the money!" Ken shouted, "Don't make us take it!"

"Ooh! Big words for someone like you!" Kensuke held up the two bags of gil he stole, "At least we got enough of this to make the boss happy. Tell Setzer we'll get the rest later!"

"No, we'll get it all back!" Ai shouted, holding her staff tightly, "And beat you two up for trying to steal it!"

"Oh, my, they seem quite serious, Ken-Ken..." Tsubasa hid behind Kensuke, "We should do as they say." He laughed as he held up his hand, "Or...We could play just a bit longer...Strip away the ground with glistening blades! Bolt!"

A bolt shot from Tsubasa's hand and at Ken. The archer ducked. The bolt traveled past him and hit a slot machine.

Kensuke drew out a sword that was sheathed at his side. He charged at Lavian, she blocked his sword and tried to kick him back, Osamu was next to attack him while he was occupied with Lavian, he raised his sword and tried to bring it down on Kensuke.

Kensuke grabbed Osamu's arm with one hand, then tossed him onto the ground. Ai joined in the battle to assist the two Knights. She hit Kensuke in the head with her staff. Eventually, Kensuke was mostly defensive against his three opponents, but he could still put up a decent fight.

Tsubasa, on the other hand was taunting his opponents...

"Did I mention that we are Zero's personal bodyguards?" Tsubasa said, dodging a blow from Alicia's rod, "I am Tsubasa Kirei, and my friend is Kensuke Arashi. Zero only hires the best of the best, and that's what we are..." He shot fireball at Rad, who snuck up behind him. The thief rolled on the floor to put out his clothes. An arrow grazed Tsubasa's cheek, scratching him, "Ahhh!" Tsubasa screamed, "How dare you!" He pointed at Ken (who reloaded his arrows) then raised his arm, "For that, I shall burn you alive! Out of the ground raze all--"

Two spinning cards cut the sleeve of Tsubasa's cloak. Tsubasa shouted again as he saw the trace of blood from the scratches, his spell was interrupted.

"I don't think so." Setzer came out of the hallway marked as 'Inn,' "I'll take my money back, if you please."

"Never!"

Setzer sighed, "You make this so difficult when it doesn't have to be." He snapped his fingers. Casino guards poured out of the other two halls, at least twenty in total. There were even a few blocking the doorway out of the casino.

"Dear me..." Tsubasa stepped back, "This battle...does not appear to be in our favor..."

"Inexperienced twerps...Yeah..." Kensuke lowered his sword, "But this... Is a new one..."

"What's going on?" Ai asked. She and the others regrouped and stood by Setzer.

"My guards are specially trained to use both magic and physical abilities." Setzer said, "Zero's organization may have some tough characters, but my guards are trained to be able to handle most of them." He reached into his pocket, pulling out a deck of cards, "Now...How to deal with you..." He shuffled the cards, then took the card from the top of the pile, "Hm... Burn them."

The guards at the door moved outside as the rest of the guards raised their hands...

"OUT OF THE GROUND, RAZE ALL GREENERY WITH FLAME! FIRE!" The guards chanted.

A sudden blaze launched Kensuke and Tsubasa out of the ship like a cannon. They landed in the water. Tsubasa held onto Kensuke, apparently unable to swim, as Kensuke swam for the shore, occasionally diving to avoid spells from guards stationed outside.

Setzer picked up his bags of gil, "Well, we're lucky. Only six were taken. Not too bad." He emptied the bag, only half of it was filled with gil coins, the other half was pieces of scrap metal, "Thank you for your help." He said. He reached into his pocket and tossed a small bag of gil to the group.

"Eh?! I thought you promised us ten thousand...This is only two thousand." Lavian said, counting the coins.

"Hm, you're right, you were underpaid." Setzer took five gil coins from the bag he poured, he tossed them to Rad, "Two thousand two hundred and twenty-two."

"That's still--"

"You didn't read your contract, did you?" Setzer asked.

"Contract?" Osamu asked.

Setzer walked over to Osamu and took the empty bag of poker chips from him, he unfolded it, "Here." A message was written on the inside of this bag.

_By using the poker chips contained within this bag  
the undercover security force (heron Party of the First)  
agrees that any and all damages to the Black Jack Casino Ship  
(heron Party of the Second) will be deducted from their payment of  
Ten Thousand Gil._

If the damages to the Casino exceed Ten Thousand Gil the Party Of the First  
is legally obligated to repay the Party Of The Second the amount owed for  
repairs. If the Party of the First cannot replace these damages, then  
it will be forced to work for Party of the Second as either a janitor or a  
poker dealer until otherwise noted by the Party Of The Second's Founder,  
Setzer Gabbiani.

Osamu stared at the "contract" blankly, as did the others, more or less with their jaws dropped.

"Now, now, if it makes you feel better I didn't deduct any of your bar tab or the burn damage to this entrance." Setzer said, "The ship will leave in forty-eight hours if you wish to spend the rest of your contract or your payment."

"...Can we cash in the chips?" Ai asked.

"Yes." Setzer nodded.

"...Good. How many does everyone have?" Ai asked.

Alicia was silent, "...About twelve gil worth."

"I already cashed in my chips." Osamu said, "I lost it all on Keno."

Ai sighed, "Well, I have eighty-five in chips."

Ken held up his chips, "I still have my hundred gil!"

Setzer bowed his head, "Well, I thank you for your help. Good night, I must return to my work. The guards will clean up the mess."

"...I can't believe he did that." Alicia commented, "I mean, really, a hidden contract?"

"I should have expected it." Ai said, "This is a casino, after all."

Osamu sighed, "At least we still got some money out of it. Let's just cash in the chips and pretend this didn't happen."

After cashing in the chips, the group returned to the inn they had been staying at.

Now, they at least had enough to buy new supplies, food and afford to stay at the inn longer.

...But two thousand gil wasn't nearly enough to get back to Igros...

To Be Continued...

_The plot thickens..._

Setzer is actually mentioned in this job report (referred to as "Mr. Setzer"), so I just had to put him in here.

Tsubasa and Kensuke are two of my characters, they don't appear in FFT at all. I just wanted to give Zero a few friends to help rob Ivalice blind. Expect more details on Zero's plans, soon.

See you next chapter,  
Shibaryou


	7. Destiny of the Company

Propositions  
Episode VII: Destiny Of The Company -or- !$#!! The Name's Cid!

**WARNING: This episode contains strong language and slightly suggestive content (...well, not really, just an old pervert running around after a few too many drinks).**

The Black Jack was leaving port that afternoon, Setzer felt that his work there was done. He was leaving with one final party outside of his boat, a 100 gil a plate buffet.

Surprisingly, a certain six people were invited to the event for free...

"This has to be a trick." Osamu said, looking at the invitation. Six of them had been dropped off in their room at the inn by one of Setzer's messengers, "He's going to cheat us again."

"I don't know," Rad shrugged, inspecting his invitation and envelope, "I don't see a hidden contract."

"I'd expect one hidden in a shrimp cocktail." Ai stated, leaning against a wall.

"Maybe he's going to pay us the rest of our money." Alicia suggested, "At the very least, if he gave us another three thousand, we'd have just enough to make it to Dorter."

"That's if we can find cheap potions," Ai said, "we'll be in big trouble if we go up Barius Hill unprepared, Barius Valley will be tough enough."

"Yeah, remember that time we fought twelve monsters with Ramza and the others?" Rad asked, "I didn't think we'd make it out of that one...Three behemoths..."

"Well, we might as well check it out." Lavian shrugged, "These invitations do say that we'll get in free, so it's a free meal, at least."

"I like the idea of free food!" Ken piped up.

"You would..." Ai muttered, "Then again, I guess it'll be better than just eating free peanuts at the bar."

"Yeah, the bartender says we're talking unfair advantage of his generosity." Lavian added.

Osamu shook his head, "I think he's more so referring to the fact that you stuff your pockets with peanuts before leaving."

"You mean I'm not the only one that does that?!" Rad shouted as he reached into his pocket and pulled out a peanut. He opened it and ate it.

"So, we're going?" Lavian asked.

"I guess..." Ai glanced at a clock, "It's starting in about two hours, anyway."

Rad jumped up, tossing his peanut shells behind him, "All right! Free food, and enough time beforehand for some bar nuts!"

Ai groaned, "...Rad, did you hear a word that Lavian said about the bartender's generosity?"

"Yeah, something about how we should thank him or something," Rad said, leaving the room, "bye!"

Osamu spoke, "He's a thief, we should see things like this coming."

"Right..." Ai rolled her eyes.

-------------------

Setzer stood in a fenced off part of the port. The fence had been placed by his workers at the casino, they were to keep the uninvited or the unpaying out of his farewell party.

He shuffled a deck of cards in his hands, thinking. Only twenty minutes until the party. He always hated to leave ports, but he had his schedule to keep. He would return next year, like he always did.

Setzer lifted the top card from the top of his deck.

The Jack of Spades. Setzer smiled, his lucky card.

"Sir, we're almost done setting out the food." A worker approached Setzer, "Is there anything else?"

"Did you prepare the fireworks?" Setzer asked.

"On it, sir." The worker jogged off.

----------

A crowd had already surrounded the fenced off area, though the party would not begin for another few minutes. A worker was already selling tickets to the crowd.

Setzer stepped out of the fenced area, smiling broadly and clapping hands together, "Weclome one and all to the Black Jack's farewell party. We will be departing to the North. I thank you all for coming and gambling at my Casino ship. We depart in an hour, all of you with tickets may enter and enjoy our celebration." Setzer took out a pocket watch and stepped aside, "You may enter..." A group of people, the 'heroes' being among them, ran into the fenced area, "...Now." He put the pocket watch away, smiling. He entered the fenced area, shaking hands as he walked to the buffet.

"Oh, this is good!" Osamu shouted, grabbing two drumsticks and eating them at the buffet.

Rad was tearing apart ribs, "Very good!"

Ken was shoveling a bowl of rice pudding into his mouth, "All is forgiven!"

Lavian was stuffing mixed nuts and rolls into her pockets, with a sandwich in her mouth, "Eckshlnt!" She tried to say without dropping the sandwich.

Ai and Alicia rolled their eyes, sipping wine given to them by a waiter, "...Idiots." They both said.

Setzer approached the ground, "Welcome back, my friends. I see you got my invitations."

"Was there a hidden contract in the shrimp cocktails this time?" Ai asked, bluntly.

Setzer laughed, "Of course not! No contracts this time, I assure you! I invited you here to thank you again for your help."

"Yourwelcomethanksforinvitingus!" The eating warriors shouted, not turning to face Setzer and still stuffing food into their mouths.

"...Well, as long as it's a free meal and all." Alicia bowed her head, "Thank you for inviting us."

"You're welcome." Setzer still smiled, "Eat, drink and be merry, my friends!" He bowed his head and walked off.

"...I'm still checking my shrimp cocktails." Ai stated.

"Me, too." Alicia added, sipping her wine.

-----------

Surprisingly to all, Setzer had no hidden agenda. Not that any of them complained, they enjoyed the free food and drink.

The steamship was about to depart, Setzer stood on the side of the ship waving, "Farewell, all! I will be back next year!" The ship began to depart.

Ai, Alicia, Lavian, Rad, Osamu and Ken waved with the crowd.

A round of fireworks was shot into the air from the ship, the Black Jack turned...

...And started to sail directly into another ship.

"TURN THE SHIP!" Setzer screamed, running into the bridge, "WHERE'S CAPTAIN COLE!?"

A crew member ran out of the bridge, "He had a bit too much wine and--"

"FORGET IT! TURN THE SHIP! WE'RE ABOUT TO CRASH!"

The crowds outside of the ship cringed, expecting the sound of both ships crashing...

Instead, they heard a loud string of curses...

...Not from Setzer, but from the captain of the other ship...

Ai looked, the Black Jack escaped harm, but the other ship had run aground on a sandbar in an attempt to avoid Setzer... It was stuck. A man with short cut blond hair was screaming a loud string of curses at Setzer's ship and shaking his fist.

It was under half an hour before the captain was calmed down and brought to shore by a rowboat.

The crowd dispersed in disgust of the language that came from this captain. Never had some of them heard such "creative usage" of a few of the curses.

The group had returned to the Warjilis Bar.

"Man, Setzer is really lucky," Rad said, grabbing a handful of bar peanuts, "I mean, he almost hit that ship."

Ai sipped her ale, "Yeah, it's a good thing he saw the other ship so quickly..."

"WHADDYA MEAN YOUR SHIP IS STUCK?!"

The group turned to face a table at the end of the bar. The captain of the ship Setzer almost hit was arguing with another person.

"I told you," The captain lit up a handrolled cigarette, "the Highwind won't be able to get out of there without some workers." He looked to the man, sharply, "And I ain't paying for no damned salvage team, it's your product, not mine. I'm just dropping this crap off and picking your crap up here. Hell, I'm more pissed about the fact all my damn tea got ruined than anything else."

The group focused on their conversation.

"I've got an idea..." Alicia said, getting up.

"But, you must! I'll lose my job--"

"Like I said, I don't give a rat's--"

"Excuse me..." Alicia stepped up to the two men, she had an idea, "You said you needed a salvaged team?"

"What the hell do you want?" The captain muttered, taking a puff of his cigarette.

"Where is your ship headed?" Alicia asked.

"Goug. What's it to you?"

"My friends and I are in a bit of a pinch, we need to get to Igros, but don't have to money to get there. If you can get us to Goug, we can go through Murond and get to Dorter..."

"Point bein'?" The captain put out his cigarette.

"If you promise to take us to Goug, we'll get your ship unstuck."

The captain laughed, "Oh? Do you know what it takes to salvage a ship like mine? You'd need a bunch of strong workers!"

"We can do it." Alicia stated, glaring at the captain. He slowly stopped laughing.

"All...right..." The captain chuckled, holding out his hand, "Name's Highwind, call me Captain Highwind and we'll get along fine. You impress me by getting my ship, the Highwind, to port I'll take you to Goug." Alicia shook his hand, "But if you don't, I have full right to laugh my arse off."

"Deal. Let me get my workers." Alicia went back to her table, announcing to the others, "I got us a way to Goug!"

"How?" Ai asked.

"Well, Captain Highwind agreed to take us to Goug if we can pull his ship out off the sandbar." Alicia explained.

Rad immediately held his stomach in pain. "Ooh... I think this ale was poisoned...!"

Osamu held his lower back, moaning, "I can't, my back... Oh, I have a doctor's note saying..." He trailed off.

Ai looked away casually. "Hm? What'd you say? I suddenly can't hear anything..."

Lavian shook her arm in mock-pain. "Ow! Ow! I think there's a storm coming, my arm is killing me! Ow!"

"I think I hear my mother calling me..." Ken started for the bar doors.

Alicia growled, "Listen up, as an Oracle, I am capable of manipulating the powers of Yin and Yang... ...And as such, if you guys don't help me move this ship, I'm going to be using my powers to manipulate _your_ yin and yang!"

"Oh! The Yin Yang be blessed! My stomach is okay!" Rad cried, throwing his arms in the air in celebration.

Osamu jumped into the air. "My back is fine now, it's a miracle!"

"I can hear! THANK YOU AJORA!" Ai did the same.

"The storm must've passed..." Lavian commented.

"I'm coming, mom!" Ken still started for the door, Alicia tripped him with her staff. "Whoah!" He hit the ground with a loud thud.

"Stick around, momma's boy." Ai reached down and picked up Ken. "We're moving a ship."

Captain Highwind went to the table, he had a bottle of vaccas liquor in his hand. "So, we goin' or what?"

Rad nodded. "Yessir! Let's mosey!"

"Quit talkin' like a wimp!" Captain Highwind pointed to the door and started marching. "Move out!"

The others followed Captain Highwind outside.

"So, where's your rowboat?" Osamu asked.

"What the hell're you talking about?" Highwind responded.

"Well, y'know, to get out to the sandbar..." Osamu muttered.

"It's on the Highwind, looks like you guys'll have to rent one..." Highwind chuckled, lighting up another cigarette before taking a swig of his drink.

The others turned to Alicia, giving her a light glare.

Alicia pointed to a Yin Yang symbol stitched on her clothes warningly. The others sighed in unison and went on to find someone who would lend them a boat.

They went down to the port where Ai was in charge of dealing, while the others tried to keep a drunk Captain Highwind in check.

"Hey, baby, want a real man?" Captain Highwind was already starting trouble by hitting on a woman...With her husband right next to her.

"I beg your pardon sir, but leave my wife alone." The man ordered.

"What's it to you?" Captain Highwind blew some smoke in the man's face. He coughed and began rolling up his sleeves, Highwind started to do the same.

Quickly, Rad and Osamu pulled Captain Highwind away. "Sorry, sir!" They both cried.

"Lemme go! I'm goin' to kick his ass!" Captain Highwind cried, adding even more curses to follow. People who could hear him gaped in horror.

A young child tugged on his mother's dress as Captain Highwind passed by. "Mommy, what does that word the angry man said mean?"

The mother, who was gaping in pure horror, replied with, "It... It's a word that only people who are going to hell say... ...Never say it unless you want to go to hell..."

"He's a bad man, mommy..."

"Indeed he is..."

Meanwhile, Ai was talking to the owner of the only rowboat at the pier...

"Forget it, I ain't lettin' no-one near the SS Jenny!" The owner replied.

"We really need it, you can row us out if you don't trust us. We'll pay you whatever you want!" Ai pleaded.

"No!"

A woman's shout and a loud slapping sound was heard behind Ai, following by a string of curses from Captain Highwind.

"Ugh... That maniac is back in town? Who ever hires him?" Muttered the boat's owner.

"Well, he hit a sandbar and needs our help to get it out... Of course, we can't do that..." Ai shook her head with a sigh and shrugged.

"...Go on."

"Well, let me put it this way, the sooner we borrow your boat, the sooner we get Captain Highwind and his foul mouthed antics out of Warjilis." Ai replied.

The man was silent for a moment, he glanced down to his boat and said, "...Be good to Jenny, please..." He started to untie the boat from the dock.

Ai motioned for the others to bring Captain Highwind to the boat. Osamu and Lavian were in charge of rowing, while Captain Highwind sat at the head of the boat and yelled at them. "Row faster, quit taking your sweet time!"

"Can we just push him overboard and steal his boat?" Rad whispered to Ai.

"If only..." Ai growled.

"LESS YAPPIN', MORE ROWIN'!" Highwind screamed at Ai and Rad.

They reached the sandbar. Osamu inspected the damage. "Boat's fine, from the look of it...We just need to get it loose." He pushed on the boat, the others joined in. Except Captain Highwind, he just sat by and drank. "Stupid kids... You ain't never gonna get that boat outta there..."

"Not with _that_ attitude..." Ken groaned. He looked around. "Aha! I got it!" He made a makeshift lever out of a large piece of driftwood and a rock. "Come on! Osamu, Rad and I lift, while Ai, Lavian and Alicia push!"

Unfortunately, the ship still wouldn't move. Highwind was laughing the whole time.

"Let me try helping lift..." Alicia went over to help. After her, Lavian. The ship wouldn't budge. After a moment, the driftwood snapped and sent everyone (save for Ai, who was still pushing, and Captain Highwind, who was still in the rowboat).

Highwind roared with laughter, tossing his empty bottle aside. "Dumbasses! All of ya! Ha ha ha! I ain't ever seen such a stupid group in my life!"

Ai had had enough. With a scream, she raised her hands, "THAT TEARS IT!"

Highwind shut up, shuffling back in the row boat. "Wh-What the hell!?"

"BRIGHT LIGHT..."

Osamu immediately recognized that spell. "SHE'S GONNA BLOW US ALL TO KINGDOM COME! DIVE!"

Everyone took a deep breath and dove, save for Highwind who was backing against the rowboat in terror.

"...SHINE DOWN..."

"NO! NO! PLEASE, NO!" Highwind screamed.

"ON BLOODY IMPURITY! HOLY!" Ai screamed, a white light shooting forth from her hands into the air.

The explosion was violent and could be seen from Warjilis. People started to panic, fleeing for their lives as a bright arrow of light shot into the sea. The following explosion cause a large wave to go about five feet over the docks. Thankfully, no-one was harmed.

Ken surfaced first, the others popped up one by one.

Captain Highwind popped his head out from under the capsized rowboat and looked up at Ai, who had her back turned with a glare fixated forward, she was panting heavily. He happily said, "Hey! You got my ship free!"

Ai turned to Captain Highwind, glaring.

"S-Sorry!" Highwind hid back under the boat.

"What was _on_ this boat that was so special anyway?" Lavian asked, lifting up a corner of the rowboat.

"Follow me! I'll show you!" Highwind swam to his boat and climbed up a rope ladder. The others, Ai included, followed. Highwind took them into the hull where there was a series of large crates. "The company said I could sample a few, but dammit if I don't hate Southern continental cooking..." He opened a crate and gave everyone a single wrapped package each.

Ai looked at the writing. "...Choco Bun?"

"It's some new food craze to the South, the company that makes it is expanding." Captain Highwind explained.

Everyone took a bite. Immediately, they all began to spit it out.

"THAT'S HORRIBLE!" Rad screamed, scraping his tongue with both hands to try to get rid of the taste. "Who would buy that?!"

"Hey, I don't market, I just sail ships..." Highwind pulled out a metal case of cigarettes. He tried to light one. With a sigh, he realized the case wasn't as watertight as he had hoped. He turned the case upside down, a tan colored water and a few wet cigarettes fell out. "...Well, we gotta go back to town to get some smokes and your crap, then we're outta here..."

To Be Continued...

_Notes: A Captain Highwind or Cid Highwind was not mentioned at all in the proposition, but where there's a vessal called "The Highwind" you can bet your ass Cid Highwind will be there to pilot it!_

Sorry if anyone doesn't like the foul language, but...Well, he's based on Cid, ya know?

-Shibaryou


	8. Machinist Contest

Propositions  
Chapter VIII: Machinist Contest! -or- Heretics! Murond is Forbidden!

**T**he Highwind set sail immediately after unloading its cargo. The Captain insisted on it, he wanted to get away from Ai as quickly as possible. The group saw him off, save for Alicia who was chartering a boat to Murond with what was left of their money.

Alicia stood at a dock, talking to the owner of a small sailboat, for transporting cargo. The man shook his head, as Alicia pleaded.

"No way!" The sailor repeated. "I can get you to Murond, but I'm not going any further North. My boat can't handle the rough seas north of Murond, and even if it could, you can barely make it _to_ Murond _if_ I wasn't nice enough to cut the price for you..."

"Can't you at least try? You are sending supplies up to the temple, right?" Alicia asked.

"Yeah, but they wouldn't have us go North unless something big was going on," the sailor said. "With the war breaking out, maybe, but I hear the Church is claiming neutrality."

"Alicia, what's wrong with Murond?" Ai asked, stepping up to Alicia with the rest of the group. Lavian also looked a bit nervous when the subject of Murond came up.

"N-Nothing," Alicia said. "I just don't want to bother the Church, you know?"

"Yeah, let's not bother the church..." Lavian nodded.

"Come on, it's the Church, right? They'll help anyone in need!" Rad said, Lavian elbowed him in the side. "Ow, what?"

"Look, I can get you to the church, but from there you're on your own," the sailor repeated.

"All right, deal..." Alicia sighed, reaching into her bag for a handful of gil. "When do you head out?"

"At noon, you'll get to the temple by morning," the sailor said. "Name's Lamont, Captain Lamont." He held his hand forward, Alicia shook it.

"Thank you, Captain, we'll load our stuff onto the ship and wait on board." Alicia said.

"All right, I've got to get back to work," Lamont walked to the edge of the dock and boarded his ship. He gave orders to the crew as they loaded crates on deck.

"Alicia, what's going on?" Ai whispered. "You act like you're a heretic or something?"

"Uh...Remember when you guys and Rad went on that little mining adventure?" Alicia asked.

"Yeah, why?"

"Ah...Nevermind, actually," Alicia smiled, nervously. "It's nothing, I forgot, you're a Priest, you should be able to get us some help from the Church after all."

Ai shrugged. "I guess..."

By noon, the ship had set sail for the Murond Holy Palace. By the next morning, before sunrise, the ship had docked at the front of the giant church.

Alicia and Lavian hadn't slept a wink, while everyone else slept without problem. As they stepped off the ship, Alicia and Lavian kept behind the group.

"All right, what's wrong?" Rad asked. "You two are driving me crazy! You haven't said a word since we got on the ship!"

Alicia glanced away, Lavian scratched the back of her head nervously. "...Nothing." They both replied.

Rad let out an exasperated sigh and hurried after Ai. The Murond Church wasn't too far from the southern dock. As they neared the church Alicia and Lavian stopped. The entire group paused and looked back at them, confused. Especially because Lavian was hiding behind a bush.

"...You guys go ahead," Lavian said, poking her head up from the bush. "We'll wait here."

Osamu sighed, "What's going on?"

"N-Nothing!" Both girls replied, shaking their heads.

"Then come with us already!" Ai shouted.

"But--"

"Now!" Rad added. "Geez, what's wrong? Did Ramza fire you two or something!?"

"DON'T SAY THAT NAME!" Alicia and Lavian shouted.

"What? Ramza?" Rad asked.

"What's wrong with saying Ramza?" Osamu asked.

Jokingly, Ken said, "Ramza, Ramza, Ramza!" In a sing-song voice.

Guys! Stop!" Alicia shouted, looking around. "Don't say--"

"Did you say Ramza!?"

Everyone turned to see a young apprentice from the church approaching the group. Behind him was a small group of other young priests and monks, still training. A group of a dozen in total. They looked to be a bunch of kids and young teens.

"Yeah, Ramza Beoulve," Ai said, Alicia and Lavian paled. "We got separated from him and the rest of our group a while ago, we're going back to Gallionne to meet up with him. Do you think the Church could spare a boat?"

Immediately, one of the younger apprentices in the back of the group started running back to the church, screaming, "MASTER ZALMO! MASTER ZALMO! HERETICS! MASTER ZALMO!"

"What?!" Ai shouted.

The group of apprentices drew out staves, knives and whatever weapons they could. A couple of them were also monks in training.

"GET THE HERETICS! THEY'VE COME TO ATTACK THE CHURCH!"

"HOLY AJORA, GIVE US THE STRENGTH TO CLEANSE THE WORLD OF THESE HEATHENS!"

"MAY AJORA PROTECT US!"

As the group closed in, Rad noticed reinforcements (actual fighters) coming from the church itself. "RUN!" He screamed.

The group took off running back to the docks. A small army of Clergy from Murond chased after them. The boat they had arrived on was just pulling away from the dock, everyone made a frantic leap for the side of the boat. Osamu barely made it, having to grab onto Lavian's cape.

The crew helped them back onto the deck as the army of Priests and Monks shook their fists at them, screaming, "HERETICS!" and "REPENT!" Thankfully, the ship was far enough out of range for the crew not to be able to understand them.

"What'd you guys do? Make fun of High Priest Funeral or something?" Captain Lamont asked, stepping aboard.

"...Yeah, _Alicia_, _Lavian_, what _did_ you guys do to get the church so angry?" Ai asked.

"Ah..." Alicia laughed nervously. "We accidentally stepped on a heresy examiner's foot..."

"Oh, Zalmo, right?" Lamont asked. "Yeah, come up an ounce short on a shipment of flour and he'll cast you to the lowest layer of Hell for it."

"Can you take us back to Goug?" Ken asked.

"Yeah, it's not like we can take you anywhere else." Lamont shrugged. "Current's with us for the return, so we'll be there by nightfall."

"Thanks," Ai replied, shooting a glare at Alicia and Lavian. They both laughed nervously.

To be safe, no-one mentioned 'Ramza' in front of the crew or even talked about to incident until they got back to Goug. Ai checked in at the nearest inn and everyone gathered in her room.

"Explain. Now." Rad said.

"Well, you see...When you guys were out mining, Ramza asked us to stick around with Agrias and well... There was some...unpleasantness." Lavian explained.

"Define 'unpleasantness,'" Osamu said.

"Um...You know how Cardinal Draclau was actually an evil demon possessed by the Zodiac stone?" Alicia asked.

Everyone nodded.

"Well, the church found out about how we kinda, you know, killed him, but apparently whoever told them...Left out the whole part about the evil demon and replaced it with 'Saintly Cardinal who died in the name of Holy Ajora.'" Lavian finished.

"...In other words..." Ai trailed off.

"...Ramza's...kind of been branded a heretic. When we got to Gariland, we were supposed to tell you, but then that whole burglary thing with Zero. We were going to Orbonne to get another holy stone." Alicia let out a nervous chuckle. "Kinda funny, if you...Think about it... Ha ha ha ha..."

"...Ha ha." Rad rolled his eyes.

"Okay, so, going back through Murond is out..." Ai sighed. "You know what this means, right?"

"Yeah, we gotta go through Lionel," Osamu groaned. "God help us if we hit monsters of Barius Hill-- Oh, wait! We're heretics! Someone else help us!" He stomped on the floor a couple times, looking down.

"Sorry, we wanted to tell you, but...Well..." Lavian sighed. "We were kinda worried you guys would try to...Well, Alicia and I were the only ones implicated among us, since we were there when Ramza fought with the heresy examiner--"

"We're not abandoning you or Ramza," Osamu shook his head. "Especially now," he looked to Ken, "thanks to Mister 'Ramza Ramza Ramza!'" He said in a mocking tone.

"Oh, like I knew the Church wanted his head!" Ken shouted.

"Enough," Ai came between Osamu and Ken. "We'll start to Lionel tomorrow morning."

"That could be tough," Lavian said. "Do we have enough to buy supplies _and_ pay for the ferry out of Goug?"

"We'll need a lot of supplies," Osamu said. "Barius Hill is _not_ going to be easy."

"And this inn wasn't exactly cheap." Ai sighed, "Great... We're back to where we started..."

Rad groaned, "Well, if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go down to the bar and drink enough to forget any of this ever happened."

Ken and Lavian went to join him.

"...Well, looks like it's just you and me," Osamu said. Ai started to the bar. "...Fine, i need a pot of tea anyway..."

Upon arrival to the bar, which was unusually busy. It was almost filled, save for one or two small tables. The group had to split up to two tables that were next to each other. Rad, Ken and Osamu on one, Ai, Alicia and Lavian on the other.

"Talk about busy..." Rad trailed off.

"Yeah," Ken nodded. A waitress came by to take their order. "Hey, is this place usually so busy?"

"You mean you aren't here for the contest?" The waitress replied.

Lavian spoke up, turning her head, "Contest?"

"The Goug Machinist Contest! Inventors from all over Ivalice come by to try to win the 10,000 gil prize!"

"...Ten thousand gil you say?" Osamu asked.

"Competition's pretty fierce, though," the waitress added. "A lot of groups try to sabotage each other."

This gave Alicia an idea. Once everyone placed their orders, she said, "Guys, huddle up."

Rad, Osamu and Ken got up and stood around Ai, Alicia and Lavian's table. "What is it?" Rad asked.

"She said competition is fierce, right? Why not offer our services as guards?" Lavian explained. "We're fairly good in battle, we could stand guard and couple nights and make some gil to get out of here!"

"Not a bad idea, but how do we find someone to work for?" Osamu asked.

"We'll scout out some inventors in the morning," Lavian said.

"We should try to find someone who looks likely to win," Ai added. "The more likely to win, the more they'll pay."

The drinks arrived, the group drank quickly and went back to the inn to get an early start.

However, as they neared the inn... They saw the strangest of sights.

A silver chocobo, shining in the moonlight! A HUGE silver chocobo! It kicked up an incredible amount of dust, especially on a stone road. It was far off in the distance, but looked to be coming closer. Even in the darkness, they could make out its bright yellow eyes...Though, chocobos usually didn't have bright yellow eyes.

"What the...?" Ai muttered.

The chocobo let out a frightening, low WARK as it approached. The occasional explosion sounded like it could use Chocobo Meteor!

Osamu, Ken and Lavian drew out their weapons, Ai and Alicia prepared to cast their most powerful spells. Rad hid in a half-full rain barrel.

The chocobo came to a skidding halt in front of the inn...It was then that everyone saw what it truly was. A machine. It was a mechanical chocobo that could hold eight people on its back, a row of two in the front, two rows of three in the back. Three elderly men were seated on the chocobo, one was driving it with a pair of chain pulleys.

"What are you looking at?" The driver asked. "Haven't you seen a Choco-Car before?" He had a long white beard, glasses and a black cap. He wore a black suit as well. He looked to be the oldest of the three.

"Um...Not really..." Ken shook his head.

The three men in the "Choco-Car" burst into a roaring laughter.

"Good, I'd have been worried then!" The driver said, turning off the Choco-Car and climbing off. The others got off as well.

"Are you three here for the contest?" Ai asked.

"Yeah, we'll be the winners this year!" The a short and slightly chubby man replied. He appeared the youngest (around fifty).

"To think, we will have a flying model in fifty years!" The third man shouted, he was bald with a white suit. "Too bad we won't be around long enough to build it!"

The three men laughed once more.

Rad poked his head out of the rain barrel. "So...How's it work?"

"Ah, ah, _that _is our secret!" The bald man shook his finger.

"Something like this is sure to win," Lavian stated. "But, I hear competition is fierce..."

"Yeah," the three men muttered in somewhat uninterested agreement.

"People might try to wreck your invention..." Alicia said.

"Go on..." The man driving trailed off.

"How'd you like some guards to protect it?" Ken asked.

The three men huddled together, then disbanded and said, "No!"

"What!? Why not?" Ai shouted.

"How do we know you're not here to sabotage our invention at our cost?" The driver asked.

"Would a priest lie?" Ai asked.

The three men huddled together again, then disbanded and said, "Yes!"

"What?!" Ai screamed.

"Are you implying that even a Priest is incapable of lying? And if he is, is he or she incapable of being impersonated?" Asked the bald man.

"We get that!" Alicia shouted, she was going to follow up on that explaining that Ai was, in fact, a real (and moderately trustworthy) Priest, but she was interrupted.

"Oh, good, we'll be off then," the driver lead his companions into the inn. They just left the Choco-Car by the side of the inn.

Ai sighed, "Well, either way, we can try again tomorrow..."

Ken looked over the car, "This thing is amazing!"

That night, the group awoke to a startling noise.

"WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK!"

Ai was the first to scream, "WHAT'S GOING ON!?"

"WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK!"

Rad had fallen out of bed, Ken had tripped over Rad, Osamu was guiding himself to a window with a sword-sheath, accidentally poking Lavian in the side with it as she got out of bed.

"WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK!"

Alicia slept through the whole thing.

"WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK! WARK!"

Ai was the first to the window, down below a group of figures in black clothes were running from the Choco-Car in terror. The Choco-Car's wings were flapping, the eyes were turning on and off violently and it was raising its head up and down, letting out mechanized chocobo warks.

The three men, who had the room next to Ai and the others, had their heads out of their window.

"That's what you get for trying to steal the Choco-Car!" Shouted the bald man, laughing.

"It comes alive!" The shortest man cried, laughing.

"What's going on with that thing!?" Ai shouted.

"They set off my other invention, the Choco-Car Alarm!" The man with the beard shouted. "I should problem turn it off, _nu?_"

The other two men huddled together as more people from the inn began screaming out their windows about the noise. They disbanded and said, "Yeah!_"_

The bearded man went down to turn off the alarm. "Shut up!" He shouted as he walked up to it. He kicked the side of the Choco-Car and it shut off. "Good Choco-Car! You get a candy tomorrow!" He joked as he went back into the inn.

Outside of his room, Ai waited. "...You sure you don't want protection?"

"What is this? An annoy the inventor convention?" The old man asked.

"No, we just really need money and since someone already tried to steal your invention, you might want to take extra precaution."

"Hm, very well, I will give you five hundred gil per day to watch it until the contest starts!"

Ai nodded. "Sounds good." In just a week, they would have enough to get even as far as Igros.

"Shall we shake on it?"

Ai extended her hand and shook with the old inventor. "It's a deal. Oh, but, when's the contest?"

"The day after tomorrow," the old man replied. Before Ai could object, he added, "And don't think of charging me for tonight!"

"Why not!?"

"Someone already tried to steal it right from under your nose, why should I?" The old man went into his room before Ai could object any further. "I expect better work tomorrow!"

Ai groaned, "Sneaky old man..." She went to her room to break the news to the others. Osamu and Rad volunteered to watch the Choco-Car for the rest of the night, while everyone else would take over the next day.

By the next afternoon, everyone was sitting around the Choco-Car at the entrance of the inn.

By that time, the shortest of the old men came out, "What is this? You call this guarding!?"

"What's wrong?" Ai asked, looking up from inside the Choco-Car.

"When I was a student under the great Professor Goripan, he taught me never to let people know he was watching them!" The old man exclaimed.

"Meaning?" Osamu asked, yawning. He had been taking a nap by the inn until the old man woke him up.

"Don't just sit in the Choco-Car going, 'la dee da, no-one's going to steal this,' hide around and catch any would-be thieves in the act! That is what the great Professor Goripan taught me!"

"So we should hide?" Lavian asked.

"No, you should be sitting around playing checkers!" The old man screamed. "Of course you should hide!"

"Right, right, sorry..." Lavian rolled her eyes. "All right, we're on it..."

"Hey, old man," Rad spoke up. "Who's this Professor Goripan who taught you anyhow? The old guy with the beard?"

"Him? Bah!" The old man shook his head, he started back to the inn. "I taught myself everything I know!"

"This isn't worth five hundred gil..." Ken muttered.

"We're this desperate," Ai muttered.

"We are?" Alicia asked.

"Probably not, I just want to pretend that's why I'm putting up with this..." Ai groaned.

The group started to hide around the Choco-Car.

The bald old man came out of the inn and shouted, "What kind of guards is Eugene payin' for!?"

Lavian poked her head out from a rain barrel, "We're hiding, in case some thieves show up--"

"What?! You're hiding before they get here now?!" The bald man screamed.

"No, but if they show up, we'd catch them in the act," Ai explained, crawling out from behind a bush.

"Oh, like I'm gonna believe that one after I catch you in the act!" The old man shouted. "Forget it, I'll watch this thing myself!"

"No, no, sir, please, we're watching it, really!" Ai shouted.

"I bet you were sleeping on the job!" The old man shouted.

"No, we weren't!" Ken climbed out a window from the inn.

"When I was studying under the Legendary Professor Goripan, I learned how to tell if someone's lying!" The old man crossed his arms.

"And how is that?" Ai asked.

The old man walked over to a crate by a corner of the inn. He pulled up Rad, who had fallen asleep due to taking the night watch. Rad woke up in surprise. "Because there's always evidence! ...That, and I could hear this one lying from the second floor."

"He took the night shift with me," Osamu explained.

"Then why aren't you asleep?" The old man asked.

"I took a nap while we were watching the Choco-Car earlier," Osamu explained. "Before we hid. He hasn't had more than an hour of sleep since--"

"What moron told you to hide in broad daylight, anyway!? If you planned to hide, you should do it at night when a saboteur would strike!" The old man shouted, shaking Rad and then dropping him on the ground. "Get back out and keep eye out for suspicious people! They'll want to check out the crime scene before they commit it! What moron gave you any idea otherwise?!"

Ken snapped, "That Professor you just mentioned! The shorter guy!"

"What!? What would I have to learn from that idiot!? I taught _myself _everything I know!" The old man slammed the door to the inn.

"This sucks..." Ai muttered, getting out of her hiding place with the others.

"It could be worse..." Rad muttered.

"How?" Ai asked.

"We could have been caught in Murond..." Rad yawned.

"That's debatable," Ken said.

The day went on into night. Ai, Alicia and Ken took the first watch (until midnight), while Osamu, Rad and Lavian took the watch until morning.

By morning, the old men were ready to take the Choco-Car to the contest. They insisted that the group go with them. Reluctantly they followed to the town square, where dozens of inventions were displayed.

"Just make sure nothing happens to the Choco-Car while I go check out the competition," The man with a beard said. Everyone had gathered in a covered booth to unveil the invention for the judges, add a bit of showmanship to it.

The group saluted, "Yes, sir!" The other two old men did the same.

The oldest man walked off.

"Feh, we'll win this one for sure," the shorter man said. He pat the metalic chocobo on the side.

Rad spoke up. "Hey, um... Is it supposed to leak like that?"

The two old men looked down, below the Choco-Car a pool of green liquid was forming. They then looked to each other and panicked. "Oh no! A fuel leak! Oh no!" They screamed. "This is bad!"

"He treats this thing like his own son!" The shorter man screamed.

"No, better than a son!" The bald man shouted.

"Can it be fixed?" Ai shouted. "You all invented it, right!?"

"Right, right, now's not the time to panic, but we haven't got the tools! They're back at the inn! And if the 'father' comes back and sees this to his invention, he'll kill us in cold blood!" The bald man shouted. "Wait, I know!" He pointed to Ai, Alicia and Lavian, "You three! Distract the judges!" He pointed to Osamu and Ken. "You two, distract the father!" He pointed to Rad. "You! I don't care how, get me some tools!"

The shorter man began collecting the fuel in a piece of scrap metal.

Everyone quickly split up.

Rad went from booth to booth, snatching whatever tools he could. He brought them back to the booth as the two old men began making repairs. The shorter man was under the Choco-Car, while the taller man had taken its "head" off. "We need more tools! Hurry! Hurry!" They screamed. Rad went back out for more.

On his way to another booth, he caught sight of what looked like a group of Priests and Monks from Murond. This was not a good sign! Rad spotted Lavian, she was chatting up a somewhat older judge.

Lavian hated herself for this, but said, "You know, I've always liked older men..."

"...Really?" The judge asked, a smiling spreading across his face.

Rad whispered behind Lavian. "Church is here. We're dead."

Lavian did her best to stay calm. "Excuse me..." She walked away with Rad. "Warn the others! I'll see what I can do to distract them _and_ the judges!"

"Right!" Rad dashed off in search of the others and more tools.

Osamu and Ken were holding off the old man with a beard.

"Why can't I go back to my invention?!" The old man shouted, stomping his foot on the ground.

"Well, you...You know, you haven't really told us much about yourself." Ken said. "What are your...Your...Hopes!"

"And dreams!" Osamu added.

"I hope to get back to my invention and dream of getting you two out of my sight!"

"What about your plans for the future?"

"They involve kicking you two in the face if you don't let me pass!"

Rad slipped under a covered side of the booth and dropped off more tools. The old men were about done, despite fighting over a wrench when he got there. As he went back out to warn the others, he bumped into a Priest.

"Watch it!" The Priest shouted.

"Oh, s-sorry! I didn't see you!" Rad apologized.

"...Wait, you look familiar...Have we met?" The Priest asked.

"Uh...Probably saw me...Last Sunday... Yeah!"

"...What was the sermon about?"

"...Uh...Ajora..."

"...And...?"

"...God?"

"...Well, I _guess_ that kinda checks out..." The Priest muttered. "Have you seen anyone suspicious?"

"How so?"

"We're looking for some heretics that escaped on a cargo ship from Murond--"

"I know who you're talking about!" Rad quickly said. "I heard 'em in a bar, they said they were heading to uh...Warjilis!"

"Really? Are you sure it was them!?" The Priest shouted.

"Positive! One of 'em had 'heretic' written all over his face! They mentioned this...Ah...Something-za guy...Lamza...Zamza..."

"Ramza!?"

"Yeah!"

"I need to report this...Thank you! Go with God!" The Priest ran off.

Rad let out a sigh of relief, he glanced to Ken and Osamu. They seemed to be running out of ideas. He quickly dove under the covered booth again.

"That does it! If I don't see my Choco-Car before I count to ten..." The old man growled.

Osamu and Ken sighed, letting him pass.

The old man opened the covered booth, seeing the other two men polishing the side of the Choco-Car with a couple green rags.

"Oh, you goofed! We needed another ten minutes at least!" The shorter man shouted. "We wanted to surprise him with a polish!"

The old man with a beard laughed, "So, that's what this was about! Well, then, the judges will be here soon! I'll go talk to them..." He walked off.

Ken and Osamu sighed in relief.

"You fixed it?" Ken asked.

The two men nodded.

"So, why polish it?" Osamu asked.

Rad came out from outside the booth. His green vest and hat were missing. "...Can I have them back?"

"No, need to give it a spit shine!" The short man joked, tossing Rad his hat.

"Convenient excuse for trying to stall him, no?" Rad said, putting his hat and vest back on.

The judging was complete. After a quick test drive, the Choco-Car was determined the winner.

The old man with a beard gave a short victory speech to the crowd.

"I want to thank the city of Goug for this prize. It is an honor that my Choco-Car should win this contest. When I was a young man, living in Goug, I learned everything from the magnificent Professor Goripan! It is thanks to him, I won this award."

Osamu looked to the bald man. "So, you're his Professor?"

"_Feh_, what? Me? Compared to him, I'm an idiot!" The old bald man shouted, motioning the man with a beard. "He taught himself everything he knows!"

The group shrugged with a sigh.

After the contest, a quick victory drink at the bar lead to the old man with a beard confronting Ai outside of her room.

"This is your payment," the old man said, holding up a leather pouch. "But, there's a rule!" He pulled it back before she could accept it. "You'll be going out of town, won't you?"

"How'd you know?"

"A hunch," The old man chuckled. "You can't open this until you've left town."

"Why?"

"I'm the great inventor here, no asking questions!" The old man snapped. "Just open it after you've left town!"

"Trust us, we'll know!" The bald man said, walking up behind the old man with a beard. The shorter man was behind him.

The shorter man spoke up, "Yeah, you can't put one over on students of Professor Goripan!"

"...Who _is_ this professor guy, anyway?" Ai asked.

The three old men bust into laughter and walked into their room.

Ai shrugged. Everyone started to pack up, bought what supplies they could without opening their payment (which everyone began to theorize was empty) and left for Lionel.

They were on a ferry to Lionel when Rad spoke up, "Think we're far enough out of town yet?"

Ai shrugged and open the pouch. Inside was two thousand gil and a letter:

_Heretics! We've alerted the church of your whereabouts!_

Ha ha ha, just kidding!

Saw you guys runnin' out of Murond on our way to Goug,  
thought you could use some money getting to Lionel or wherever  
it is you need to go. Best of luck in your journeys, hope we didn't  
give you too much trouble!

-The Goripan Brothers

Ai looked up. "The...Goripan...brothers?"

Rad shrugged. "...They taught themselves everything they knew..."

To Be Continued...

_Notes:_

...I suppose it is time to come clean. I am not the original author of Propositions, nor the original holder of this account. The original writer (Shibaryou\Kenji) had left to pursue a literary career. He has given me control of this series and his FFN account after much...Well, to be honest, begging.

The original chapters are roughly the same, save for corrected errors and some edits for continuity purposes (requested by Shibaryou).

I'm sorry for the deception, but he asked me not to reveal this until I wrote my own chapter of Propositions. Don't worry, the story will go along with his intended storyline, I was given a detailed summary of the series as well as character descriptions and details.

I hope you will continue reading despite the series' change of hands.

-"Shibaryou"


	9. Challenge Of Zero

Propositions  
Chapter IX: Challenge of Zero! -or- Judgment! The Law Must Be Upheld!

Lionel, quite possibly the last place anyone wanted to be...

Everyone was keeping a low profile. An attempt to use fake names failed when Rad, Ken and Lavian couldn't remember who was who, leading to an awkward situation with an innkeeper and the multiple Schtolteheim Reinbach IIIs. Because of this, they had to stay at another inn across town, to avoid even more suspicion.

Wanted posters were still up for the murderers of Cardinal Draclau. Upon seeing them in a small village on the way to Lionel, most of the money the Goripan brothers had given them was spent on disguises more than supplies. Osamu and Ken were a pair of wizards, while Ai was a monk. Lavian was dressed as a summoner, Alicia was a samurai and, finally, Rad was a calculator. The disguises managed to fool the gate guards, especially considering that their uniforms were secondhand clothing they got from a merchant in the swamplands between Goug and Lionel (which also explained the prices they paid). They got whatever fit.

"Do we have any money left for supplies?" Osamu asked, scratching his chest. He _hated_ his wizard disguise. The cheap fabric was giving him a rash. They were in their room at the inn, avoiding suspicion from the innkeeper this time.

"I counted it last night," Ai replied. "Normally, yes, we would. However, according to the fur shop back in Warjilis, the monsters on Barius Hill are getting out of their best mating season in the past century. Meaning, a lot of monsters. We need to pack extra of everything. In fact, I'd even suggest buying better weapons and armor before heading back to Igros."

"Especially you, Osamu," Ken spoke up.

"Hey! My blood sword has gotten me out of tough times before!" Osamu snapped.

"No, that would be my sharpshooting, that stupid sword is not only 'blood red' from rust, but it hasn't been sharpened or even maintenanced in, what, a year?" Ken replied.

"Since Osamu got it, anyway," Rad chimed in. "I'd say a decade from looking at it."

Osamu grumbled, "You're all just jealous because _my_ sword is legendary."

"Only because it started rusting in Ajora's time," Ken said.

"Enough!" Ai shouted. "All of us need better equipment, I've already heard stories of poorly equipped hunters from the bar downstairs. I don't want it happening to us, especially considering the situation Ramza is probably in!"

"A good point," Alicia said. "Ramza's in more trouble than we are, he's got a more famous name than we do, and his brothers have probably disowned him for this whole heretic thing."

"Exactly," Ai said. "We need to find him and help him. You guys saw Queklain, what if there's more like him?"

Rad shuddered, "I still can't believe we survived that battle..."

"You weren't put to sleep by his 'nightmare' attack, it's like dreaming in Hell," Lavian said. "I lived out my worst fears in my dreams..."

"What were they?" Ken asked.

"...My graduation year from Gariland... ...I gave a speech to the entire graduating class... Naked." Lavian replied.

"...Wish I was there," Rad said. Lavian immediately smacked him. "Ow!"

"Well, at least our travel fund can supply us with liquor," Ken got up. "I'm thirsty."

"Great, even less money," Ai muttered, getting up as well.

"What? A good source of bar nuts is a necessity," Rad said, going to the door. They all went downstairs to the bar, ordered drinks (tea for Osamu, spirits for everyone else) and discussed plans.

As they drank, a knight wearing a pair of glasses came up to them, "Excuse me, have you seen any suspicious figures in Lionel?"

"Not us-- I mean, no we haven't," Ken replied with a nervous chuckle. "Who are you looking for?"

"Viscount Bafai, the nobleman temporarily presiding over the city, has received a threat from the Phantom Thief," the knight explained, hoping up a wanted poster.

Everyone immediately recognized him, letting out a groan. It was Zero.

"You know Zero!?" The knight shouted.

"Robbed some art in Gariland, robbed us in Warjilis, tried to rob a casino ship we were guarding in Warjilis... Yeah, we know him." Ai replied, downing some ale.

"Wonderful! A gift from God!" The knight cheered, grinning ear-to-ear.

"What do you mean?" Rad asked.

"Our Lord Bafai is putting up extra security, sparing no expensive! The Phantom Thief has sworn to steal his most valued treasure, you see."

"...Which is?" Alicia asked.

"He has so many, he's...actually not sure." The knight scratched his head in confusion. "The staff is actually wagering on what it is. The favorite is his Zeni Sword, but I think it's his solid gold statue of himself with the ruby eyes."

"Solid gold statue of _himself?_" Osamu asked.

"He's...not the most modest of people," the knight trailed off. "Still, we're quite short of help, and since you've dealt with Zero before, you would know all of his tricks, right?"

"I guess... But, we don't work cheap..." Ai trailed off, grinning.

"Not a problem! I'm sure Lord Bafai will pay handsomely, especially for such a group!" The knight said. "The only help we've been able to get is from squires from the local academy, most of truly skilled fighters are off to war or helping the church in their hunt for the demons that killed our beloved Lord Draclau."

Lavian choked on her drink, but quickly regained her composure, saying with a cough, "Truly sad, a good man, a good man..."

"So, you will help us?" The knight asked. "The thief said he would strike this very night!"

"Tonight? A little confident, isn't he?" Ai asked.

"He does this whenever he pulls a major heist, it's his tradition to taunt the nobility and those who uphold justice!" The knight withdrew his sword, held it pointing to heaven and said, "We Knights of Lionel swear to forever uphold the law and bring justice to the wicked! May we surrender our lives for justice!"

"In that case, let's go dispense justice!" Osamu stood up, cheering. He held his wizard's staff forward in a dramatic pose.

"For justice!" Rad leapt up, holding up his used calculator's staff over his head and cheering.

"JUSTICE!" Ken hopped onto the table, holding his wizard staff up in the air.

Lavian raised her hands as if summoning, "FOR JUSTICE!"

The knight also joined in the array of poses by standing in front of the group and holding his sword forward, "MAY JUSTICE PREVAIL!" All of them screamed.

"...Morons..." Ai and Alicia muttered under their breath. Neither had gotten up.

"Hey! Merlin! Get off my table!" The bartender shouted, directed toward Ken.

The entire group realized how carried away they got and sat back down.

The knight cleared his throat, "S-So...Will you help us?"

"It's a deal," Ai raised her mug. "For justice."

"JUSTICE!" Rad shouted, raising his mug. Osamu and Ken smacked him in the back of the head. "Ow!"

The knight paid for their drinks and room at the inn, moved greatly by the group's devotion to the cause of justice. Though Ai took a few extra minutes to pack a bag of supplies for the trip. He lead them straight to Viscount Bafai's mansion, where Bafai was holding a brief security council with his knights and squires.

Bafai was a middle-aged man, somewhat morbidly obese. He wore brightly colored clothing and many, many rings on each finger. He also had a dark blue, sapphire pendant around his neck. "Report?"

The knight knelt down, the group of 'mercenaries' knelt with him. "Lord Bafai, these mercenaries have volunteered to help our cause for justice--"

Immediately, every Knight in the room withdrew their sword and screamed, "MAY WE SURRENDER OUR LIVES FOR JUSTICE!" They then sheathed their swords. The volunteer squires and few other mercenaries in the large chamber barely had time to cover their ears.

"Who are they?" Bafai asked.

"Terra," Ai bowed her head. "A Pr--A monk from Gariland Academy to the North, top of my class." Ai lied, though she was one of the better Priests from Gariland.

"Tifa, a samurai who can cut a fly in half blindfolded," Alicia lied, bowing her head.

"Quistis," Lavian bowed her head. "I once summoned three monsters at once."

"Squall," Osamu stood up, bowing his head.

"Zidane," Ken bowed his head. "We're skilled wizards without equal!"

"If you are both without equal, then which of you is better than the other?" Bafai asked, grinning.

"I can turn a man into a frog just by thinking about it," Osamu added.

"I can turn a man into _two_ frogs just by thinking about it." Ken said, proudly.

"...Well I can turn a man into two _poisoned_ frogs just by thinking about it!" Osamu glared at Ken.

"I can cast Holy, I win," Ken grinned.

"I can cast Ultima, _I_ win!" Osamu shouted.

"I can cast Ultima, Holy _and_ summon Zodiac!" Ken said.

"Hey! Only _I_ can summon Zodiac!" Lavian piped in.

"Enough," Bafai said with a laugh. "Such...interesting mercenaries." He then looked to Rad. "You!"

"Y-Yes?" Rad asked.

"You look like a calculator, but I hear male calculators are required to shave their heads..." Bafai commented.

"I...uh... My barber is...booked for months..." Rad replied.

"Well, then... Lezales," he motioned to the knight that brought the group in.

"Yes, Lord Bafai?" Lezales asked.

"Escort them to the storehouse," Bafai ordered. "Except for you," he pointed to Rad. "I have a special job for you."

Rad gulped. "Y-Yes, sir."

"Come with me. The rest of you are dismissed to your regular duties." Bafai lead Rad out of the room. Once they turned down an empty hall. he spoke, "...Now, ah..."

"Schtolteheim Reinbach III, lord," Rad replied.

"Ah, Schtolteheim, you know that Nobles are the most important figures in Ivalice, right?" Bafai asked.

"Of course, sir," Rad nodded.

"Now, do you know how nobles _stay_ noble?"

"Through their vast wealth?" Rad asked.

"Very good, and how do they _keep_ their vast wealth?" Bafai asked.

"Um...Taxation upon the common class?" Rad replied.

"Close, close," Bafai laughed. "That is part, but even Nobles are taxed, you know... Which is why I need your help, my fine young _calculator."_

"What do you need?" Rad asked, mentally begging it wasn't related to being a calculator.

"Although I'm sure your skills in battle are top-notch, I would much rather use your services in here..." He took Rad to his private chambers. He went to a desk and pulled a large pile of papers from a drawer. He placed them on the desk, saying, "I've unfortunately, had to endure a large spending period on some rare antiques and other taxable commodities. Now, I want you to make...certain assets...Disappear on paper."

"Sir, are you asking me to help you cheat on your taxes?" Rad asked.

"I prefer to think of it as...'Creatively filing' my taxes." Bafai replied with a smile.

"Why me?"

"My last calculator met an unfortunate end after he requested a cut of a church grant he obtained for me," Bafai replied. "You're not a greedy person, are you Schtolteheim?"

"N-No, sir!" Rad saluted. "I'll get to creatively filing right away, sir."

"Wonderful, I'll be sure to reward you for your hard efforts. Ta-ta." Bafai left the room.

Rad looked to the papers. "...Now what do I do?" He looked to one paper. "...Form A...Do not fill out form A until you have filled out form B..." He got another paper. "Form B...Do not fill out from B until you've filled out form 42J... ...Form 42J... ...Do not fill out form 42J until you have filled out form A..." Rad sighed. "I'm going to be here a while..."

Outside of the mansion was a large store house of Bafai's various antiques, treasures and jewelry. The group waited within the chamber, which had a glass ceiling and various glass windows lined throughout it. The treasures were either placed on shelves (antiques), in chests (jewelry and gold coin) or laid about (statues). There was also many paintings on the wall, most of Lord Bafai.

"So...Why does Bafai keep all of his treasure in one convenient room?" AI asked.

"He loves to walk around in this room and admire his many treasures," Lezales explained. "He so loves his exotic weapons as well," Lezales motioned to a series of dozens of weapons lining the wall between two large landscapes of Bafai's mansion. All of them rare, some of them antiques, and a couple of them had Osamu going crazy.

"No way! Another blood sword!" Osamu shouted. "And this...No way! An excalibur!? I thought only Thunder God Cid had one of these!" Osamu then ran to examine a sword. "The Save the Queen!? Only the highest ranked Shrine Knights get one of these!"

"A bit of a sword fanatic, for a wizard..." Lezales commented.

"I had a collection back at home, nothing like this, though," Osamu replied. "I'm a bit of an expert when it comes to rare swords..."

"What about this one?" Lezales motioned to a sword, it looked to be made of all coins.

"A Zeni-Blade?" Osamu examined the sword hanging on the wall. All of the coins were tied together tightly with red string and held in place with sharpened wire. Each coin was also sharpened, save for the ones on the 'hilt,' all around. "Rare, used mostly for ceremony and as gifts to nobility, but I've heard stories of assassins once using them. Assumed to be a good luck charm until you realize its cut your head off, you know?" Osamu examined the blade. "Still sharp, amazing since none had really been made in the past few centuries... I always liked their design."

"Very good, you are an expert," Lezales clapped. "if you'll excuse me, I have to attend to some other matters. Make yourselves comfortable and if you need anything, ring for a servant."

"Thanks," Ai said. "We'll keep a close watch on everything."

"We won't let Zero take anything!" Ken added. "I'll turn him into a couple poisoned frogs, then blast him with Holy and Ultima!"

Lezales laughed, "Good luck, then!" He left with a bow.

"Nice guy," Lavian commented.

"Yeah, good thing we ran into him," Alicia said.

"WHOAH! IS THIS A REAL CHAOS BLADE!?" Osamu shouted, then, disappointedly, said, "No...Just a replica..."

The rest of the group sighed, shaking their heads.

Ai put a large bag down in front of the group. "I packed all of our usual weapons before we left, there's no way we'll be able to hold off _any_ thieves without them."

In Bafai's private quarters, Rad was taking a break from picking a form at random and filling it out to the best of his abilities...Which was pretty much Bafai's name...Which he wasn't sure was spelt right. It had been hours and Rad had only finished about half of the forms. It was past sunset, Rad let out a yawn as a servant brought him some tea.

"Thanks," Rad nodded his head, looking up at the servant. She was quite pretty, with smooth, clear skin, long blond hair. Rad felt he saw her before. "...You look familiar..."

"Tee hee! Lord Rad is just nice to all the ladies! Tee hee!" The young woman replied.

"No, no, you look familiar..." Rad took a sip of his tea, he felt a bit strange. Almost...drunk... "You're cute, too... What's your name?"

"Tee hee! You wouldn't like me! I'm a naughty girl!"

"...Go on..." A grin spread accross Rad's face.

"I put some naughty, naughty sleeping powder in your tea! Tee hee!" The young servant drew out a paper fan and fanned herself with it.

That didn't disturb Rad as much as the next words out of the servant as he fell, face first on Bafai's desk.

"And," she said in a deeper voice, "I'm not a woman."

Rad would go on to have a nightmare.

The 'girl' went to the window and motioned down to two figures. One was hidden in the shadows, while the other was fairly old for a squire with black hair and a black beard. The squire motioned for the girl to come down.

In the store house, Osamu was still studying weapons, while the others were sitting around a statue of a legendary king named Mesa. The entire storehouse was lit up with candles lining the walls.

The door opened, everyone immediately reached for their weapons. A servant walked in, carrying a tray of tea. She smiled. "Lord Bafai has asked me to bring you some tea."

"Oh, thanks," Ken said as the servant brought the tea over to the group.

Alicia spoke up, "What kind of tea is this?"

"Black tea, of course," the servant replied.

Osamu quickly lost interest in the weapons and went to the tea pot. "Good! I've been dying for a good cup, the stuff at the bar was horrible." The servant offered him the first cup she poured. Osamu sipped it. "...This isn't black tea..."

"What?" The girl asked.

"Black tea tends to have a smooth flavor with a hint of fruit near the end...This is bitter." Osamu said.

"No, no, it's simply high quality black tea. The nobility likes bitter tea..." The servant let out a nervous laugh.

"Try it, this is the worst tea I've ever had." Osamu offered the cup.

"N-No, thank you, I don't like tea," the servant girl shook her head.

"Just...try it-- Oops..." Osamu, a bit clumsy, dropped the tea cup. It shattered. "Oh...Sorry..." Osamu yawned. "Man, what happened to me...?"

"I knew it!" Alicia shouted, leaping up and grabbing the servant. "You tried to poison us!"

"No! No! I don't know what you're talking about!" The servant screamed.

"Wait, you knew...So...I was your...guinea...pig...? Thanks...a lot..." Osamu slowly knelt to the floor and curled up like a dog. He fell asleep.

"GUARDS! GUARDS!" Ken shouted, going to the door. "WE CAUGHT THE THIEF!"

Lezales walked into the store house. "What's the problem, Ken?"

"We caught the thief! She poisoned Osamu with a sleeping potion!"

"Don't be silly," Lezales laughed. "He's not the thief." He pointed to the servant, who was being held tight by Alicia.

"...Wait... HE?!" Alicia let go of the servant in shock.

A squire walked in after Lezales. The servant 'girl' ran to his arm, whimpering, "They were so mean to me!"

"...R-Right..." The squire rolled his eyes.

"...L-Lezales...?!" Lavian spoke up.

Lezales chuckled, "...A summoner with a sword, a wizard with a crossbow, a monk with a Priest's staff, and a Samurai with an Oracle's rod... ...Not to mention the Blood Sword fanatic down there..." He motioned to Osamu. "Really, so pathetic... I saw through your little ruse at the bar."

"Wa-Wait! You think we're...working for Zero!?" Ai asked.

Lezales laughed, "What sort of idiot would I be to hire idiots like you?" Lezales took off his glasses and pulled off a wig. He was, in fact, The Phantom Thief Zero.

"...Aw, geez..." Ken muttered.

"Now...Kensuke...Tsubasa..." Zero looked to the 'squire,' who drew out a sword and the servant, who simply smiled. "...Kill them..."

"HOLD EVERYTHING!"

"What the?!" Zero looked outside. A man in full armor on a yellow chocobo charged at the storehouse. "Kensuke! Bar the door!"

Kensuke quickly slammed the door and held it shut with his weight.

"I don't understand!" Tsubasa shook his head. "I even knocked out that thief-turned-mathematician! Who could that--"

The man and the chocobo crashed through a window and skidded to a halt between the group.

"Who are you?" Zero asked.

The man spoke, "I am Judge Master Bergan LXVI. I have come to uphold Justice!"

"...So you're another justice-obsessed whack-job? What is _with_ this place?" Kensuke muttered.

"Incorrect! I am a Judge!" Bergan replied. "This is my faithful steed, Archades."

The chocobo let out a proud WARK and raised its left wing.

"We travel the land to uphold the laws!" Bergan saluted as well.

"...So, you're here to help us capture Zero?" Lavian asked.

"Incorrect! I am a Judge! Judges uphold the laws of battle, we are only allowed to interfere in a fight _if_ the laws of battle are broken!" Bergan explained.

"And if a law is broken?" Ai asked.

Bergan reached under his armor and pulled out a yellow card. "You receive this!"

"...And?" Tsubasa asked.

"If you continue to break the law, you receive another! And another! Until, finally, you receive..." With a shudder, Bergan pulled out a red card. "_This_."

"Which is...?" Ken asked.

"A ticket to jail, where you will tried and, if found guilty, punished for your crimes!" Bergan announced.

"...And why are you here, exactly?" Zero asked. "I mean, it's war-time, battles are goin' on all over the place."

"This battle is being viewed as a battle of honor," Bergan explained. "Your letter to Viscount Bafai, as said, 'Beloved Lord Bafai, I have come to steal your treasure. Sincerely, The Phantom Thief Zero.' Our organization views this as a declaration of a battle of honor and thus, this battle falls under our jurisdiction."

"...Where have you been all the other times we've done this?" Zero asked. "I've been doing this whole 'battle of honor' thing as you put it for years."

"Yes, but until recently, our services have been limited to only the land surrounding the former Archadian empire. It's now that we've finally branched out into other lands. Sure, there are few of us, and it is a thankless job with little pay, but..." Bergan wept. "The feeling of knowing you...made a difference...Makes this job...Worthwhile..."

Archades also let out a tearful wark and wiped its eyes with its wings. "Wark...! Wark...!"

"...Oh, for the love of..." Zero groaned. "Tsubasa, you sure you didn't give _me_ any of your special tea? This has to be a dream."

"I am starting to consider the possibility, sir," Tsubasa replied.

"Now then!" Bergan announced, having Archades leap into the air and atop a statue. The chocobo remained perfectly balanced. "I declare this to be a battle of honor! Todays law is..." Bergan reached into his armor, pulling out a blue card. "No Holy Actions! Holy is officially banned, save for Weapons!"

"...Holy...Actions...?" Alicia asked.

"No...praying...?" Ai shrugged.

"Whatever! Let's just get started here!" Zero screamed, obviously annoyed. Kensuke and Tsubasa charged.

Ken went to fire an arrow at Tsubasa, but Kensuke managed to catch it in mid-air. Alicia focused on trying to cast spells on Kensuke (as Zero and Tsubasa both equipped ribbons, thus preventing status spells), while Lavian protected Ai as she tried to wake up Osamu.

"Heavenly wind, carry us to the fountain of power. Esuna..." Ai cast the spell on Osamu.

Osamu woke up, startled by a loud whistle.

"HOLD EVERYTHING!" Bergan cried, holding a whistle in his left hand, pointing at Ai with his right. Archades let out a series of distressed warks as he leapt down to the battle. "A direct violation of the law! No Holy Actions! Esuna, being white magic, falls under that category!"

Ai rolled her eyes. The battle actually halted with Zero holding Ken in a headlock, Lavian and Kensuke charging at eachother in slow motion (the result of an exchange of slow spells between Alicia and Tsubasa) and Alicia about to strike Tsubasa over the head with her staff. "Wait, so, you're telling me, any white magic spell is forbidden?"

"Any! As well as the use of phoenix down and certain summons!" Bergan explained. "However, you may still use holy weapons!"

"...So, if I _read_ a bible, you get upset and I get another card, right?" Ai asked. Bergan nodded. "_But_, if I smacked someone with it, no harm, no foul?"

"Correct!" Bergan nodded.

"...Quick show of hands, who else is getting annoyed?" Ai asked.

Everyone except Osamu, who was still trying to figure out what was going on, raised their hands.

"Good..." Ai grinned. "...Bright light..."

Bergan's eyes widened, Archades began to panic. "N-Now see here! I'll give you one chance to halt that spell!"

Everyone, realizing that Ai was about to cast holy, of all spells, in doors began to scramble to find a safe hiding place.

"NOT AGAIN!" Osamu screamed.

"...Shine down on bloody impurity..."

Bergan reached into his armor. "A-Attacking a judge is--"

"HOLY!" Ai screamed, taking a second yellow card from Bergan as the spell formed above him.

"--FORBIDDEN...!" Bergan screamed as the spell launched him through the ceiling, still on Archades.

Ai let out a happy sigh, "That felt..." She turned around, only to see that her spell destroyed most of the antiques, weaponry, paintings, statues and caused severe structural damage to the storehouse. "...Uh-oh..."

In Bafai's quarters, Rad woke up after hearing the cries of Bergan and Archades. "Cross-dresser! Creepy! Bad things!" He looked around the room. "Oh...Oh...Ju-Just a nightmare..." He also looked at the time. "Ah! I gotta finish this! Bafai'll kill me!"

At the store house, the three thieves and others looked over the damage.

"...I think it's in the best interest of all of us that we pretend this never happened." Ai said.

"The words of the one who destroyed everything..." Osamu muttered.

Zero went over to a fallen shelf. "Ha! They survived!"

Everyone got ready to fight.

"Lord Zero, given the events, is now really the time to continue stealing?" Tsubasa asked.

"Of course," Zero chuckled, picking up a weapon. "Kill them and help me with these weapons!"

As everyone else fought Kensuke and Tsubasa, Osamu went for Zero. "Wait! You came for the weapons?!"

"Of course, weapons are in my best interest right now." Zero said, he spotted Osamu's blood sword. "Hm... Interesting..."

Osamu stood defensively, "Wh-What is it?"

"A blood sword...You see, my friend, I am a collector of rare weapons...And I also like to pride myself as a skilled weapons dealer. I saw you're a bit of an expert earlier, so you can appreciate the value of some of these...Especially considering the times we live in." Zero held up an excalibur. "Now, do you want to play around with your little blood sword and my little excalibur, or shall we all just go about _our own business?_"

Osamu glanced back. Kensuke and Tsubasa were by far too much for the others. Everyone was struggling just to maintain a decent defense. "...And in exchange?"

"Your blood sword," Zero replied.

Osamu glanced at his sword. "But--"

The sound of Ken screaming helped Osamu reach a decision, a successful bolt spell from Tsubasa sent him flying into a wall.

"...Deal." Osamu sighed, sheathing his blood sword and passing it to Zero.

"Good, good," Zero took the sword. "KENSUKE! TSUBASA!"

Both Tsubasa and Kensuke stopped fighting, looking to Zero.

"Help me with these weapons, we're heading out, leave 'em be." Zero grinned. He looked to Osamu, taking the zeni-sword from the ground. "Here, a little bonus for your help." He passed it to Osamu.

"No, thanks..." Osamu shook his head.

"Come now, it's not like Bafai'll ever see it again either way." Zero chuckled. Osamu reluctantly took it. "Good."

Ai groaned, "Osamu?"

"Guys, we need to find Rad and get out of here," Osamu said. "Did you put Bafai to sleep?"

"Everyone, sleeping like babies," Zero replied. "No worries."

"Thanks," Osamu sighed.

Rad had just finished Bafai's tax forms, rushing most of them to the point of making educated guesses. It was getting past midnight by the time he finished. Just as he made the last pen stroke, Ai came into the room.

"Rad, Zero took everything. We're out of here before Bafai wakes up and blames us!"

"What?! How'd he get past you guys?" Rad shouted.

"He's tough," Ken spoke from the hallway, letting out a cough. "He had his two bodyguards from the casino ship with him. Now let's go! Bafai'll kill us when he sees the store house! Ai blew it up!"

"...Seriously?" Rad asked.

"Long story, idiot judge, let's run!" Ai groaned. That was not one of her proudest nights.

As they hurried back to the inn, Osamu examined his new zeni-sword and sighed...

To Be Continued...

_Notes: Shiba's notes mentioned that he wanted to parody FFTA's law system in this chapter with Judge Bergan (named after the FFXII judge, my own idea). He's more or less involved with any Zero-related chapters. His intros and character are...Well, here's a comment from Shibaryou's notes about Bergan:_

"I swear, I did not come up with this guy while playing FFTA and watching Medabots! Really!"

Yeah, this project is that old.

The name Schtolteheim Reinbach III is actually a reference to the Suikoden series, Shibaryou wanted me to use it as a fake name in this series every now and then (like in Suikoden).

In the game, the job report mentions the group taking a treasure Zero left behind and running off. I expanded upon that idea with more of a reason as to why our heroes would want to get out of there so quickly.

As for the loss of the blood sword. Shibaryou noted that he wanted Osamu to lose it at some point, this was due to the fact that in his main file for propositions info, the sword was broken and he accidentally saved after the battle. He decided to use it in the plot. Not sure how this is going to go, though. I need to ask him.

The next two chapters are the Proposition "My Little Carrot" and a special chapter. Sorry that this one took so long, I was busy with school work.

-"Shibaryou"


	10. My Little Carrot

Propositions  
Chapter X: My Little Carrot -or- Preparation! Barius Hill Part I!

Ai grumbled to herself, pounding on the door to a restroom at the inn. "Osamu, come out!"

No response.

"He's been in there for five hours, now," Ken said. "I understand he's mourning the loss of his sword, but could have picked a place to be alone I _don't_ need to use!" Ken pounded on the door. "Osamu! At least come out so I can go in!"

It had been three days since the battle against Zero. Alicia, Lavian and Ken had been nursing battle wounds, especially Lavian who had been on the receiving end of a few spells and break attacks from Tsubasa and Kensuke. Kensuke had broken her shield during the battle, which may have cracked the bone in her arm. A few healing spells from Ai helped, but weren't quite enough.

Osamu had spent those days in silent depression, apparent by switching from tea to liquor at the bar. Currently he was confining himself in a restroom for privacy.

Fortunately, an investigation launched by Bafai into their arrest for "assisting Zero" was called off after authorities arrested him for tax fraud. It was the worst case in Lionel history, not because he had been cheating on them his whole life, but by how badly he cheated on them that year. A statement from Bafai blamed it on sabotage from "an idiot who couldn't calculate his way through a paper bag."

They had ditched their new outfits and went back to their old ones. The investigation into the death of Draclau officially ended with Ramza Beoulve and his associates, Mustadio Bunansa and Agrias Oakes as the culprits. No official word on what had happened to them, however. There were, however, rumors spreading of a massacre at Orbonne Monastery in which Shrine Knights had been called to investigate. No word on who was involved.

Osamu finally stepped out of the restroom, his eyes were red with tears.

"...You...feeling okay?" Lavian asked.

"...I miss my blood sword..." Osamu sighed, "If anyone needs me, I'll be at the bar..."

"Or in bed, sleeping off last night's binge..." Ai rolled her eyes. Their drink budget was running short, mostly thanks to Osamu.

"Yeah, whatever, have fun!" Ken pushed Osamu aside and dashed into the restroom. Osamu just walked off, whimpering.

"Sword..." Osamu sighed.

"He was pretty attached to that stupid thing..." Rad commented once Osamu had left.

"He stole it himself from Gafgarion, who wasn't all that pleased to lose it," Ai explained. "He heard rumor that Gafgarion had obtained a legendary sword and spent weeks trying to master that single ability for the next time we encountered him."

"Maybe we're a little hard on that sword, it wasn't _that_ bad of a weapon," Alicia said.

"Are you kidding? The only reason the blade was red was because of rust!" Ai shouted. "And to think he kept it so long."

"I think we're missing the point, Osamu sacrificed his prized sword to save our butts," Lavian pointed out.

"So he values us above rust?" Ken asked through the restroom door.

"Ken, are you decent right now?" Lavian asked.

"Not exactly."

"Good, 'cause if you were, I'd go in there and smack you for that," Lavian growled. "You guys don't get it, a Knight's weapon is like a part of their own body. Ai, you through staves with no problem, Ken's been wanting a new crossbow for ages, Rad you steal weapons, among other things, for the fun of it. To Osamu, that sword was a part of him!"

"...So, what do we do to make him feel better?" Alicia asked.

"It's not like blood swords are a dime a dozen," Ai pointed out. "We can't just replace it."

"Should've snagged that chaos blade replica," Rad said. "I mean, come on, a guy in battle sees something that _looks_ like a chaos blade, he's not gonna stick around."

"Not until he sees the 'Made in Dalmasca' engraving on the base of the blade," Ai replied.

Osamu came back into the room. "Ai, this might interest you..." He gave Ai a piece of paper.

"What?!" Ai growled. It was a wanted poster with a crude drawing of her with devil horns breathing fire. "Wanted. Unholy Priestess, Dead or Alive. Wanted for evading arrest, breaking battle laws, attacking a judge..." Ai growled, crumpling up the poster and throwing it to the ground.

Alicia picked it up and continued reading, "Reward is 10,000 gil. Report claims to Judge Bergan and Archades... Looks like your holy spell didn't finish him off."

"Sadly," Ai grumbled. "Amazing, Zero breaks and enters Bafai's compound to steal weapons and _I'm_ wanted for casting a holy spell!"

"At least we're clean of the Draclau charges," Rad said, he noticed Osamu was going back to the bar. "Hey! Osamu! Come on, cheer up!"

"...No..." Osamu sighed, leaving.

"This is getting both annoying and pathetic..." Alicia muttered.

"As I said, to a knight, a weapon is like a part of them." Lavian said.

"Yeah, yeah..." Ai rolled her eyes.

"Well, Osamu and I have one thing in common," Rad spoke up. "We both need a drink." He went downstairs.

In the bar, Osamu was on his first drink. Next to him was a young squire, drinking chocolate milk and almost crying into it. "...What's wrong?"

"I lost her pet..." The squire replied, looking to Osamu. "You?"

"I lost my sword..." Osamu replied.

"I once had a sword broken...It hurts, especially the shrapnel..." The squire sighed.

Rad sat on the other side of the squire. "Geez, Osamu, you're making everyone depressed..."

"I lost Carrot! The Countess is going to have my head for it..." The squire sighed. "I was walking her near the base of Barius Hill when she snapped her leash and ran off..."

"Tough break, I heard Barius hill is complete chaos right now. Great for the poaching industry, bad for everyone else." Rad said. "Carrot's probably monster chow now."

The squire burst into tears, Osamu joined him.

"CARROT!"

"MY SWORD!"

Rad rolled his eyes, waving to the bartender. "Something hard...Make it two."

"For them?" The bartender asked.

"No, for me."

Ai came into the bar and sat on the other side of the group. "Great, what now?"

"I lost Countess Zamas' precious Carrot..." The squire wept.

"...Precious _Carrot?_" Ai asked.

"Her beloved pet, she loves it so much. More than anything else!" The squire went on, "She would give her life for her precious Carrot! Oh, once she finds out that she got loose, my head will be on a chopping block!"

"Why not escape and join us?" Rad asked. "We're heading up North."

"I could never abandon my post," the squire said. "It is my duty to report the news to the Countess, I simply wish to enjoy my last day."

"Have fun with that, hope it's a quick one," Rad shrugged, downing a drink.

"Rad!" Ai shouted, turning to the squire. "You're looking for a pet, right?"

"Y-Yes," the squire nodded.

"We're a bit short of cash, we need to buy supplies to get past Barius Hill. Not to sound greedy, but if you could help us on that front..." Ai trailed off.

The squire immediately got up and bowed his head, "Priestess, if you would retrieve Carrot, I would gladly serve you in this life and the next!"

"...Money would be enough," Ai stated.

"Without question, I'll give you my entire week's pay." The squire reached into his pocket and handed over a few gil coins. "Use this to buy any supplies you need to find her, I'll be here until you bring her back! Carrot will be wearing a red collar with a gold name tag. Thank you! Thank you!"

"Anytime," Ai smiled, "I'll tell my friends and we'll be out in a few minutes."

"A thousand--No! A million thanks to you!" The squire was just short of kissing Ai's feet, not that she'd mind of course.

Ai went upstairs, alerting the others, "We have a job, one that might get us enough to go through Barius Hill tomorrow."

"What is it?" Ken asked. "Better not involve nobility again..."

"Just a squire working for a Countess," Ai explained. "We're going to hunt for her pet, it's named Carrot. The squire lost it and, well, is willing to pay anything to get it back."

"Where'd he lose it?" Lavian asked.

"Base of Barius," Ai replied.

"...It's long gone, Ai, just buy the countess a book on coping with loss," Ken said.

"Yeah," Alicia nodded. "Her little doggy or whatever is history."

"Come on, it's not like there are that many monsters at the base of Barius, only when you get near the summit. We can just look around a little, if we see a monster, we go back. It's not like I'm expecting you guys to go charging into battle unarmed--" With saying that, Ai looked at the gil the squire gave her, sighing, "We do need to buy Osamu a new sword, though. He doesn't have a back up, aside from that antique zeni-sword...Which we might have to sell for money."

"How much did he give you?" Lavian asked.

Ai counted, "...Five hundred gil, plus a button."

"Oh, we're gonna find something nice with that..." Ken rolled his eyes. "A bargain-bin long sword... ...He was better off with that rusted blood sword."

"What if we pooled our money and got something?" Alicia asked. "He _did_ give it to Zero to bargain with him, remember?"

"Yeah, I know, I guess we owe him this much..." Ken sighed, he went to his travel bag and pulled out a bag of gil. "I have about a thousand I've been saving up for a new crossbow with, he can have that."

Alicia pulled out a bag of gil. "I have eight hundred total."

"I thought you only had five hundred yesterday..." Lavian trailed off.

"Yeah, Rad had three hundred." Alicia gave Lavian a grin.

Lavian chuckled and got her bag of gil. "...Six hundred and twenty."

Ai pulled out her bag. "Our travel budget aside, I have a little over a thousand... So, in total, we have..."

Ken spoke up, "Three thousand four hundred and twenty. Enough for a coral sword with one-twenty left over...Unless you guys want to go cheap with a mythril blade, for a little under half the price."

Ai looked to everyone, "Coral sword."

"Coral sword," Lavian said.

"Coral sword," Ken said.

"Coral sword," Alicia said.

"Mythril blade," a voice spoke up.

Everyone turned to see Rad behind Ai, glaring "And Alicia, stay outta my wallet!" He went over to Alicia, holding his hand out.

"Too bad Rad," Alicia chuckled, moving the bag of gil from his reach. "We're forcing you to volunteer your funds to buy Osamu a new sword. He _did_ give up his prized blood sword to save your neck. You owe him this much."

"But I wanted to buy a new dagger with that!" Rad tried to snatch the money from Alicia.

With a grin, Ai said, "Shining light..."

"I'LL BE GOOD!" Rad shouted, backing away. "Why does the church give you access to such destructive power?"

"'Cause even a priest needs to defend herself," Ai replied, grinning. "Or have a good bargaining chip." She gave her money to Ken. "Since you know weapon prices so well, I want you to buy the sword."

"Right," Ken nodded. "You guys start off to Barius Hill, I'll catch up." Ken took everyone else's money. "Good luck! Hope you find Carrot in less than two pieces."

"Thanks," Ai rolled her eyes as Ken ran off to a weapon shop. She went downstairs and found Osamu on his second mug of ale. "Come on, Osamu, we're going on a search and rescue mission."

"...Too drunk..." Osamu nearly fell over in his chair.

The bartender spoke up, "I've never seen a guy get so loaded on just two ales..."

Ai groaned, "Osamu, we're going for a walk..."

"...No thanks..."

"Come on!" Lavian shouted.

Osamu sighed, sipping his mug.

"Osamu, walkies!" Rad shouted.

"...No..."

"MOVE IT!" Ai grabbed Osamu's cape and dragged him off the barstool. Osamu didn't put up much of a fight, he simply let Ai drag him out of the bar, giving the occasional sigh every now and then. Once they got to the road, Lavian and Rad helped lift him up.

"Where are we going?" Osamu asked.

Lavian reeled back at the smell of Osamu's breath. "Osamu! You reek of ale! How much did you have to drink!?"

"...Two..." Osamu replied, nearly falling over.

"Lightweight..." Rad muttered, helping Osamu stand up.

"Osamu, we're looking for a pet, Carrot, it's wearing a red collar with a gold name tag...Can you help us find it?" Ai asked.

"I'll go check the...the...The bar!" Osamu started back into the bar, Alicia and Lavian grabbed him and started dragged him in the direction of Barius hill. "Stop! I think I saw someone eating a carrot! We should check it out!"

"Well, I'm sure this'll be a barrel of laughs," Rad rolled his eyes. "You sure we should drag him along?"

"...Not anymore, but we're just looking for a pet, what's the worst he can do?" Ai asked.

"Get himself eaten?" Rad asked.

"Okay, what's the worst he can do to us?"

"Won't know 'til it happens," Rad shrugged, starting after Alicia and Lavian. "Wait up! I don't want to miss a moment of this!"

The base of Barius Hill was quiet...Which was actually normal for the base of Barius Hill. The monsters were found closer to the summit, rather than the base (which was a common campground for hunters going to and from Warjilis to sell furs).

Ai and the group managed to get Osamu to the base of the hill. Osamu hadn't sobered up at all...In fact, the second ale was taking effect by the time they got to the base. Rad was astounded by how out of it Osamu was.

Osamu finally realized his surroundings when he walked into a signpost that read:

BARIUS HILL

DANGER:  
MONSTER ACTIVITY IS HIGH, ENTER AT  
OWN RISK

Below it was another sign that read:

Lost a limb fighting a dragon?

Come down to Doctor Banon's Infirmary,  
two blocks from the entrance of Lionel.

Good care, good prices.

"...Well, that's not a good sign..." Alicia muttered.

"You obviously haven't seen this..." Ai pointed behind a rock. A skeleton with a rusted sword in hand and rusted armor lay there, it didn't seem to be very old. "...I think we might want to write up some wills before going up to Zaland...Just to be safe..."

"...So...We're heading up to Zaland now..." Osamu stood up, he went over to the rock and gaped. "The...the blood sword!"

"What?" Lavian gave Osamu a strange look.

Osamu reached for the rusted sword the skeleton held. "A...A new one! I can fight again!"

"O-Osamu! Wait! No!" Ai shouted as Osamu darted off into Barius Hill.

"...Well, it was nice knowing him. I'm going back to the bar, I call first choice of his stuff." Rad started back, Ai grabbed him. "Hey!"

"Now we've got to find Carrot _and_ Osamu...Alicia, you and Lavian go and find Osamu. Alicia, I want you to use _whatever magic necessary_ to stop him from killing himself."

"Paralyze, got it," Alicia saluted.

"Rad, you look for Carrot, I'll wait here for Ken," Ai said.

"Why do I have to go?" Rad asked.

"You'd send a poor defenseless priest alone into Barius Hill during peak monster season?" Ai asked.

"...Are you implying that you're even remotely defenseless?" Rad asked.

"Okay, do you want to know what'll happen if you don't go?"

"Going," Rad started off. Alicia and Lavian went in Osamu's direction.

Ai groaned, "This isn't our day..."

Deep within Barius Hill, Osamu swung his 'blood sword' wildly. The rusted broadsword was put to the test against any foe he came across...At least, it would, it he came across any foes.

"Fear the Hokuten Knight Osamu and his blood sword!" Osamu screamed, loosing his balance. "Whoah... The...Hokuten Knight Osamu...needs to...lie down..." Osamu groaned, using his sword to support him.

As Osamu went to a boulder to rest on, a dark shadow loomed over him.

Instinctively, Osamu slashed at his foe...Or, at least, slashed at something. His sword hit a tree and shattered. Osamu's jaw dropped in the sheer horror of, once again, losing a precious, precious blood sword (even if it was just an equally rusty broad sword). Osamu fell to his knees, tossed the blade away and sighed. "Go, monster, kill me...I am a shame to knights everywhere!"

The monster closed in...

At the base of Barius Hill, Ken finally came with a brand new coral sword sheathed in his hands.

"Finally," Ai sighed. "We're in trouble."

"What's wrong?" Ken asked.

"Osamu's completely wasted, he mistook a rusted sword for another blood sword and ran off into Barius Hill in search of adventure." Ai explained. "Rad's looking for Carrot, while Alicia and Lavian are looking for Osamu."

"Yeesh... How much did he have to drink if he's like this?" Ken asked.

"Two mugs of ale."

"...Please tell me the ale was drugged."

Ai shook her head.

"...Well, this explains why he could sip a mug of ale for hours on end..." Ken shrugged.

Osamu's scream, followed by Alicia and Lavian's, rang out from Barius Hill.

"That...can't be too far away!" Ken pulled out his crossbow and charged off with Ai. They met Rad halfway to the source of the screams.

What they saw left them both in awe and slightly disgusted.

Osamu was in the tentacles of a Malboro...A Malboro with a red collar and a golden tag with 'Carrot' engraved onto it. Carrot, an oh-so-affectionate abnormality, was holding Osamu and licking him like a dog.

Osamu was covered in slime, but otherwise unharmed and petting the creature on the head.

Alicia had her head turned away in disgust, while Lavian said, "Aw, how cute! Osamu made a friend!" Jokingly, of course.

Ken lowered his crossbow. "...I think I'm gonna puke..."

"...I think I need a drink..." Ai stated.

"Good girl! Good girl!" Osamu laughed. "Put me down, now! Put me down!"

Within the hour, Carrot was returned to the squire at the bar. He was overjoyed and immediately paid them a week's pay with a bonus for Osamu, to cover a good bath and his laundry.

Ai counted the money as Ken and Rad helped Osamu to the nearest bath. They'd give Osamu his new sword after he sobered up.

Alicia and Lavian waited outside of their room as Ai counted the money. They stood guard against Osamu until he smelled like something besides rotten fish.

"People actually keep Malboros as _pets?_" Alicia spoke up.

"Well, the countess probably sees it like one of those puppies that are so ugly, they're cute. Kinda like Rad." Lavian replied.

"...Rad?" Alicia looked over to Lavian, grinning.

"...Uh...Nothing..." Lavian glanced away.

Ai opened the door. Alicia and Lavian quickly turned to face her.

Lavian spoke first, "Ai, how much--"

Ai gave a list and a bag of gil to Lavian. "You're in charge of weapons and armor. This is the list of what we need." She gave a list and a bag of gil to Alicia. "You're in charge of supplies. Food, water, potions, everything."

"How much was there!?" Lavian shouted.

"More than enough, apparently one can make a living as a Malboro walker. That and he tossed in a bit of a bonus for our troubles, namely, Osamu's stench." Ai grinned. "We'll stay a night in Zaland and head up to Dorter from there."

"When do we set out?" Alicia asked.

"Provided Osamu's not hung over, tomorrow."

To Be Continued...

The upcoming chapters are taking some liberties on Shiba's notes, due to their vague nature past Barius Hill. The only in-depth notes I have left to go on is the role of Zero, which I can't go much further into right now.

This Proposition appeared in both Final Fantasy Tactics and Final Fantasy XII, both versions involve a Malboro hunt.

Next chapter is a special chapter, I won't spoil anything.


End file.
